Wildest Dreams
by AngelEyes213
Summary: Senior year of high school is supposed to be filled with fun and exciting events. It's a time to relax and hang out with all of your friends before everyone leaves for college. But what happens when a forbidden romance complicates things and makes all of those fun events difficult?
1. Chapter 1

Chapter One:

My Mother slides two blueberry pancakes onto my plate and then places three pieces of bacon next to them. "Are you excited for you last first day of school?" She asks. She smiles down at me and I shrug.

"I'm more excited to get the year over with, to be honest." I grab the maple syrup and start to pour it over my pancakes.

My Father looks down from his newspaper, quirking an eyebrow. "Now Beatrice, don't talk like that." He chastises me softly. "You'll miss high school once you graduate. It happens to everybody." I have to stop myself from rolling my eyes at him – he'll just chastise me again.

_How could anybody miss high school after they leave it?_

"He's right, you know." My Mother stands behind me and runs her fingers lightly through my hair. "Even Caleb admitted that he missed high school." Caleb was my older brother who was currently at some fancy business place sucking up to the CEO. He was smart, which is why he was one of the highest paid managers in the business and also the youngest – at only twenty-six.

I could tell them that the only reason he missed it was because he missed being Valedictorian and showing off how intelligent he was in front of the whole school, but that would only result in looks from my parents. So I took a bite of my pancakes.

My Mom hands me my book bag and I stand up from the table, hugging her. "You don't want to be late." She smiles softly at me, the corner of her green eyes crinkling with her smile. "Have a nice day." She kisses my cheek and I hug my Dad before I grab my car keys and head out.

When I pulled into the school parking lot, I headed towards the senior lot and saw a small group of people huddled around a silver Jeep. I pulled into the spot next to it and shut the car off.

As soon as I got out of the car, a familiar, cheery voice called my name. "Tris!"

Looking up I see my best friend, Christina, waving me over towards her. I smile and start to head towards the group. Christina is standing next to her boyfriend of three years, Will, and his best friend, Al. Al welcomes me with a warm – maybe a little too warm – smile and Christina wraps one arm around my waist, pulling me into a side hug.

"What are you guys doing?" I ask, turning my attention to the pieces of paper spread out on the hood of Will's Jeep.

"Comparing class schedules." She says, holding out her hand. I reach into my front pocket in my book bag and pull out my own schedule and hand it to her. She smoothes it out and places it at the end. "We all have lunch together!" She smiles brightly and I watch as Will and Al exchange a high-five. "Tris and I have Government, English and Statistics together." When she looks up at me, her soft brown skin glows in the early September sunlight and her brown eyes shine with excitement. "Will and I have second period gym together and Al and Tris have fourth period gym together."

I look to Al, who smiles at me again and then looks back towards the schedules. I sigh and run a hand through my hair, glancing around the parking lot.

There are underclassmen getting off the buses and running to meet their friends before class. Teachers are trying to get out of the parking lot quickly to avoid all the commotion. While looking around, I notice one teacher in particular – mainly because I've never seen him before and also because from a distance he looked kind of attractive.

I snap my fingers in front of Christina's face, keeping my focus on him. "Who's that?" I point in the direction of the teacher and I hear Christina gasp.

"That's Mr. Eaton." Will speaks up, side-eyeing Al like he's irritated. "He's the new lacrosse coach and Government teacher." Christina quickly glances down at our schedules and then looks back up at me, smiling brightly.

She winks at me and says, "Guess who our teacher for Government is?" The first bell rings and we all grab our schedules and headed for the main building.

Christina, Al and I have first period art together – which is basically just an easy class to take for the credit – so we part ways with Will once we enter the building. Will turns to head to his Psychology class while the three of us head downstairs to the art room.

The first few periods go by quickly; most of the teachers didn't really have anything planned other than activities that helped each of us get to know each other – and honestly, they didn't take long since a majority of my classes were strictly seniors.

By the time fourth period ended, I left gym a little early to meet Christina outside of her American Issues classroom to walk to Government together.

We made our way into the classroom and towards two desks near the back that were right next to each other. We sat down and I placed my bag on the floor, glancing up at the front of the room where our new teacher was writing a few things on the board. Even from the back he looked attractive – he was well built with cropped dark brown, almost black, hair. He had on a black button up and a gray vest. When he turned around, he clapped his hands together to both get the class's attention and to get the chalk off his hands. I noticed that he had dark blue eyes, a bit of a five-o'clock shadow and a hooked nose.

God, he was even more attractive than I thought.

"A lot of you don't know me," he started off, glancing around the classroom. I could feel my face getting hotter when his gaze landed on me. "I'm Mr. Eaton and I will be your new Government teacher for the year. While also teaching Government, I am also the new guys' lacrosse coach." A few of the guys in the class hollered and high-fived each other, earning a small smile from Mr. Eaton.

After he finished talking about himself, he went on to explain what he wanted from us. "I'm going to be taking roll and when I call your name you can tell me the name you preferred to be called and then give me two interesting facts about yourself."

_Ugh, seriously?!_

He started going off the class list and he was almost sidetracked by the few lacrosse players in the class, but was fortunately able to get back on track right away.

When he got to Christina's name she said, "My name's Christina, I'm going to college for Criminal Justice and I play on the varsity softball team." She looked over at me and smiled and I rolled my eyes.

I was surprised she didn't say anything about Will, to be honest.

After a few more names he finally came to my name. Everyone turned to stare at me and I sat up straighter, suddenly wanting to show that I wasn't as anxious as I really was. "My name's Beatrice, but I like to be called Tris," Mr. Eaton scribbled that on his roll-sheet and then looked back up at me, sending a nervous jolt through my body. "And, uhm, I want to go to Brown University next fall and…" My mind suddenly went blank and I felt my face get five times hotter than it already was. _What was something interesting about me?_ "Uhm…and I – I'm a black belt."

That last one was really, really lame and something someone in middle school bragged about – which is actually when I got my black belt, but nobody needed to know that.

After he called the next person's name, I sank down in my seat and ran a hand through my hair. Glancing at Christina, I saw that my answer wasn't that bad – and compared to some of these kids' answers? Yeah, mine was pretty fricken amazing.

Once we were done that, Mr. Eaton stood at the front of the classroom, crossing his arms over his chest. "So now that we are done with that…" He looks around the room and then smirks. "Does anyone have any questions?"

The question seems more like a dare. He has to know what a majority of the girls in the class want to ask, but yet, he doesn't expand on what type of questions he'll answer.

Everyone kept looking around the room, waiting for someone to ask something. I mean, there was about fifteen minutes left in class and we all knew nobody wanted to spend it in silence.

Christina's hand shot up and he nodded to her. "Well since nobody else is going to ask…" _Oh no_. "Are you single?" I'm pretty sure she was the only girl who could've asked that without getting flustered – mainly because she had Will and didn't really care about any other guy – and she did it with a straight face.

Mr. Eaton laughed, obviously knowing someone was going to ask that, and leaned back against the wall. "Yes, I am single." A few girls around the room giggled.

Christina's question acted as some sort of ice breaker because a bunch of other people had questions. They weren't as personal as Christina's, but they were still about him.

By the end of class, I knew that Mr. Eaton had originally gone to college to pursue a career in law, but deciding to become a teacher at last minute because it seemed like a more promising career and he enjoyed teaching. He also played lacrosse in high school and college and even a little bit of ice hockey while in high school.

Once the bell rang for sixth period, Christina and I hurried down to the lunchroom and chose a circular table near the front of the cafeteria. Will, Al and three of our other friends – Marlene, Lynn and Uriah, joined us at the table.

Christina and I headed up to the salad line to grab some lunch and then sat back down. When we got back to the table, I heard the end of Lynn and Marlene's conversation.

"…No, but he's like _insanely _attractive. Too attractive to be a teacher, honestly." Marlene poked at a grape in her fruit cup and Lynn pulled apart her cheesesteak.

Lynn looked up at towards the front corner of the cafeteria and I followed her gaze and saw Mr. Eaton standing against the wall, talking to one of the math teachers. "I don't know. I mean, he's good looking, but I don't understand why all the girls are swooning over him – it's not like they can even flirt with him, he's not allowed to flirt back. So what's the point?" Marlene looked like she wanted to argue, but then popped a grape in her mouth. "What about you, Tris? Do you think he's attractive?"

I looked at Lynn and then back at Mr. Eaton, and when I did, I was met with a gaze from him. Embarrassed, I quickly turned my head back towards the table. "Uhm…I mean, he's okay looking."

Christina tossed a piece of lettuce at me. "Oh, please! You were stumbling over your words when he asked you to introduce yourself. And you aren't one to get shy in front of the class." That was true and I felt my face get warm with blush.

Will and Uriah burst into laughter, Al shifted in his seat, and the three girls started laughing.

I wanted to turn back around to look at Eaton again, but I could still feel his gaze on me and I suddenly felt stiff and self-conscious.

_What the hell is wrong with me_?!

After lunch, Christina, Marlene, Al and I headed to English together. We have assigned seats, but thankfully we choose what seats we want to be assigned to. Shortly afterwards, our teacher introduces himself as Max. He says he likes people calling him by his first name and nobody really seems to feel like arguing.

Thankfully English was our last class of the day, so after the bell rang, we headed out to the parking lot and all grouped up around Will's Jeep again. Christina jumps up onto the hood of the Jeep while we lean against it, waiting for the others to arrive.

"Will you get your ass off my car?" Will comes striding towards us and tosses his book bag into the back of the Jeep.

Christina winks at him. "Oh, like you wouldn't enjoy an imprint of my ass on the hood of your car." Will grabs her around the waist and lifts her down from the hood.

"Actually, I prefer my car to be dent free." He glances over her shoulder, pretending to check for dents.

"Is that a Jeep Wrangler?" A voice startles all of us and we all turn towards the voice.

Mr. Eaton is standing on the other side of the car from us, inspecting the side of the car.

Will looks at Al, who shrugs. "Yeah, it's a 2008 Jeep Wrangler." Eaton nods and looks up, seeming slightly embarrassed to be asking about his students' cars. Christina and I looked at each other with the same _"I don't care about car-talk" _face.

"I had one like this when I was younger – I mean, not the 2008 version. But I had a Wrangler. It was my first car." He seems to realize that there is more than just Will in the group, and he glances around. When he looks at me, I feel like I'm frozen and can't look away from him. He stares at me for much longer than he did with anybody else.

I quickly turn my head, throwing my hair over my shoulder to avoid looking at him again. "Chris, I gotta go. I have to get home before my parents do." I hug and turn around and walk around to the other side of the Jeep to get to my car. I reach into my jacket pocket to grab my keys and drop them. I start to reach down to get them but someone is already handing them to me.

Looking up I see a pair of dark blue eyes staring at me. "You dropped these…" Mr. Eaton hands me my keys back and when he places them in my hand, his fingertips barely touch my skin but the little contact sends a shock through my arm and I instantly jerk my hand back.

"Uhm, thanks. Sorry." I open the back door to the car and toss my book bag in and then head towards the driver's seat.

I start the car up and let it idle for a few minutes. I don't realize what I'm doing until I look down and see that I'm tracing the spot where he touched me with the tips of my fingers. Gripping the steering wheel, I internally yell at myself for being so stupid and such a little school girl.

_He's your teacher! _

If only I could get that inner voice to shut the hell up.

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**Reviews and comments are incredibly helpful to me!**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two:

The next few days went by incredibly slowly, as the first week of school tends to do. Most of my classes jumped right into things and began the work right away. Some, like gym, acted like it was the first week of school for everyone, not just the freshmen.

I tried to pay attention in a majority of my classes as much as possible, but it was difficult when I had some of my closest friends in practically every class with me. And it wasn't like we were all sitting across the room from each other. None of my teachers cared about seating charts so they let us sit wherever we wanted to sit, which meant everybody sat near their friends.

During lunch, however, we spent a majority of the time discussing the up-coming Homecoming dance. Well, when I say "we" I mean the girls; the boys mainly discussed the Homecoming football game. While Al or Will weren't on the football team, Uriah and our other friend Edward were, but all the guys were pumped because this year we actually have a chance of winning the game.

"We need to go dress shopping soon if we want to get the good dresses." Christina was talking excitedly to me, Marlene and Lynn and we were all discussing which stores to hit up. "We should go after school."

Marlene nods. "I can drive Lynn and Tris, can you drive Chris?" I nodded and looked up as I saw someone walking towards our table.

All conversations cease at the circular table as Mr. Eaton comes to stand behind Will and Al. He clasps them both on the shoulders and says, "Sorry guys, practice is cancelled after school." When neither of them says anything he speaks up again, smiling. "Wow, I can tell you two are really disappointed."

I can't help but laugh at Al and Will's expressions, both filled with the relief of escaping another three hour practice for the fourth time this week. Mr. Eaton glances at me, quirking an eyebrow and I cover my mouth, turning my head away from him to look at Christina.

After a few more words with the two, Mr. Eaton turned and left the table, heading back towards the front of the cafeteria.

"Tris?" Christina shoves my arm and I bring myself back to reality. "You good to go shopping after school today?"

"Uhm, uhh, yeah! I should be. I just have to stop at home before to drop off my stuff."

Once lunch is over, the Statistics group heads to that class while the others head to their respective classes.

While we're walking to class, Christina loops her arm through mine and leans close to my face to talk to me in the crowded halls. "You know, if I didn't know better, I would think that Mr. Eaton is a distraction to you." She smirks. "But I know you, Tris, and I know that you don't get distracted by guys. Well, at least not guys from our school." She winks and I shove her shoulder.

Christina was referring to our Sophomore year when the two of us, along with a group of about six other people, went roller skating and while there, I saw a rather…attractive guy a few years older, maybe college age, and I was so distracted by his good looks that I had tripped over a fallen child and almost smashed my face into a wall.

Yeah, I know - great first impression for the guy, right?

But she was right. I didn't get distracted by guys in our school. I mean, I knew there were a few – like Al – who showed some interest in me, but I could never reciprocate those feelings.

After school ended, Christina and I headed back to my house so I could drop off my book bag and then headed to meet with Marlene and Lynn at the mall in the city. It was one of the biggest malls in Chicago and I loved it. It was only about a thirty-five minute drive to the mall from town and had almost every store necessary.

The four of us headed towards the Macy's and towards the dress section. Christina and Lynn headed towards the more…revealing dresses, while Marlene and I hung around the more girly dresses.

"So I'm thinking of asking Uriah to the dance, but him and his friends seem so against going." She stops looking through the dresses and instead watches me.

I shrug, pulling out a fit-and-flare type black dress with lace long sleeves, and hung it over my arm. I continued to shift through the other dresses. "So what? Ask him anyways. He's probably just saying he doesn't want to go because he probably thinks you don't want to go."

She smiles at me and the nods. "You planning on asking anybody?" I roll my eyes and laugh, pulling out a dark blue silk dress and placing it over the blue one.

"Not likely." I turn away from the conversation and heads toward the changing rooms. I first try on the black one and poke my head out, looking for Christina or someone. I leave the changing room section and start to walk towards where I can see Christina's head when I almost run into Mr. Eaton.

I stop in my tracks and look up at him. "Mr. Eaton." I blink, surprised. "Surprising to see you here."

He smiles. "It's Tris, right?" I nod and he laughs. "Yeah, I know how that feels. It's weird seeing a teacher outside of school." He's holding a wrapped box in his left hand and I glance down at it. "Oh, I'm here to pick up a gift for my Mom. It's her birthday soon."

Remembering what I'm wearing, I cross my arms tightly across my chest – a bad habit that shows when I'm nervous or embarrassed.

I see him look me up and down once and then his blue eyes settle back on my face. "And you're here shopping for the dance, aren't you?" I nod and can feel my face getting warmer. "Well, I like that dress." His free hand rubs the back of his neck and he clears his throat. "I mean…it's a nice…I have get going."

He hurried off and I watched him, dumbstruck, until I heard Christina's voice. "Hey, Tris! We found our – whoa." She comes to a halt in front of me. "That dress look amazing on you!"

I was still flustered by Mr. Eaton's comment and was out of it until we got back to the car after everyone made their purchase. I had bought the black dress, the girls believing it was because they all liked it. But in all honesty, I bought it not only because I liked it, but because Eaton's comment held a lot more weight than it should've.

After we grab a quick drink, we leave the mall and I take Christina home. She waves to me as she heads up the driveway to her house and I head home.

My Mom was in the kitchen, baking some chicken and pasta on top of the stove. She smiled at me when I walked in and I gave her a quick kiss on the cheek. "Hey." I lift myself easily onto the counter and cross my ankles. "Where's Dad?"

She turns a piece of chicken over in the pan and then smoothes her hands down the front of her apron. "He's working late at the office again." She sighs, turning around.

"He's always working late." I mumble in disapproval. With a sad smile she turns her back to me again and stirs the pasta.

She says, "Well he helps run the city, Beatrice. He has a lot of work to do and most of the time it has to be done within the day which means he needs to stay at work."

My Dad works at City Hall alongside the Mayor. He wants to run for State Senate, but if he did get the job, it would require us moving out to Washington D.C. and so he promised not to do that until I graduated high school. As strict and stiff as he was, he had my interests at heart. My Mom, while not working directly for the city in the political sense, she still helped out with a lot of the committees and events. But during the day, she was a middle school history teacher.

Yeah, both my parents were government and history majors in school. I was surprised how calm they acted when Caleb told them he didn't want to pursue anything involved in politics or anything of the like.

"So did you find a dress?" I watch as my Mom plates a few pieces of chicken and I nod, staring absentmindedly at the plate. She smiles. "That's good. Do you plan on asking anyone to the dance?"

My shoulders slump and I hang my head, irritated. "Mom, I've told you before, I do not want to go to the dance with anyone."

"I know, but I was just thinking maybe Al would've asked you."

"Mom…" I look at her, narrowing my eyes. "I don't want to go to the dance with anyone."

She sighs, leaning her hip against the counter. "I know, but I'm just worried you won't find someone special."

I slide down from the counter and roll my eyes. "Because my entire life revolves around getting a boyfriend, right?" Grabbing the garment bag holding my dress from the table, I head up to my room.

Opening my closet door, I hung up the garment bag on an opened hook and then shut the door. I changed out of my day clothes and into a pair of gray sweatpants with a fitted black long sleeved top. After running a brush through my hair, I threw it up into a messy bun and then sat down cross-legged in the middle of my bed.

I started up my laptop and while I waited for it to load, I grabbed my English binder and Government binder and dropped them on the bed in front of me.

As soon as I was logged onto my laptop, I pulled up Skype and clicked on Christina's name. When she answered, I could tell she was in a car and the quality of the video proved she was on her phone. "Tris! Hey!"

I smiled at her and flipped through my Government homework. "I have a quick question…" I look up at my computer screen and she has her head turned, talking to someone. "Chris! Focus, me, question."

"What's wrong, boo?"

"Do you understand any of the Government homework? I'm so lost, it's not even funny. And I can't avoid failing this class; you know how my parents are."

Her line is silent for a bit and then her voice comes in through the speakers again. "How is Government one of your worst subjects? Your parents are both experts in that area!"

I know she meant it as a joke, but it still stung. My parents being experts in social studies and government topics made asking them for help difficult. I tried it once, back in middle school, and they acted as if I insulted them and was told to figure it out on my own. They weren't being bad parents, they were just like any other over-achieving set of parents – they hated when their kids didn't pick up on everything they did.

Christina most likely picked up my train of thoughts, because she sighed and said, "Tris, if you really are having difficulty, why don't you ask Mr. Eaton for help? Go to him Monday after class and ask if he can help you out or something. I'm sure he'd be happy to help you pass."

Frustrated, I give up and click out of the conversation, shutting my laptop. "You're a lot of help…" I mumble to myself.

After a few minutes of trying – unsuccessfully – to do my Government homework, I move on to my English homework. I finish the work within the matter of a few minutes and then my Mom is calling me downstairs to dinner.

I stare at my Government binder for a few minutes, until the black and white swirls start to blend together, and contemplate asking my Mom for help. I then decide it's better that I don't ask her, because then she'd tell my Dad I asked for help and if he finds out, he'd probably go to school and yell at Mr. Eaton for not teaching correctly.

Yeah, so not asking for help.

* * *

**I'm honestly really surprised at the amount of responses I got from the first chapter. I didn't really think that it would get a lot of reviews so quickly. I'm really happy with the responses, though. It's helping me think about this story a lot more.**

**Anyways, I really want this story to be longer than my other one. I want to be able to develop the romantic relationships over a longer amount of time rather than just having them jump right into everything, because let's be honest, that kind of makes the story boring.**

**Reviews and comments are lovely! **


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

On Monday in Government, the period felt like it went by so slowly because I was so preoccupied with worry about asking Mr. Eaton to help tutor me. I was so worried about him denying me help, even Christina reminding me that he wasn't technically allowed to deny a student academic help.

After class finally ended, I packed up my bag a little slower than normal and told Christina to head down to lunch without me. Once everyone left the classroom I walked up to his desk.

When I approached his desk, he looked up and seemed surprised to see me. "Tris? Is everything alright? Normally you're down at lunch by now."

I nod and shift my binder from one arm to the other. "Yeah, I know. But I have a question…"

His blue eyes look up at me and my breath catches in my throat, making it feel like I can't breathe for a few seconds. "Yes?"

"I was wondering if you could maybe…tutor me?"

He's silent for a few seconds before standing up. When he stands up, I have to look up at him, what with him towering over me. "Tris, it's only the second week of school. Why do you need tutoring?"

All the hope I had crumbled in front of me. I had really, really hoped he wouldn't question my obsessive need for tutoring and that he would allow it without a series of questions.

"I know, and I feel really pathetic for asking for help this early, but it's my parents…" I begin and when I look up at him, he has his arms crossed over his chest and he nods slightly. "And if I don't get at least a ninety-eight percent in this class, they freak out. Well, mainly my Dad."

Mr. Eaton nods. "Because of his position with the Mayor…" Some of that earlier hope returns and I straighten up and nod once. "Alright, well I'm here after school until about four today. So if you want to start after school, I can do that."

Smiling, I hug my binder to my chest – because if I didn't do that, then I would probably hug him and that wouldn't go over well with him, probably. "Thank you so much!" I turn to leave, but then remember something. "One more thing, if you could refrain from mentioning the tutoring to my parents I would really appreciate that."

"What's your excuse for staying after school two hours after dismissal?" He asks, a small smile curling at the corners of his lips.

I shrug. "I'll just say that I'm going to be at Christina's to work on homework or something. They'll believe me."

He shakes his head. "I take it you don't lie to them very much?"

Smirking, I lean against the doorframe. "Well, they trust me enough not to look too deeply into my lies."

His smile disappears and he's suddenly serious. "You should head to lunch. I'll see you after school."

I tell him 'thank you' and then head down to the cafeteria. I skip out on buying lunch and instead just sit down at our usual lunch table next to Christina.

Christina and Will were discussing their weekend plans and Lynn and Marlene were deep in another conversation. Meanwhile, Uriah and Al were discussing the lacrosse game on Friday and Al looked over at me. "Tris, are you going to the game?"

"What? Oh, uhm, I don't know. It depends on how much homework I have."

Al rolled his eyes and leaned towards me. "It's the beginning of the year; you shouldn't have that much homework."

I shrug. "Well when you have all AP and honors classes, you never know how much work you'll have."

After school, I told Christina that I had tutoring with Mr. Eaton and that I wouldn't be able to drive her home. She told me it was fine and that she would get a ride with Will. After I put away the necessary books in my locker, I grabbed my Government text book and my binder and headed to Mr. Eaton's classroom.

He was standing behind his desk, flipping through a book. When I walked in, he glanced up at me and nodded towards a set of desks.

I sat down in one chair and placed my binder and textbook on the desk.

"Okay, so we're just going to start with what we're doing in class which would be chapter five." He sits down in the desk next to me and turns his chair slightly so that he can face me. "And we're going to start with Presidential succession."

I roll my eyes. "I already know the presidential succession; it's the President, Vice President, Speaker of the House, President Pro Tempore and then Secretary of State and Secretary of the Treasury." He quirks an eyebrow at me. "And then it continues down until the last remaining successor." I shrug. "That's probably the only thing I know by heart when it comes to Government."

He nods. "That's all and good, but can you explain why they chose that particular succession order?" I gave him a blank look. "That's what I thought."

For the next hour and a half, we discussed succession order and the Articles of Confederation. He went into depth with each topic and after we were finished, I honestly felt a lot better about the class and knew I would be able to pass it.

"So you want to go to Brown University?" He leans his right arm on the desk and I look at him and nod. "That's in the Northeast."

I nod and shrug, shoving my binder into my book-bag. "Yeah, well, I kind of want to get away from Chicago. I mean, I've lived here my entire life and college is the first chance I have to get away from it all."

He nods. "I know what you mean. As soon as I graduated high school, I got far away from here."

"You grew up here?"

Mr. Eaton smiles and I find myself distracted by his blue eyes yet again. "You seemed surprised."

I laugh – and it's an embarrassed, shaky laugh. "Well, I mean, I just assumed…"

"Assumed I'm new to Chicago?" He shakes his head. "Nope, I grew up here. In fact, I went to this high school. If you look in the trophy case, you'll see a few trophies with my name on them."

Smirking, I say, "Oh, are you bragging?"

His laugh almost seeps into my skin, warming me. It's such a pleasant, genuine, real laugh – one that you want to listen to over and over again because it is such a rare occurrence. "I mean, I have trophies to prove it, so why not?"

"There's this thing called dignity." He laughs again and moves his arm. When he does that, his fingertips just barely touch mine, but there's a jolt of electricity that freezes my hand in place on the desk. I stare at our hands for a few seconds and then shift in my chair and draw my hand back slowly.

Standing up, I pull my book-bag on over my shoulder. "So the test is on Thursday, right?" I ask, avoiding eye contact. Mr. Eaton nods and hands me my textbook. "Thanks for…this."

"It was no problem." I turn to leave, but his voice stops me. "I'll see you tomorrow, same time?"

For a few moments I'm shocked. I didn't think he would be willing to tutor me again tomorrow. I mainly thought he'd just tutor me today and maybe once a week anytime I asked.

"Uhm, yeah, definitely." He gives me a polite smile and I turn and head to the parking and towards my car. I toss my books in the backseat and then start the car up, letting it sit in 'park' for awhile.

The next few days after school I spent in Mr. Eaton's room. We would go over whatever topics he planned to go over, and then we would just talk for the remaining time.

It was nice, to be honest. I mean, I got along with a lot of my teachers but with Mr. Eaton, it was different. He didn't talk to me like a student; he talked to me like we were the same age and old friends. We would talk about some of our interests and he would occasionally ask me about my family life and what I wanted to study while at Brown. However, the conversations tended to be very one-sided, because he wouldn't answer certain questions and I assumed it was just because there was a line teachers couldn't cross, but there was more to it than that.

"Tris?" Looking up in front of me, Mr. Eaton stood in front of my desk holding a test in his hand. "You okay to take this today?" His voice is lower and I realize it's because other students are all taking their tests.

I nod and he places the test on my desk. "Good luck." He whispers before heading towards his desk.

For the next forty minutes, I listen to people scribbling their answers onto their tests and then scraping their chairs against the linoleum floors to hand in their tests. All the while, I'm trying to remember the correct answers and I try not to second guess myself when I do get an answer down.

When the bell rings, I stand up from my desk and clutch my test in my hands. "Are you finished?" Mr. Eaton looks at me, one of his eyebrows arching. I nod and hand him the test packet. "Okay, I will have this graded for you by the end of the day. Stop by after eighth period and you can see what you got." I thank him and then follow behind Christina to the lunchroom.

After eighth period, I barely tell Christina not to wait up for me before I'm shoving through the underclassmen to get to Mr. Eaton's room. My hands are sweaty and shaky and I'm worrying about if I failed the test.

When I get to his classroom, I walk in and abruptly stop when I notice he's talking to someone. "Oh, I didn't realize you were busy…"

They both turn towards me and the blonde woman has a tight-lipped smile. "Ms. Prior, so nice to see you. How're your parents?"

"They're…good." I look over at Mr. Eaton. "If you're busy, I can come back tomorrow during class."

Ms. Matthews shakes her head, a few blonde strands of hair falling from her otherwise perfect bun. "No, it's fine. I was just leaving." She turns back him. "Just give me a simple evaluation of him tomorrow after school, Tobias."

I step aside to let Ms. Matthews leave and watch as she heads down the hallway. Ms. Matthews was our, very strict, principle and a lot of the students didn't like her. She did, however, have a certain fascination with the more advanced kids in the AP classes, even if they didn't particularly like her.

Finally, I realize he's staring at me and I can't help but remember what Ms. Matthews said. "Your first name's Tobias?" He nods, shrugging.

"What? Did you think I didn't have a first name?" There's a hint of a smile playing at his lips, but it doesn't develop.

I shake my head. "No, it's just a…different name. But I like it."

A few moments of silence fall between us and then he clears his throat and hands me a paper. "Here's your test." He handed it to me flipped upside down and there's no hint of humor in his face.

My stomach drops and I want to run to the bathroom and throw up. A test flipped upside down is universal for 'failure'.

Hesitantly, I take the test and take a deep breath before flipping it over.

_98%!_

"I got a ninety-eight percent?!" I can't help but smile and Mr. Eaton nods and smiles, too. "Wait…this isn't favoritism, is it?" A little bit of my happiness disappears.

He shakes his head. "Not at all, you earned that grade." When I don't say anything and just stare at my test, he asks, "And what makes you think you'd be one of my favorite students?"

I shrug and pull my gaze away from my test and focus on him. "Thank you so much, this is – this is amazing. I can't even explain how thankful I am for your help."

Without thinking, I throw my arms around him and hug him tightly. It takes about seven seconds for me to realize what I did, but only three seconds to realize his arms wrapped around me, too.

I pull back quickly and take two large steps back. "Uhm, yeah. Thank you so much for this!" I hold up the test and without another word, I hurry out the door and out of the school.

When I get to my car, I sit in it for a few seconds and then hit my hands against the steering wheel until they start to pulse.

_Stupid, stupid, stupid! What the hell was I thinking?! God, I'm so fucking stupid! I need to get over whatever stupid school-girl crush I have on him. He is my teacher! _

Part of me knows what I did was stupid and promises I won't ever do it again, but another part of me can't stop thinking about the fact that _he wrapped his arms around me_! He hugged me back! He didn't push me away or chastise me for hugging him; he put his arms around my waist and hugged me back!

Oh God, what the hell is with me?

* * *

**So, a lot of you seem to really want me to write from Tobias's point-of-view, so I'm more than likely going to write the next chapter from his POV. And if that goes well, I will write more from his POV, but I just find it easier to write from Tris's view. But I will definitely do my best to write from his view because I think that it could make the story longer and also allow for his reactions to everything. **

**But anyways, thank you guys SO much for the positive feedback, I really appreciate it!**


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

Tobias's POV

Tutoring Tris was a bit difficult at first. She was so stubborn to admit that she didn't know or understand something. I knew part of it had to do with the fact that she didn't want to seem less smart than I knew she was. And the fact that her Father held a political position may not make her feel any better about not understand American government.

After she started to feel more comfortable around me, her real self started showing itself. She was sweet and gentle and had a sense of humor. She also smiled more – I mean, I saw her smile during lunch because she was with her friends, but she rarely smiled during class.

I watched her take her test – well, struggle over her test. I knew she knew the answers, but the entire time she was writing, the frustration was evident in the little dent that appeared between her eyebrows.

Promising her I would grade her test first was one of the many things I would do to help her out as much as I could. I understand her position – overbearing parents – and I also understand why she was so stressed about it.

"Tobias?" There was a knock on the classroom door and I paused in the middle of grading Tris's test.

Looking up, I saw Jeanine Matthews standing in the doorway. I would say she's my boss, but she wasn't really – not in the literal sense. She was the principle of the school and so I did have to listen to her on certain things, but she didn't control my paycheck.

"Ms. Matthews, can I help you?" She steps into the classroom and crosses her arms over her chest.

"Actually yes, you can." She glances down at my desk and I flip the test face down and stand up. "Recently a former student has re-enrolled here and I need you do to me a favor." She steps in front of my desk. "I need you to keep an eye on him. He has a…troubled past and I just need you to make sure that he doesn't do anything wrong. Especially since I have a feeling he's going to try out for the lacrosse team…" She quirks an eyebrow.

I shake my head. "Try-outs are long over, we're practicing now. We have a game this Friday."

"I understand, but administration believes that if he is on a sports team, then he'll be less likely to act out."

Sighing, I run a hand through my hair. "And why does he need close monitoring?"

Jeanine smirks. "He dropped out after a few…problems with other students. He was known for fighting."

I'm about to question why he was even being allowed to re-enroll, when a small voice spoke up from the door. "Oh, I didn't realize you were busy…"

Jeanine turns towards her, a fake smile plastered on her face. I narrow my eyes at her and watch her as she leaves the class.

When I give Tris her test back, her entire face lights up and it's almost as if you can physically see the relief in her as she straightens up. Honestly, as a teacher, seeing a student _this _happy over a test, it was always worth the extra time in helping them.

And then she hugs me.

She wraps her thin arms around my back and I'm taken by surprise for a few seconds before I unconsciously wrap my arms around her. She's warm and small in my arms and for a few seconds, I completely forget that we're at school. I forget that she's my student and I'm her teacher.

Once Tris leaves, I lock the classroom door and then head to the gym to change into a pair of jeans and a black t-shirt.

I enter the gym and a majority of the team is standing around talking and stretching. I clap my hands together three times and cup my hands around my mouth. "Fifteen sets of lines. Go!"

Everyone starts to run and I walk towards the front of the gym and grab my clipboard, ticking off each person's name in attendance.

"Are you Mr. Eaton?" Turning my head, I see a kid with dark hair and freckles on his face. His narrowed eyes are watching the team run lines up and down the length of the gym. "Ms. Matthews said I would find you here. She said I could –"

I hold up my hand to stop him. "I know what she said." Turning to face him, I cross my arms over my chest and stare him down. "And I told her I'd let you be on the team. But just because you're on the team, does not mean you will play any games unless you can prove yourself."

"How do I prove myself?" He asks.

I jerk my head towards the team running the last few sets of lines. "Jump in for practice today. The last half hour we'll have a scrimmage and if you prove yourself, _maybe _you'll be allowed to play."

"I'm a senior, so does that mean I can try out for captain?" His green eyes sparkle with mischief.

Before I can turn that thought down, Will appears beside me. "Sorry, Peter, position's already filled." Will places his hands on his hips, his breathing heavy with exhaustion. "Get running." He orders. I can't help but feel slightly amazed by Will's sudden superior aura. Normally he's a friendly Captain and is fair, but there's something in his eyes – hatred? Anger?

Peter looked to me and I just shrugged. With a roll of his eyes, he headed towards where everyone was running and joined in.

"What's with that?" Will and I turn to watch Peter run. "You two hate each other?"

He scoffs and shakes his head. "Hate's too nice of a word. He was expelled for…multiple reasons and I'm pissed as hell that Ms. Matthews is actually letting him back."

I look over at Will, confused. "What happened?"

He takes a deep breath and rubs the back of his hand across his forehead, wiping off sweat. "He tried to sell two guys drugs – roofies, actually – and it was during school, which made it a hell of a lot worse."

"Wait, if he tried to sell _drugs _in _school_, he should have gone to jail."

"His Dad has a lot of money so he was able to get him off with expulsion and a year's probation." Will glares at Peter with utter hatred and fury. "It's bullshit." He looks at me. "You can't let him play on the team. It'll make us look bad."

I shake my head. "Matthews thinks this will be good for him. As long as he's on the team, she can't complain. She never said anything about him playing."

Will smirks. "We're having a scrimmage, aren't we?" When I nod, I can see a hint of his competitiveness flare up in his eyes, briefly diminishing some of the hatred – but there was still _a lot_ of hatred left. "Contact or no contact?"

Shrugging, I watch as the rest of the team starts to walk towards us. "I'm not really going to elaborate on that part."

Normally during a scrimmage I don't allow contact, but seeing Will's expression, I can't help it. He's always happy and I've rarely seen him angry in the few months I've known him. But this – this is not him and I think he needs to get it out of him.

I had the team run some drills and Peter joined in. I hated to admit it, but he wasn't half bad. Sure, he wasn't as good as the other seniors on the team, but he was better than the sophomores.

"Alright, line up. We're gonna have ourselves a scrimmage."

I split the teams up evenly and made sure to have Will and Peter on separate teams. Peter's team took the red jerseys and Will's team took the white ones.

The scrimmage would only last one match, but I knew Will would go hard on Peter – and a sick part of me wanted him to go hard. I didn't want some drug dealer on my team. He would make the team look incredibly bad.

I watched as Will ran straight towards Peter and knocked him to the ground. Peter got up and called time, but I shook my head. "There are no time outs during scrimmages."

"He hit me! He can't do that!" He yelled, angry.

"I never stated whether hitting was allowed or not and it was a clean hit. Time in!" I blew my whistle and watched as Peter hit his lacrosse stick on the gym floor, angry.

At the end of the scrimmage, Will's team won and Peter stomped over to me, angry. "You did that on purpose!" He tosses the lacrosse stick towards the bleachers. "You put us on separate teams! You _knew _he would hit me!"

"I didn't know what would happen, Peter. I split the teams up evenly. What happened, happened. If you don't like it, that sucks. Quit. But this is what happens during games, so if you want to be on this team, you better suck it up."

He stomped off towards the locker room and I sat in the gym, going over the set-up for tomorrow.

Once the team left, I was finally able to head home.

As soon as I got home, my phone started to ring. It was my close friend, Zeke. "What do you want Zeke?" Shutting the door behind me, I kick my shoes off in the hallway.

"Ring me up, it's cold and I'm waiting outside."

I toss my keys into a ceramic bowl on the kitchen counter. "I just got home. Why weren't you outside when I got here?"

"Because I just pulled up, jackass. Now let me up!"

I do and as soon as he's in the apartment, he plops down onto the couch in the living room. "Make yourself at home, why don't you?" I mumble, running my hand through my hair. "What do you want, Zeke?"

He shrugs, flicking through the channels until he finds a football game that's playing. "Nothing, I just wanted to hang out. You've been working a lot lately and I haven't seen or heard from you in a bit."

I sit down in an armchair and rest my elbows on my knees. "Yeah, well, I am a teacher. I kind of have to work every day during the week."

Zeke nods. "Got any classes with my little brother?" Zeke had a younger brother that was a senior, Uriah. I've met him only a few times when he was younger whenever Zeke and I hung out.

"No, but he is friends with some of my students and two of my senior lacrosse players."

"Well, just do me a favor and look out for him. Make sure he doesn't get into any trouble." I expected Zeke to have a joking expression, but it was completely serious. I nodded and promised him.

* * *

It was Friday night and I was in the locker room with the lacrosse team – who were all geared up and sitting in a large circle around me, shifting nervously. Well, all except Peter. He was leaning up against a locker, a sour expression plastered on his face and his lips pursed. I had told him that he'd be allowed on the team, but would be benched for a few games at the beginning of the season. Will was not happy with his being on the team, but my hands were tied.

After a quick pep talk, we left the room and headed outside onto the field. The other team was already warming up on the field, so I ordered the first two lines to start warming up. Peter and the new freshmen sat down on the bench.

I was talking to my assistant coach, Max, when I saw Tris walking up the bleachers with Christina hanging on her arm. I listened to what Max was saying while watching Tris.

The girls stopped by the team and Will and Al walked over to them. Christina and Will exchanged a quick kiss and Tris gave Al a warm smile. She had on a red and black lacrosse hoodie with a number on it – Al's number. Christina had on Will's number.

"Will, Al, let's go!" I called over to them. They both said their good-byes and I watched Tris as they walked over to the bench. Tris and I stared at each other for a few seconds before Christina pulled her away and I turned to face the game that was now starting.

* * *

**I know I chose a really crappy place to stop, but I just wanted to have this chapter up. It's been a bit since the last chapter and I apologize. I've had work and school stuff and I also didn't write for a few days because I couldn't think of anything to write. **

**But, yeah anyways, I think I'll write from Tobias's POV a little more often, but not a lot. I find it easier to write from Tris's POV, but I did enjoy switching it up. **


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five

"Tris, Christina's here!" My Mother yells up the steps as I'm applying black eyeliner to my eyelids. As soon as I was done, Christina bounces into my bedroom, a black and red hoodie draped over her arm.

I sighed. "You know you could've just waited downstairs, right?" She nods and shrugs.

"Yeah, but I figured you wouldn't want your parents to see me give you this." She hands me the hoodie and I give her a look. "It's Al's." There's a small, innocent smile playing at her lips and I want to groan.

Instead, I just cross my arms over my chest. "Christina, you know I love Al like a brother." But he doesn't realize that. "Wearing that will only give him the wrong idea." And it might also make Mr. Eaton think that I'm dating Al.

_Tris, stop it! _

"Just wear it. It's to support him and you can explain to him that it is _only _to support him and wish him luck and not because of your feelings for him."

I stare at the sweatshirt and then reluctantly take it from her and throw it on over a white t-shirt. After I pull on a pair of black combat boots, we head outside to Christina's car and then head to the High School for the game.

We arrived at the game right as both teams were warming up and my gaze instantly fell on Mr. Eaton. He was talking to a dark-skinned and dark haired man. I saw him look up at me for a second before going back to the man in front of him.

Christina pulled me down the bleachers until we were standing behind our team's bench. "Will!" She called to him. He looked over at us and he and Al jogged to stand below the bleachers.

"Hey, you guys made it." Will nods to me and then focuses on Christina. She leans over the railing to give Will a kiss. I smile at Al and he points to my sweatshirt.

"Is that mine?" He quirks an eyebrow and I can see a glimmer of hope in his eyes and I suddenly feel like shit.

Running my hand through my hair, I shrug. "Yeah, Christina thinks that if we wear your guys' things then we'll have a better chance of winning." Al nods and gives me a bright smile.

"Will, Al, let's go!" Mr. Eaton calls for them and with one more kiss for Christina, Will and Al turn and jog back over to the bench.

This time, Eaton's gaze stays focused on mine for a few moments until Christina pulls me up the stands to where Lynn, Marlene and Uriah are sitting.

Lynn and Marlene are sharing a large hot chocolate and large popcorn while Uriah is focused on talking to a group of guys behind him.

Marlene gives me and Christina a smile and then the game starts. I watch, barely able to keep up with what's going on, and occasionally focus on the back of Eaton's head. He's pacing up and down the team line, barking orders out to the team.

When he walks down to the right side of the team, I see a familiar name on a jersey. The guy is hunched over on the bench, his left leg bouncing – whether it's from nerves or annoyance, I can't tell. "Christina…" I tap her shoulder trying to get her attention. "Christina!"

I'm finally able to snap her out of her focus on Will's playing and she looks at me, annoyed. "What?"

Pointing to the figure on the bench, I look at her. "Does that last name seem familiar? And the hair?"

She narrows her eyes trying to get a better look, and then suddenly her mouth pops open loudly, grabbing Lynn and Marlene's attention. "Is that Peter? Are you fucking kidding me?! He's on the team?"

"He's back in _school_?" Marlene looks both shocked and disgusted.

Lynn shoots up from her seat like she's ready to go attack him. Marlene grabs her wrist, yanking her back down. "Lynn, sit down! You can't do anything about it!" Lynn continues to glare at the back of Peter's head, but does as Marlene says.

We all sit through the game until intermission. Marlene and Uriah head to the concession stand while Christina, Lynn and I head down to the field.

Christina grabs Will and Al's arms and yanks them both to the side. "What the hell is Peter doing on the team?" She demands, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Don't ask me, I voted for him to be kicked to the curb – and then have his head bashed in with a lacrosse stick." Will wipes a line of sweat off his forehead and looks back at Mr. Eaton. "Coach won't kick him off the team because Ms. Matthews demanded he be on it, but he's not going to let him play."

I roll my eyes. "Who cares if he's allowed to play or not? He's still on the team!" Looking over Al's shoulder, I see Mr. Eaton staring at his clipboard. I shove past the boys and stomp over to him, resisting the urge to kick Peter in the back of the head when I pass him.

He looks up when I approach him. "Tris, hey…"

"Can I speak to you?" Before he can answer me, I walk past the rest of the team so that nobody can hear us talk. I come to a stop and cross my arms over my chest, facing him. "Why the hell is Peter on the team?"

Mr. Eaton rubs the back of his neck with his hand and then shrugs. "Tris, I've already gone through this with Will. I can't control what Ms. Matthews wants. If it were up to me, he wouldn't be allowed to step _near _the field."

"I don't care what Ms. Matthews has to say!" I hiss. "He's a piece of shit and shouldn't even be back in school!" He looks slightly miffed by my use of language, but doesn't say anything.

He sighs and runs his hand through his hair. He looks over his shoulder at the team and then looks back at me. "You need to get off the field before you get in trouble."

I want to yell at him, but he's right – the game's about to continue and I can see Christina and Lynn looking at me. "Go back to your friends." I stomp off towards my friends.

We all headed back to our seats and the group of friends surrounding us doubled. We all continued to watch the rest of the game – with Christina gripping my arm tightly, her nails digging into my skin whenever Will hit someone or someone hit him.

"He'll be fine, Chris. Let go of my arm or else you're going to cut off my circulation." She gave me an apologetic smile and loosened her grip.

The game finished with our team leading 7-3. Everyone left as soon as both teams were off the field, but Christina and I lingered by the gym doors, waiting for Will and Al to come out.

Will and Al came out, talking loudly about a party that they were heading to. "Tris, aren't you coming?" Will asked, his arm draped over Christina's shoulders. "C'mon. First win of the season – we're going out to celebrate."

I shook my head. "No, I'm actually waiting for my Mom to pick me up." I lied. "I'll be fine." I really wasn't in the mood to go to a party – especially one where I knew a bunch of kids would be getting drunk.

Will and Christina started for their cars, but Al stayed behind. "Do you want me to stay and wait with you?"

I couldn't help but smile. "No, I'm okay. Really, you go on ahead with them."

"You sure?" He takes a step closer, his face filled with concern. "It's late and you really shouldn't be out here by yourself."

I smile. "Al, I'm fine. I promise." He nods and then turns to go. "Oh, and good job tonight. I saw you score three of those seven goals."

Al smirks and rubs the back of his neck. "Yeah, I think it had more to do with good luck than with my talent." He looks at my sweatshirt. "I think you helped with that." I pull the sleeves of my hoodie down so that they're covering my fists.

He takes a few steps forward and gives me a quick hug before Will's honking the horn at the curb. "Thank you, Tris." He says and then climbs into the car.

I watch them leave and suddenly feel terrible. I knew wearing Al's sweatshirt would give him the wrong idea.

"Well, look who it is." A familiar, annoying voice speaks up from the doors of the gym. "Beatrice Prior."

"Peter." I cross my arms over my chest and glare at him.

His smirk makes me want to slap him across the face. "I see you still have Big Al pining over you."

Pushing myself off the wall, I turn to face him. "What the hell do you want, Peter? Are you going to try and sell me drugs? Go right ahead, it'll give me a reason to call the cops and get you locked up."

I expected my comment to make him angry, but it only seemed to humor him. "Go ahead; think I can't get out of that situation again?"

Disgusted, I lean back against the gym door. "You're a real piece of shit, you know that?"

Before he can say anything, Mr. Eaton is pushing open one of the gym doors. He glances between us and then his gaze settles on Peter. His look of confusion turns into one of annoyance. "Peter, you need to leave. Now."

Peter gives me one more look before heading towards the parking lot.

Mr. Eaton turns towards me and the anger disappears from his face and a look similar to Al's earlier, takes over. "Are you okay?" He asks, placing his hand on my forearm.

I nod. "Yeah, I'm fine. Just…annoyed." When I realize his hand is still on my arm, I awkwardly shift out from under it.

"Are you sure you're okay? If Peter said anything…"

I shake my head. "Mr. Eaton…"

He holds up his hand. "Stop. We're not in school, please don't call me Mr. Eaton, it makes me feel old."

Staring at him, I try to read his expression. It's a mixture of humor and something else. "What should I call you then?"

"Outside of school you're allowed to call me Tobias."

I don't know what to say because I've never been told before that I can call a teacher by their first name. I mean, sure, I know a lot of my teachers' first names because it's on all their papers and emails and such. But having one tell you to call him by his actual name? It was weird. Not a bad weird, just…weird.

"Well _Tobias_, Peter was just being his usual shitty self. There's nothing to worry about." There's a large gust of wind and I wrap my arms around myself, trying to keep warm.

Tobias drops his gym bag onto the ground and takes off his black jacket and hands it to me. "Here, you must be freezing." I take the jacket, eyeing him carefully.

I was too tired and too cold to try and argue. It was way too cold for late September and his jacket was really, _really _warm. "Thanks." I mumble a thank you and he nods, picking his bag back up.

We stand in silence for a few minutes and he looks around. "Where are your friends?" His eyebrows knit together, like he's finally realizing they're not here.

"Oh, they left for a party before you got out here."

He quirks an eyebrow. "And you didn't go with them?" A group of guys around my age pass us and his gaze follows them until they're out of earshot. I shake my head and he asks, "Why not?"

Shrugging, I pull the jacket tighter around me. "Because I'm not really in the partying mood and I just…I didn't want to go when I knew there would be drinking." I quickly cover my mouth, feeling stupid.

Admitting that there's drinking at high school parties isn't that big of a surprise, but admitting that there's drinking at a party where his lacrosse team is currently at? That's a huge mistake. "You didn't hear me say that."

He laughs, shaking his head. "I'm not too concerned. I was in their shoes not too long ago." I roll my eyes and his face is suddenly serious again. "So do you have a ride home?"

Ah, shit. I didn't think about that when I turned down the party.

My expression must've given away my thoughts because he's gesturing for me to follow him. I stand still for a few seconds, debating whether or not to follow him.

I start to follow him, picking up my pace to keep up with him. "Look, I really appreciate the offer, but I don't really think it's…appropriate for you to drive me home."

We come to stop in front of a black Ford F150 and he tosses his bag into the bed of the truck. He walks around to the passenger side and rests his arm against the front of the truck. "You really think the school would want a female student waiting, alone, at almost eleven o'clock at night?"

I'm about to yell at him for assuming I wouldn't be able to take care of myself, but he's right. It is getting late and I'm not entirely comfortable waiting for one of my parents to come pick me up. Besides, that would probably just end up in a lecture about how I was irresponsible for waiting alone and not finding a ride sooner.

He helps me up into the passenger seat, a cocky smile on his face the entire time – a result of knowing he was right.

I buckle myself in as he pulls himself up into the driver's seat and I'm distracted by the sight of his arms flexing as he pulled himself into his seat and I'm remembering when I hugged him the other day and how sturdy he was.

The sounds of the truck starting startle me out of my little fantasy and I'm glad it's dark because my face feels hotter than it should be.

We pull out of the parking lot and head onto the main road. I give him basic instructions to my house and then it's silent in the car.

Finally, I can't take the silence any longer so I ask him, "Is there any specific reason you asked me to all you Tobias and not Mr. Eaton?" Turning to face him, I see his expression change when we pass under a street light.

"I'd rather not be called 'Mr.'. It makes me sound old, and I'm not ready to be deemed old." We stop at a red light and he turns to face me, a small smirk playing at his lips.

I quickly turn away from his gaze to hide the blush that undoubtedly is showing on my face. After I feel like the blush went away, I turn to face him again and his attention is back on the road. "That can't be the real reason. I mean, you're a teacher – obviously you knew that you'd have kids referring to you as 'Mr.' It couldn't have come as some big surprise."

He nods, turning down my street. "Yeah, but it's nice to have someone calling me by my real name – well, someone who I don't dislike."

I can't help but laugh. "You hate the other teachers?"

He shrugs and we pull up to the curb out front of my house and he kills the headlights, turning to look at me. "They're fine."

We both laugh and then it's quiet. I unbuckle my seat-belt and start to take his jacket off, but he shakes his head. "Keep it for now."

"I can't keep it. I don't know when I'll be able to give it back to you and it's not like I can just hand it to you during class – that'll look bad."

Even in the darkness I can see a knowing glint in his dark blue eyes and I pull the jacket sleeves over my knuckles, smiling. "I know." He gives me a soft smile and then nods towards my house. "You should get inside before someone wonders why there's a truck stationed out front of their house."

My stomach knots up at the sight of his humorous smile and I climb out of the truck, shutting the door quietly behind me.

"Thanks again." I'm standing on my tiptoes to look through the opened window and he smiles.

"No problem." The window rolls up. I wave to him and I barely see him nod his head before the headlights are back on and he's heading down the street.

I'm standing on the sidewalk, smiling like an idiot when I hear the front door open and I turn to see my Mom standing on the porch, her gray robe wrapped tightly around her. "Tris? Why are you standing there? It's cold, come inside." Her voice is sleepy and I hurry up the driveway, following her inside.

* * *

**Well, look how quickly I got this chapter up! I'm so inconsistent with posting chapters, it actually bothers me. But no worries, I'm starting to get to the point in the story that I want to be in and can start to get things going, so I'll have a lot more to write about. Maybe. I don't want to make any promises, though. **

**But I'm already working on the next chapter and it should be up within the next week if I'm not too busy. Hearing all the great reviews from you guys keeps me going, so I really appreciate it!**


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter six

To say things got awkward after that night would be an understatement. Tobias stopped our daily tutoring sessions after school, claiming that he had to practice with the lacrosse team more after they had won their first few games (because _that_ made sense) and that he'd pick them back up after Homecoming. And then during class, he would completely ignore any and every questions I had, making me have Christina ask them for me.

I was beyond frustrated and annoyed. I mean, yeah, we didn't really have a normal conversation that a student and teacher would have after hours. But that didn't mean that he had to be such an ass. Trying to confront him after school never worked out because he'd disappear after eighth period and I wasn't going to go back to his classroom every day or else the surrounding teachers would catch on to something.

Around the week of Homecoming, I finally decided to just completely give up. I stopped caring about focusing in class and instead doodled on my notebook and just zoned out the entire class period.

I stopped going to him with questions or trying to get in touch with him and I'm pretty sure he started to notice because I'd catch him looking at me in the cafeteria. But each time I caught him, his gaze drifted somewhere else and I was left irritated.

Finally, one day after the end of his class, I was packing up my bag and talking to Christina about our plans for Homecoming the following night.

She stood up from her desk, pulling her bag over her shoulders and grabbing her water bottle. "We can get ready at your place and then maybe go out to dinner after the dance? Because I mean, the small ass piece of pizza they'll undoubtedly give us won't suffice for my hunger." I laughed.

"Tris, can I speak to you for a moment, please?" Tobias's voice caught me off guard and I threw a nervous glance over at Christina, who shrugged and headed towards Will, to where he was waiting in the doorway.

Once they were gone, I turned my attention back to Tobias and crossed my arms over my chest. "So now I'm worthy of your attention?" I sounded bitter. Why did I sound bitter?

_Get it together, Tris._

He makes a face and then shakes his head. "I had a few…things to get settled." Placing a stack of papers down on his desk, he leans forward on his hands and looks at me. "I'm sorry if it came off like I was ignoring you."

"Cancelling all the tutoring sessions and never answering any of my questions during class. Yeah, no, it's a wonder why I ever thought you were ignoring me." If Christina were here, she would've high-fived me for my sassy answer, but the only reaction I got was an annoyed look from him. "Sorry." I quickly apologize and suddenly feel bad for snapping.

Refusing to acknowledge my comment, he then asks, "Do you want to continue with the tutoring sessions or would you like to end them?"

I lift my shoulders in a half-shrug. "I mean, I never really decided to stop them these past few weeks. You did. I would really like to keep them going so that way I don't, ya know, fail this class." _I also want to be able to see you more after school, away from all the other kids_.

He nods and pushes himself backwards. "We can start them back up tomorrow."

"I can't. I have to get ready for the dance tomorrow after school."

Crossing his arms, he glances towards the door and then me. "Would you be alright with meeting up on Saturday? Say, mid-afternoon?"

His question takes me by surprise and I almost gape at him, but am able to easily keep my mind in check. "Uhm, like…here?" I point towards the ground, but really mean the school.

Tobias laughs softly and shakes his head. "No, not here. There's a nice park down the street and I know Saturday is supposed to be decently cool out. Would that suffice?"

Nodding, I can't help but ask him, "Yeah, but I mean…is that allowed? A teacher and student to meet after school hours?"

"For tutoring? I can't picture the school throwing a fit over it." The look he gives me makes me hate myself for even bringing up the question. How could I be so stupid to ask him that? God, I really needed a filter for my brain – needed to think more, before I spoke. "Is around two o'clock good for you?"

I nod and then I leave his room and head down to the cafeteria.

The following day ends up going by pretty quickly - mainly because most of the teachers don't feel like doing much and also because a lot of people are excited for the Homecoming dance.

Christina and I left early, before lunch, so that we could get a head start on getting ready. I mean, it wasn't like it was prom or anything big like that, but we were seniors and we still wanted to look a lot better than the underclassmen.

We stopped by our favorite little restaurant to pick up some lunch and then we headed to a day spa to get our nails done. I had a black manicure to match my dress and a light pinkish color for my pedicure.

Once we were done with our nails, we headed back to my house and decided to kill some time by watching a movie.

Before the movie even started, Christina was already on me about a last minute date. "You really can't take Al? I know it'll mean a lot to him."

I roll my eyes, plopping down next to her on my bed, folding my legs underneath myself. "I realize it'll mean a lot to him, and that's why I can't do it. I saw how he looked at me when I wore his sweatshirt to the first lacrosse game – he'll read too much into it."

She eyes me carefully and then says, "Tell me who you like." A devilish smirk plays on her lips as I feel my face get hotter.

"What?!"

"Tell me who you like. Tris, there's been something different about you for a few weeks. Not anything completely noticeable, but there's this, I don't know, _gleam _in your eyes that I've never really even seen before."

I stare at her for a few seconds, trying to figure out whether she's joking or not. Once I realize she's being completely and totally serious, I can't help but laugh at how ridiculous she sounds. "You're so full of shit, Chris!" I wrap an arm around my stomach as I continue to laugh.

She crosses her arms over her chest and fixes me a stare. "I'm serious."

I stop laughing and can't help but feel slightly nervous. Should I tell her about the guy I like? Surely I can give her vague details about him without mentioning his name or how I know him.

No, I can't. Christina's incredibly smart and it's impossible to pull the wool over her eyes. I've known her almost my entire life and keeping secrets from her is not something I've ever been able to achieve. She figures things out incredibly quickly and honestly, I admire her for it.

"Can we please just watch the stupid movie?" I grab my TV remote and hit the PLAY button on it, starting _The Devil Wears Prada_.

The movie ends a little after five, which means that it's time for us to start getting ready for the dance.

Christina put her phone into my music dock and hit the 'play' button for one of her playlists and music started pouring through the speakers. She smirked at me and shook her small hips side-to-side.

I grabbed my curling iron and plugged it on, turning it on. While the iron heated up, I grabbed a few throw pillows from my bed and tossed them onto the floor, collapsing on top of them, crossing my legs pretzel-style. Christina sat behind me on my bed, her knees pressing against my back.

It took almost forty minutes to curl all of my hair perfectly and then to pin up small sections to keep my hair out of my face for the night.

After she was done my hair, I got to working on her hair. It didn't take too long because her hair was a lot shorter and thinner than mine. Once hair was done, we each started on our own makeup. I did a soft bronze on my eyelids, winged eyeliner and a pale lip stain. Christina, on the other hand, applied a gorgeous golden powder on her lids and red lipstick. I helped her with her winged eyeliner. The gold and red makeup popped against her dark, caramel skin and she never looked more beautiful.

I pulled on my dress, carefully not to mess up my makeup for curls, and then pulled on a pair of black tights.

"Honestly, I don't understand the point of you wearing tights." Christina remarked, nodding towards my tights as she pulled on her dress. "Show off your long legs!" I rolled my eyes and ignored her.

"It is cold as hell outside and I am not freezing my ass off to impress some immature guys with my legs." There was only one guy I wanted to impress, and I was pretty sure he wouldn't be here tonight.

But I get to see him tomorrow afternoon. The thought put a bubble of excitement in my stomach, making me smile.

Christina's dress was tight and stopped a little shorter than mid-thigh. It was a red that almost completely matched her lipstick and the gold shadow on her eyelids matched the gold sequins that lined her straps. Her outfit was finished with a pair of golden peep-toe heels. She was a solid ten and I was jealous.

"You know, I'm actually really glad you picked red heels to wear because you need color with that outfit." She stopped the music and took her phone out of the dock.

I was wearing the lace black dress that I had picked out when I ran into Tobias at the store, my tights were black and my nails matched my dress. Christina handed me my red heels and I thanked her, holding them in my hand. _I'm not risking a fall down the steps._

We headed downstairs to where my parents were waiting in the living room. They both stood up and my Mom broke into a large smile, covering her mouth with her hands. "Oh, don't you two look beautiful!" She kissed the side of my cheek and the hugged Christina tightly. "I just want to get two pictures of the two of you and then you guys can head out." My Dad stood behind her, his arms crossed over his chest, but a small smile on his lips.

_Click, click!_

My Mom told us we could go, and she gave me strict instructions to be back as soon as the dance was over.

"Mom, I'm sleeping over at Christina's, remember? I dropped clothes off at her place before we came here earlier." It wasn't a complete and total lie – I would be sleeping over at Christina's, but it was after we went out for food and then went to Will's party.

Her smile lessens, but it's still there. "Okay, just be careful. I love you, Beatrice." She gives me one more hug and then watches us walk to Christina's car.

When we get to the high school, Christina parks in the parking lot, and we start walking towards the second building – which has the gymnasium in it. There are teachers standing out front of the gym doors, holding the doors opened for students and welcoming us with fake, warm smiles.

We get in and give our tickets to one of the ninth grade teachers, and then we head into the gym where the lights are multi-colored and there's a DJ playing some music.

"Do you know where Will and everyone are supposed to be?" I had to raise my voice and lean as close to Christina as possible for her to understand me. She shrugs and we start walking towards the back.

Suddenly, I feel a pair of hands grab my waist and squeeze, causing me to squeal and turn around. Marlene's smiling brightly, her bright white teeth gleaming in the dark. She's in a frilly purple dress with different colored sequins adorning the top of it. Uriah's in a pair of dark jeans and a red button down. "Tris, you made it!" She yells and I nod, hugging her.

Lynn was walking up to us as I pulled back from Marlene. She was wearing tight leather pants, a tight red blouse and a pair of black high heels. "What happened to a dress?" I asked.

She shrugged, smirking. "I wasn't too into it." I smiled at her and gave her a tight hug.

"Well you look hot." Marlene speaks up, her arm resting on Uriah's shoulder. When I pull away from Lynn, I can see actual blush on her cheeks.

Al and Will appear, Will giving Christina a big kiss. Al gives me a polite smile and I return in, hoping that's all he'll do. He takes a step towards me and I frown. "Al…" I start to say, but then a figure appears to the left of me – a tall, bulky figure.

"Will, Al! I'm surprised to see you two here." I look to my left and see Tobias. He's wearing a pair of dark jeans and a nicely fitted gray sweater and it looks like he has some stubble on his face.

I can't help but stare at him – he looks good. I mean, _really _good.

Will's voice snaps me out of my daydream and I notice Tobias glance at me from the corner of his eye before looking back at Will. "Yeah, well. Chris kind of dragged me here and I can't say no to her." He wraps his arm around her waist and pulls her in, planting a kiss on her cheek. "What are you doing here? I thought you said you weren't coming."

He shrugs, crossing his arms over his chest. "One of the teachers couldn't chaperone and apparently I was next on the list."

A slow song comes on and there are a lot of groans from a lot of the students in the gym. Couples are starting to accumulate in the center of the gym floor and Christina's pulling Will away. I silently hope that he refuses, but like a boyfriend, he does what she wants.

Al turns to look at me, "Do you want to go dance?" There's a slight look of worry on his face, like he really doesn't want to dance. And I know he doesn't – he's never liked dancing.

Smiling, I shake my head. "I know you hate dancing, Al." He smiles at that. "And I'm fine." I lean against the wall, trying to relieve some of my weight off of my feet. My heels are already starting to cause pain and I just want to kick them off.

Al stands next to me for a few minutes before he sees some of his lacrosse buddies and heads towards them, leaving only myself and Tobias.

I look up at him to see him looking at me already. Giving him a small, shy smile, I look at the ground.

"You look nice tonight." He says and I can't help but look up at him, startled. He's smiling, but he sounded sincere. "I mean it, you do." He rubs the back of his neck with his hand, and I notice that it's something he does a lot when he talks to me.

My face feels warmer and I know, without a doubt, that my cheeks are red and I hate it. "Thanks."

When the slow song ends, Christina comes running towards me.

_Honestly though, how the hell does she run in heels?_

"Hey, so Will needs to leave early to set up for his party and I was going to go with him. You okay with leaving the dance a little early?" She flashes a pleading smile at me and I can't help but glance over at Tobias, who suddenly looks serious.

Finally, I nod. "Yeah, that's fine. When are we leaving?"

Will is heading towards the back of the gym where Al is standing with some of the lacrosse players. "Now." She gives me a guilty look, and while normally I'd be pissed she's making me leave the dance early, I'm actually kind of relieved. Leaving early and heading to Will's would mean that I get to change out of my heels and into some comfortable shoes.

"Okay." And with that, she's heading to where Will is to let him know and I turn to face Tobias, but he has his back to me and it looks like he's writing something on the wall.

When he turns around he steps close to me and holds out the slip of paper. I take it carefully, almost as if it'll hurt me. "What is this?" I flip it over and it's a set of numbers. A phone number.

I'm even more confused when he says it's his. "Why are you giving me your number?" I knew that was something that was frowned upon by the school.

He rolls his eyes, his face still serious. "I haven't been out of high school _that _long, Tris. I know what goes on during those parties and I'm just looking out for you."

I wanted to question him more but Christina, Will and Al appeared just then and I crumpled up the piece of paper, holding it tightly in my fist. "Ready to go?" Christina asked, and I nodded, giving her a forced smile.

"Ready."

* * *

**Alright, so this was a lot longer that I planned on it being and I was going to continue, but I figured I could basically make this part 1 and the next chapter part 2. I'm also pretty sure I'm going to be writing from Tobias's POV again very shortly, as some of you apparently liked that. **

**But yeah! Thanks for all the positive feedback, it really helps and makes me smile.**


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven

"So you're parents really don't mind you throwing this party?" I ask Will and he shrugs, grabbing two bowls full of chips and hands one to me. We walk over to the table full of food and set them down.

"They're both gone for the weekend and s long as the party doesn't get too big and the cops don't show up, they're not too worried." He flashes a devious smile and looks straight at the cases of alcohol sitting on the floor under the table of food. "Which is why I have you and Christina here." I make a face at him. "For some odd reason, a number of kids here are scared of you two. Well, mainly Chris." He looks over his shoulder, towards his girlfriend, who was currently talking to Marlene.

I smile. "I can see why."

More people start to arrive a little after ten, a majority of them coming straight from the Homecoming dance. As more people crammed into Will's house, the more I stayed near Christina, Al and Lynn. Uriah and Marlene were off in the kitchen, most likely eating a bunch of the food.

Around eleven, Lynn elbows my side and nods towards the front door. "What the hell is he doing here?" She hisses.

I follow her glare and see Peter, with a sly smirk on his face, walking straight towards the alcohol. "I don't know, but he's sure as hell not staying."

Grabbing Christina's arm, I pull her towards where Peter is flirting with some tipsy blonde girl, who was definitely not from our school. "Well, well, well. Look who it is." He smirks and tears his eyes from the blonde.

"You need to leave. Now." Christina's tone leaves no room for arguments or fighting. But with Peter, it's like talking to a brick wall.

He shakes his head, pushing himself away from the girl, who stumbles off. "I think I'm going to stay for a bit."

Will appears, placing the palm of his hand against Christina's lower back. "I didn't invite you, Hayes. So you either need to leave or I will gladly call the police."

"Oh, and risk them coming home to a party with a ton of alcohol and underage drinkers?" He quirks an eyebrow. "You really think I won't be able to get out of that situation scotch-free?"

His snide comment makes me really want to punch him square in the nose, but I can't do that. I glance over my shoulder and see Lynn standing by the far wall, glaring at him, and I know for a fact that if she were standing next to me, she would've hit him multiple times by now.

I shake my head, crossing my arms tightly over my chest. "You are such a piece of shit, Peter."

"Is that really the only name you can call me? I guess it really is true that blondes are dumb. I mean, that's why you're having Eaton tutor you, isn't it?"

I straightened up and dropped my hands to my sides, my hands curling into fists. Christina notices and grabs my arm, pulling me away from Peter. "Tris, let it go. Will's going to take care of him."

She grabs two bottles of flavored wine coolers and hands me one. "Drink. And calm down." I untwist the cap and down about three-fourths of the bottle before Christina realizes it and yanks it from my hands. "Okay, I meant calm down – not get drunk on a single wine cooler in a matter of seconds."

"It's not really possible." I joked and she chuckled, shaking her head.

She stands up and takes my hand. "C'mon, I know something that'll cheer you up." I stand up and follow behind her as she pushes past people and heads down the basement steps.

In the basement, there's a long table set up with cups on both sides and a handful of kids on either side.

"Beer pong, really?"

She shrugs. "It'll cheer you up, and hey, you get to drink during the game. It's a win-win scenario."

I don't argue with her, instead, I stand next to her while the group ahead of us finishes up their game. Once they're done, we get new cups and fill them up with a fruity, sorbet drink – Christina reassured me that there's alcohol in it, and after my first sip of it, the alcohol is overwhelming.

After a few really crappy misses and more sips of the drink, I started to feel a lot calmer and my head was fuzzy. Fortunately, I wasn't as bad as Christina. She was really bad at this game and she had trouble walking straight by the end.

Will came downstairs and when he saw her, he frowned. "How much did she drink?"

I shrugged, giggling. "I don't know, but she's really bad at beer pong."

Will shook his head and wrapped an arm around her waist. "I'm going to go put her in my room. You going to be okay?" He asks. I nod and run a hand through my hair.

"Yeah, I'm just…I'm gonna go out front for some fresh air."

I trail behind Will as he carries Christina up the steps and then I head out the front door. The rush of cold air makes me dizzy and I stumble to the porch steps, holding onto the railing as I sit down on the top step.

I take my phone out of my pocket and unlock it. I really want to call my parents to come pick me up, but I know that doing that will only result in being punished for drinking and lying.

Someone sits down next to me and I turn to see Al. "You okay?" I nod, closing my eyes and lean my head against the railing. "Do you need a ride home?"

I look at him and then shake my head. "I'm pretty sure you've had just as much as me." I hiccup and groan. "It's really not a good idea." He sits there for a few more minutes before someone calls his name and he gets up and heads back inside.

Looking down at my phone again, I open up my contacts and go to the one number that doesn't have a name. My thumb hovers over the call button as my muddled brain tries to think of a reason _not _to call.

I press my phone to my ear, chewing on the pad of my thumb. It rings a few times and I'm suddenly worried that he won't pick up. On the fourth ring, however, a groggy voice answers. "Hello?"

Something in my stomach twists and I don't know if it's because of his voice or the fact that I feel like I'm going to throw up. "Tobias…"

"Tris?" He sounds confused for a second and then suddenly sounds worried. "It's almost one in the morning, are you okay?"

"Uhm, yes and no." I hiccup again and my stomach twists even more. Yep, definitely going to be sick. "I want to go home but I have no ride."

"Where are you? I'll come pick you up."

Suddenly I feel like it isn't a good idea to tell him where I am, but at the same time, I don't want to be here while everyone else is getting drunk. So I gave him Will's address and he just simply told me to stay put and he'd be there in ten minutes.

A few minutes later, a familiar black truck pulls up and Tobias jumps out. I'm surprised he's not worried about anyone seeing him, but then it dawns on me that everyone's inside and I'm the only one out here.

"Tris." He breathes a sigh of relief as he extends his hand out to me. "Come on." I take his hand and stand up, slightly unsteady on my feet. Everything around me kind of spins and I stumble forward. "Careful now." His arms go around my waist, holding me up and while it feels nice, I can feel my lunch coming up.

Pushing away from him, I turn towards the bushes and lean over them, getting sick. "Shit." I hear Tobias cuss, grabbing my hair to hold it away from my face.

When I'm done, I stand up and rub the sweat off my forehead. "You okay?" He finally asks. I wait a few seconds and then nod. "Come on, we should get going." I let him lead me to his truck and don't put up a fight when he lifts me into the passenger's seat.

He climbs into the driver's seat and I roll down my window a little bit, relishing in the cold breeze. "Don't get sick in my truck, please." I know he means it as a joke, but I can't help but feel like he's making fun of me. He glances over at me and sighs. "I'm kidding…"

I stay silent until I notice he's turning down my street. "What are you doing?" I panic, turning to face him.

"Taking you home?" He gives me a face. "I thought that was what you wanted?"

I shake my head quickly, my stomach churning, but this time it wasn't from feeling sick. "No! No, no, no, no! No, I can't go back to my house. My parents will freak out. They'll know I was drinking and they'll know I was lying. Please, do not take me home."

Tobias pulls over to the curb and kills his headlights. He shifts in his seat and looks at me. "Well where am I supposed to take you?"

Shrugging, I pull my legs up into my chest on the seat. "I don't know, but just…please don't make me go home."

He sighs and runs his hand through his cropped hair, looks at me for a few more seconds and then turns back around in his seat. "Fine." Is all he says before he turns the headlights back on and turns around, leaving my street behind.

Fifteen minutes later he pulls into a parking garage in an apartment building. "Where are we?" I ask as I carefully slide down and out of the truck.

"My apartment." He jumps down from the truck and locks it. I walk around to where he's waiting for me and then we head towards the elevator. Once we're in the elevator, I sag against the wall.

The ride up is silent and once we come to a stop, I follow behind Tobias. He stops outside of a room, 4C, and unlocks it, stepping inside to hold the door open for me.

I step inside and he locks the door behind me. The apartment is decently sized – a modern kitchen, a large plasma screen TV hanging on the far wall with a large, black L-shaped couch in front of it. There are three rooms off of the living room, one of which I presume to be his bedroom and the small, white room to be the bathroom.

"If you need to take a shower, you can. Bathroom's right through there." I turn to see Tobias sitting on the couch, leaning forward on his elbows.

I wrap my arms around myself, and look down at the hardwood floor. "I would but, uhm, I don't…I don't have any other clothes." I was still in my Homecoming dress and tights and there was absolutely no way I would be taking a shower only to get back into the same outfit I've been wearing all night.

He pushes himself up off the couch and heads into his room. When he emerges, he has a white t-shirt and a pair of black drawstring shorts. He hands them to me and then heads back to the couch.

After my shower, I fold up my dress and leave it on top of the hamper in the bathroom. I head back into the living room and Tobias is placing a bunch of sheets on the couch and some pillows. Without turning to face me, he simply says. "You can sleep in my room. I'll take the couch."

I'm too tired to argue and I feel like he suddenly hates me. I mean, why else would he refuse to look at me?

His bed is king sized with navy blue cotton sheets. I climb under the blankets and try to focus on the silence in the room, but my head won't shut up. All I can think about is the fact that I am wearing Tobias's clothes while in his apartment _in his bed_.

I don't know what time it was when I fell asleep, but all I know is that when I woke up, I felt like complete and total hell. My head hurt, my stomach was churning even though it was completely empty and I could barely recall as to where the hell I was.

Sitting up, I run my fingers through my tangled bed-head and look around the room. I remember briefly calling Tobias last night, then him picking me up, my breaking down and begging him not to take me back to my house. I guess he decided to bring me to his apartment.

Looking to my left, there's a glass of iced water and some Tylenol on the bedside table. I swallow the pills and chase it down with half the glass of water.

The bedroom door opens slightly and Tobias peaks his head in. "You're awake, good." He steps into the room and then lowers himself on the edge of the bed. "How are you feeling?"

"Embarrassed, mortified. Take your pick." I cover my face with my hands. "God, I'm such an idiot."

"I'd be lying if I said you were an idiot." He says. Normally I'd glare at him and defend myself, but I can't. There's no defending when it comes to what I did last night. I very rarely went to parties and even when I did, I never drank as much as I did last night. God, how could I be so reckless?

I drop my hands down to my lap and look up at him. "I'm sorry about this. I really shouldn't have called you." I can add that to the list of dumbass mistakes I made last night.

"Honestly, I'm kind of glad that you did call me." He starts to explain himself after I give him a face. "Tris, I'm not ignorant as to what goes on during high school parties, it's pretty self-evident. And I would rather you have called me than you drink even more and had someone who had been drinking try to take you home."

We sat in silence for a few moments before he stands up off the bed. "There's breakfast in the kitchen. You should eat."

My stomach twists at the mention of food and I wrap my arms around my stomach, shaking my head. "Yeah, no. I don't think I'm in the mood to eat right now."

He rolls his eyes and crosses his arms over his chest. "You threw up last night and more than likely got rid of all the food in your stomach. When was the last time you ate?"

I think for a few seconds and then look at him, a guilty look on my face no doubt. "Yesterday…at lunch." I mean, I picked on food at Will's party but it was only chips and pretzels, so it wasn't anything big.

"And that's why you feel sick. C'mon, you gotta eat." He leaves the room and I follow after him. I'm still in the shorts and t-shirt he gave me last night and they're both slightly big on me.

In the kitchen, there's a plate of scrambled eggs, bacon, and toast and a large glass of orange juice. I give him a mumbled 'thank you' before sitting down at the table with the food. I eat slowly, afraid that eating too fast will cause all the food to come right back up.

Tobias disappears into the bathroom for a few minutes and I finish up eating. Once I'm done, I wash my plate off and put it in the dishwasher.

I sit down on the couch, crossing my legs underneath myself and turning the television on. I flip through the channels trying to find something decent to watch. There's an episode of Criminal Minds on, so I decide to keep that on. It at least gives me something to watch.

"Tris." I jump at the sound of Tobias's voice, unaware that he had even left the bathroom. He's standing behind the couch in a pair of dark blue jeans and a simple white t-shirt. "You're phones been ringing; might want to answer it." He tosses it over to me and I catch it, reading the screen.

_10 missed calls._

Sighing, I unlock my phone and see that they are all from Christina. I tap on her name and put the phone to my ear. I get up off the couch and walk towards the bathroom, shutting the door behind me.

"Tris! God, I've been trying to get a hold of you all damn day. Why haven't you been answering? Where are you?" For someone who drank a hell of a lot more than I did, she sounds completely fine. Then again, she probably had a bunch of food in her stomach.

"I'm fine, Chris. I left the party early last night. I got a ride from…from my brother. He was in town for the night." It was the best and only lie I could think of. All of our friends were at the party and more than likely slept over at Will's, so it wasn't like I could just say one of them took me home.

She lets out a breath of relief and I can hear her talking to someone else – probably Will. "Are you grounded? Did Caleb tell your parents?"

Running my hand along the granite bathroom counter, I laugh. "No, he didn't tell. I have too much stuff I know about him that could get him cut off from my parents. But I can't hang out today."

"What? Why?" Her voice is high pitched and I smile.

"Because I have plans already."

She laughs loudly on the other end. "Do I get to hear about these…plans?" I can almost hear the quotation marks she put around plans.

"No, because there's nothing to tell. It's just…a study session." She tells me to call her as soon as I get done the session and I promise her that I will. Hanging up the phone, I head back into the living room.

"Everything okay?"

Nodding, I run my hand through my hair. "Yeah, everything's fine."

* * *

**So I've been getting a few comments recently about the age difference between Tris and Tobias and how it's illegal for a minor to be in a relationship with an adult, especially a teacher. And i realize that, but that's the whole point of the story. And to make it a little more clear, Tobias is 26 in the story and Tris is 17 going on 18. **

**While I appreciate the comments, I'm a little concerned as to those who are commenting about the age differences and legality of the situation. The whole point of the story is for it to be a "forbidden romance" type thing. I'm still at the beginning stages of the story and I still have a bit of a ways to go before I actually get the two involved. **

**I mean, let's be real. A lot of people love the whole teacher-student relationship drama. Just look at Pretty Little Liars with Ezra and Aria. Or Vampire Academy with Rose and Dimitri. **

**But I really do hope that the whole situation doesn't turn people away from reading this and continuing to read it. I thought it'd be a fun type of story to write. **


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter Eight

Tobias didn't really try and push to find out who I was talking to on the phone and I was thankful for that.

I took a seat on the couch, closer to Tobias than I originally had been seated, and we sat in silence for a few moments before I looked up at him. "I, uhm, just want to say thank you. For last night and this morning."

He nods, shrugging. "It's not a problem, honestly. I'm just happy that you didn't do anything stupid."

Again, I know I should be offended at him basically calling me stupid, but I'm still extremely curious as to why he decided he would suddenly be concerned for my well being. "I just need to know one thing, though." He looks up at me, raising an eyebrow. "Why are you being so…I don't know, _protective_, of me? I mean, I can understand your concern with my irresponsible drinking, but any other adult would've taken me straight home to deal with the consequences of my actions. Why didn't you?"

He stares at me and I can see in his eyes that he's searching for an answer – the right answer. "I don't know." He finally answers. "You're one of my students and I'm worried about your safety."

Shaking my head, I can't but give him a small humorless laugh. "That's not the real reason, and you know it."

Dropping his hands to his lap, he turns to face me. "What do you want me to say, Tris? What answer do you want from me?"

"I just want a real answer. I can see that you're lying and all I want is the truth, Tobias." When he doesn't answer me, I stand up. "Fine, I'll leave then." I stand up and start to turn away, but Tobias grabs my wrist, pulling me backwards.

"Stop it. Don't…don't leave."

"Then just tell me the truth!"

His grip loosens slightly but he remains holding my wrist. "I just…feel like I need to protect you."

I give him a face, offended. "What? I can't defend myself?"

"I know you can defend yourself, but I just…I feel like I can't be away from you. There's a…pull." He says, with a roll of his eyes.

"A pull?" I feel like there's a ton of butterflies in my stomach, flying around. His words do something to me and I want to smile, but I keep my expression neutral.

He lets go of my wrist altogether, but I take a step towards him. "A pull like…like you can't stay away from me?" He nods, looking slightly panicked. I guess I could understand why he was panicked. I mean, he had just admitted to having some type of feelings – feelings that he shouldn't have because of his position – for me.

Part of me knows that this is bad and that I should leave right away, but another part of me wants to stay here – wants to touch him.

I reach my hand out towards his and twist my fingers through his. "Tris…" he sighs, staring at our hands. "This isn't right." His fingers tighten their hold on my hand and I bite the inside of my cheek, trying to hold back a smile. I move my free hand up his arm and place it over where his heart is. I can feel the pulse on my palm and look up at him, a small smile playing at my lips.

He grabs my hand, his thumb brushing over the top.

Without thinking, I do the dumbest and most idiotic thing I can do – I kiss him. I stand up on my toes to reach him and press my lips to his.

I expect him to pull back suddenly and to deny me, but he doesn't. Not right away, at least. The hand that is holding my hand to his chest moves towards my elbow and draws me closer to him. Tobias's lips are crushed against mine and I have a feeling that he still hasn't realized what is happening.

And then he pulls away, completely dropping my hands and taking a step backwards. He runs his hands through his hair, gripping the roots. "That was inappropriate. Actually, that's not even close to the word I need to use to describe it."

"Wow. Thanks."

Tobias turns to face me again, dropping his arms to his side with a loud slap. "That's not what I meant. I meant that we," he motions between us, "can't happen. It can cause a lot of problems. You don't deserve to be involved in that."

"But you feel something for me."

He nods. "Yeah, I do. But Tris, it can't happen. You're still in high school. Maybe things would be different if you were graduated or a few years older."

I sit down on the edge of the couch, running my hand through my hair, frustrated. I feel the couch shift with his weight as he sits down beside me, and his knee brushes the side of my leg.

When I look over at him, he's staring down at his clasped hands. "This was stupid of me. Tutoring was one thing – but everything after that was…a huge mistake."

I kind of feel like I was slapped across the face, but I couldn't help wondering why the hell I was so devastated over this. I mean, yeah, I knew I had some feelings for him but I didn't think they were reciprocated.

Looking back up at me, his face drops. "Tris…" Without another word, his hands cup both sides of my face and he's suddenly kissing me; his lips both firm and soft at the same time.

My hands drop to grip his forearms and I feel like something's bubbling in my chest. "Tobias…" I say his name like a sigh of relief and he wraps one arm around my waist.

But when he pulls me closer, it's like he can finally think straight and his arm loosens from around my waist and he gently pushes me away from him. "I'm sorry, Tris." He's on his feet and walking away from me towards the windows. "We can't…this can't be a thing. You're still in high school, you're my _student_."

"I know." There's a hint of disappointment in my voice and he turns to face me and I can see that sadness written all over his face.

He rubs his face with the palms of his hands, frustrated. "Look, Tris, I like you – and I know it's incredibly stupid of me to like you, but I do. But we can't…be together. Not now, anyways."

"Fine," I shrug, standing up from the couch. "I'll leave then."

Tobias doesn't try and stop me, he just watches me as I head into the bedroom to change back into my clothes from last night. I really don't want to go home in the same clothes as last night, but I really don't have a choice.

Once I'm back in my dress and tights, I sit on the edge of Tobias's bed, putting my shoes back on. My eyes sting, like I'm on the verge of crying, and I bite the inside of my cheek to keep myself from crying. I don't need Tobias to see me crying over him.

I sit on the bed for a few minutes longer until there's a light knock on the door and he peeks his head in. I quickly wipe the tears from my eyes before he can see them.

"Can I talk to you? Before you go, I mean?"

Shrugging, I cross my arms over my chest.

He takes my silence as a 'yes', and comes to sit down next to me, further away than I really wanted him to sit.

He takes a deep breath before he starts talking. "I didn't mean to hurt you, Tris. I'm serious. I really do like you and – okay, look, I've never been in this kind of position before and I don't know how the hell to navigate around it."

Rolling my eyes, I cross my leg over the other and mumble, "I'll say."

A heavy silence sits in the room, neither of us speaking. Truthfully, I didn't know what to say to him. Obviously I had feelings for him and obviously I wanted some kind of relationship with him, but it was practically impossible. I take this time to look at him – the stubble that was starting to cover his face, the taut outline of his jaw and the deep blue of his eyes. Staring at him, a knot formed in my stomach and I wrapped my arms around my stomach, like it would help uncurl the knot.

Finally, I stand up and smooth down the back of my dress. "I'm going to leave now, since you're very clearly done speaking to me about this…issue."

Once again, he doesn't say a word so I don't have any other reason to stay behind. I shut his apartment door behind me and take a deep breath. My hands are starting to shake so I clench them into fists and head down the steps.

* * *

"I mean, it's kind of ridiculous the shit he gets away with!" Christina collapses onto her stomach on my bed next to me. I'm lying on my back, staring up at my ceiling. Apparently after I had left last night, Peter had stayed longer and had actually sold some ecstasy to some junior guys. Will had caught him and ended up getting into a fight, which caused a huge problem. Thankfully Christina, Marlene and Uriah had gotten it settled before any cops showed up. "And I mean, yeah he kicked Peter's ass, but it wasn't like he could just call the cops – there was a shit-ton of alcohol at a party with underage kids."

Shaking my head, I glance over at her. "We could always send an anonymous tip to Ms. Matthews. I mean, he _is _still technically on probation."

Christina sighs, rolling herself onto her back to stare at the ceiling. "You think I haven't tried that? God, I just want to graduate already and get the hell out."

Nodding, I can't stop thinking about Tobias last night and earlier today. I wanted to tell Christina everything that happened and get her input on what the hell I should do. But I couldn't. I didn't know how she would react and I couldn't risk getting him in trouble – I didn't want him to get in trouble and stop trusting me.

"Can we go do something? I need to get my anger out somehow and I don't think you'd appreciate it very much if I punched you." I laughed, rolling my eyes.

Turning my head to face her, I give her a mock look of seriousness. "We should go tepee Peter's house." She shoves me playfully and we both laugh.

Sighing, I place my hands over top of my stomach.

"What's wrong?" Christina asks, catching me slightly off guard. I shrug and she gives me a face, pushing herself up onto her elbow to look at me. "Tris, I know you just as well as I know myself – there's definitely something wrong. I can see it in your face."

God, I want to explain everything to her _so badly_. What kind of friend am I, keeping her out of my personal life? I can trust her, and I know I can. Christina has always been there for me no matter what and even if she did think what was happening – or happened – between me and Tobias, she wouldn't judge me.

Would she?

Taking a deep breath, I turn to face her and give her the best fake smile I can manage. "There's nothing wrong. I promise."

* * *

**I am so sorry that this took so long to get up and that it's so short! I've been extremely busy and haven't had too much time to write, and honestly - i just wanted to get something up for you guys so nobody thought that i was giving up on the story. I'm not! I'm very much excited to continue writing this and keep going! **

**But thank you all for your positive feedback and comments! It really means a lot!**


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter Nine:

Weeks passed and no other incidents occurred. Mainly because Tobias refused to acknowledge my presence and he emailed me to cancel the tutoring sessions, promising that he would find a replacement for me soon enough. He actually _emailed me_. He didn't even have the courage to tell me in person.

Thankfully I had a ton of other things to stress out over that Tobias was in the very back of my mind, at least until I had free time. Deadlines for most of my college applications were coming up quick; I had re-taken the SATs and now was finishing filling out my application for Brown.

My Mom was more than helpful when it came to filling out applications. She understood that I really, really wanted to go to Brown University the falling autumn, but she also reminded me that I needed safety colleges. She gladly took me out of school – for which I was thankful to avoid seeing Tobias – so that we could go visit campuses nearby. Each time I went to talk to an admissions counselor, she would look at me with a smile so bright and proud, her face could have frozen.

For the first time in a very long time, I felt like I was finally making my parents proud. I mean, obviously parents were excited when their kids were getting ready for college, but living in Caleb's shadow my whole life I felt like I could never amount to anything.

School didn't really make any of the stress easier. Teachers were constantly reminding us over the upcoming application deadlines and trying to help prepare us for after high school.

Honestly, it was both annoying and exhausting.

One Friday, after school, Christina and Will, Al, Uriah and Marlene, Lynn and I were all crowded around Will's Jeep. The parking lot was starting to clear out, but we were sitting back for a few extra minutes.

It was the last day before winter break and I couldn't be happier. We had a good three weeks off which meant three weeks I would go without having to see or talk to Tobias.

It also meant that I had a good three weeks to hang out with Christina and Will and Al.

But tonight, my brother was coming home for Christmas and my parents both wanted me home for the night so that we could all go out to dinner and have a family night. Not exactly my cup of tea.

"You can't just ditch this dinner tonight?" Christina asks, lying on my bed, watching me go through my closet looking for a decent outfit for tonight.

Shaking my head, I shift through my sweaters. "Sadly, no. I mean, it is Caleb so obviously my parents want me there to make sure he knows that he's better than I am and also so that he can probably rub his success in my face."

Christina's nose scrunches up in distaste and I can't help but laugh. Then, causing me to jump, a voice speaks up from my doorway, "Well I mean, somebody in the family has to brag."

Caleb's standing my doorway, all six-three of him. His hair is ruffled and there are melting snowflakes on his jacket collar and in his hair. The same child-like smirk plays at his lips and I can't help but smile and throw my arms around his neck. Yeah, he's an ass at times and I hate living in his shadow, but he's my brother and I love him.

He pushes me back and nods to Christina, who waves. "Hey, Chris."

"'Sup, Caleb?"

Running my hands through my hair, I take a step back and look at him. "When did you get in? I thought you wouldn't be here until later tonight. Mom and Dad said we'd be meeting you at the restaurant for dinner."

He shrugs, leaning against the door frame. "Flight was early and Mom really wanted to have some time to spend with Susan." Ah, Susan. The esteemed girlfriend who may or may not be a long-time thing with him.

I can't lie – I'm a bit jealous of his relationship. Susan was our neighbor when we were children and when it came to Caleb's junior year, he started hanging out with her a lot more and talked about her a lot. When he had his Junior Prom, he asked her and apparently in doing that, it sparked their relationship and they began dating shortly afterwards.

"So have you heard from Brown, yet?" When I shake my head, his smile disappears and a look of concern replaces it. "Well, there's still time. You'll definitely get an acceptance letter from them soon."

Just like my parents, Caleb knew how much Brown meant to me and how much I needed to go there.

Caleb leaves to go be with our parents and Susan, meanwhile Christina and I stay in my bedroom while I'm still trying to find an outfit.

I finally settle on a pair of black skinny jeans with a cream colored sweater and a pair of black combat boots. Christina and I relax for a little while longer before she leaves so that I can start getting ready for dinner.

Everyone was apparently waiting on me, because when I get downstairs they all have their jackets on and are standing by the front door. My Mom hands me my jacket and I thank her, giving her a warm smile.

I greet Susan and everyone heads out to the car. On my way out, I spy an envelope addressed to me with _Brown University _written in the top left corner. My stomach drops and I suddenly feel like throwing up.

Forcing myself to move, I follow behind everyone and climb into the back seat of the car.

Dinner goes by extremely slowly, my leg jiggling under the table the entire time. All I can think about is the letter on the table by the door. It was a _letter_, not a packet. Every time I thought about that, I panicked and felt like I was going to throw up my dinner in front of the entire restaurant.

Matters were made worse when all anyone wanted to talk about was Caleb's life since the last time we saw him. My parents asked him about his job, what his new (fancy!) apartment was like in the city and how he and Susan were getting along.

Susan was quietly observant, blushing at moments when Caleb talked about their relationship. She was always a reserved person, but it seems like she's gotten slightly less loose since high school.

It was around ten-thirty when we got back home. Mom and Dad said goodnight to Susan and Caleb, kissed me on the forehead and headed to bed. Caleb and Susan decided to watch a movie together. I, on the other hand, was too keyed up about the letter to do anything.

Waiting until everyone left the front room, I grabbed the letter and shoved it in my pocket. I didn't know what I was going to do or who I wanted to open it with. Definitely not my parents, no.

Pulling out my phone, I faked a call, pressing the phone up to my ear. "…Chris, calm down!" I spoke slightly louder than I needed to, but I had to make sure Caleb would hear me. "Okay…okay! I'll be over in a few minutes." Shoving my phone in my pocket, Caleb poked his head out from the kitchen.

"Everything okay?"

Shaking my head, I grabbed the keys to my car. "No, Chris and her boyfriend broke up. She's devastated and I need to be there for her. I might be there all night, I'm not sure. If Mom or Dad ask, can you tell them where I went?"

He nods and without another word, I'm out of the house and in the car.

Twenty minutes later, I'm standing in front of a door that I never really saw myself standing in front of again. And I'm not sure whether I want to knock or turn around, leave and go to Christina's.

But I can't go to her. I don't want to. I know how she'll pity me and act if I open the letter and it is a rejection letter. I don't want her telling me how stupid Brown is for not accepting me and how there are better schools out there for me. I don't want pity.

I knock.

Tobias opens the door and looks as surprised as I feel. "Tris? What are you doing here? It's late."

Looking down at the floor, I reach into my pocket and pull out the letter, my hand shaking. I look back up at him, suddenly feeling nervous. "I got this in the mail today and I haven't opened it yet and I don't know if I want. And I didn't know who else to go to. Christina would just pity me and try to make things better and I don't want that…"

He looks at me and runs one hand down his face. "You might as well come in." He makes it sound like I'm being a huge nuisance, and maybe I am, but he doesn't turn me away.

I go to sit on the couch, staring at the letter in my hands. Tobias sits down a good distance away from me, resting his elbows on the edge of his knees. "Do you want to open it?"

Taking a deep breath, I rip open the envelope and unfold the piece of paper. "Dear Miss Prior, we are happy to know that you're interested in attending Brown University for the upcoming fall semester. But we are sorry to inform you that the Admissions Committee has since completed the selection for the class of 2019 and we cannot offer you a place in our school. We apologize deeply and wish you success in the near future."

My voice is shaking by the time I finish reading the rest of the letter and I feel like I've been punched in the stomach as hard as possible. My throat feels tight and tears burn behind my eyes.

Tobias moves closer, placing his hand on my back in a comforting manner. "Tris, I'm so sorry…"

"I…I didn't get in." I'm still staring at the paper and a tear falls onto it, smudging some of the ink. "I was rejected." This time I can't hold back the tears, they fall on their own accord. I lean into Tobias and he wraps his arms around me tightly, stroking my hair.

He doesn't say anything or try and tell me that it's their loss. He just holds me and strokes my hair, his chin resting on the top of my head. He waits until I stop crying, and even then he still doesn't pull away. He waits until he's sure I'm done crying and then loosens his hold on me.

I sit up, wiping my eyes. "You okay?" He asks and I shrug. "Do you want me to take you home?" Stupid question, I drove here.

"I don't want to go home." I say softly. "One of my parents brought the mail in; they had to have seen the letter. If they see that I opened it or it's gone, they'll want to know what it said. I can't explain this to them."

Not wanting to look at the letter again, I fold it back up and toss it on the coffee table. The tears start again and this time Tobias grabs my face with both his hands and wipes away the tears with his thumbs. "Hey, stop that. You don't need to cry."

I squeeze my eyes tightly, trying to get myself to stop crying. When I'm sure that I won't cry again, I look back up at Tobias. His blue eyes are dark and comforting. Something warm stirs in my stomach when I look at him and his palms suddenly feel really, really warm against my cheeks.

There's a similar look in his eyes that remind me of the look when he kissed me. I can't tell what the look is, exactly, but it's there and it makes the knot in my stomach tighten in a good way.

Shaking my head, I place my right hand over top of his left one on my cheek. "I was rejected…from my first choice college. The place I have wanted to go my _entire _life." This couldn't be happening.

No, it wasn't.

This was just a really, really bad dream and I'd wake up any second now to find a nice big packet on my dining room table with _Brown University Admissions Office_ written on the front with my name.

But this wasn't a nightmare and I wouldn't be waking up anytime soon.

"I'm sorry, Tris." Tobias apologizes again and I shake my head, getting angry.

"Stop apologizing. I told you I didn't want pity."

Laughing – he actually _laughs!_ – He shakes his head. "I'm not apologizing for that. I'm apologizing for the way I acted the other week. I was a jerk, no I was worse. I was a complete and total jackass."

I find myself nodding along, even though I didn't mean to. I stop.

"I shouldn't have said what I said and I should have chased after you to apologize right then. But I didn't and I regret it." His thumbs stroke my cheeks again. "I still stand by what I said, though. About us." I frown. "I want us to happen but it's too risky and complicated."

I don't care. I don't care! I don't care how difficult it'll be I just want him to myself. I want to be selfish and have him.

"Tobias, just stop." I pull his hands off of my cheeks, but instead of pushing his hands away, I twist my fingers through his left hand. "I honestly don't want to hear about what you want if you're not gonna actually try and take what you want."

My earlier woes over Brown disappear; well they're pushed to the back of my mind – another worry for another day.

"I want to, Tris. I want to so badly, but I can't." He lowers his head, staring at our hands.

I move closer to him and put my hand under his chin, forcing him to look at me. I lean in close to him, so that our lips are only mere centimeters away from each other and say softly, "Nobody needs to know. It can be our secret…"

He glances at my lips and then back up at me, searching my eyes for something. "I want to kiss you so badly right now, but…"

Shaking my head, I interrupt him. "No 'buts'." I press my palm to the side of his face and when I do, it's like something shocks him and he closes the little space between us, bringing my lips to his.

Snaking my hand around to the back of his neck, I grip the hair at the nape of his neck, twisting it in my hand.

His lips are hard on mine and I feel myself leaning backwards, falling. My back presses against the couch cushions and Tobias shifts himself so one of my legs is between both of his and his right hand is gripping the side of the couch.

I wrap my arms around the back of his neck, gripping my wrists. My breathing is heavy and all my worries about Brown disappear. I suddenly feel bad because I'm not sure whether I'm kissing him because I want to – even though I do want to, oh I've wanted to since the first kiss – or if I'm doing it because I know it'll help me stop feeling sad.

_Don't think, just kiss_.

Surprisingly, he doesn't pull away after awhile or tell me that it was a mistake – he keeps kissing me. Finally, I need to breathe so I put my hands on his chest and turn my head to the side. "Need some air…" He lifts himself up so his body isn't touching mine anymore, but he's still hovering over top of me, looking at me with bright eyes. There's a hint of a smile playing at his lips.

Then he says, "You know I can't go back to being just your teacher, right?" And then he smirks.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter Ten – Tobias's POV:

"No, Mom, I'm fine. I promise…yeah I'm staying with her. She's really upset and I don't want to leave her alone. Chris needs me. I'm borrowing some of her clothes. Yeah, no, I'll be home before Christmas Eve, I promise. Okay…okay yep, yeah, love you."

Tris hangs up her phone and sits back down on the couch next to me. "Everything good?" I ask and she nods, running her hand through her lengthy hair.

"I'm not…I'm not keeping you from anything tonight, am I?" She asks, her blue eyes wide and slightly guilty looking. Shaking my head, her shoulders sag in relief and she leans back against the couch. "You know I don't have to stay, I can go to Christina's."

Shaking my head, I drape my arm around her shoulders. "Tris, you are more than welcome to stay here." With my free hand, I tip her chin up so that I can kiss her.

When her lips touch mine, I feel like a sort of electrical shock goes through my body and I don't want to stop kissing her. She's so soft and warm and she does something to me. She has a hold on me that nobody has ever had on me before. When I first saw her in class, there was something about her that I found interesting – I don't know if it was when I saw her blush or when she admitted to needing my help, but it was there. The more time I spent with her, the more I wanted to talk to her and get to know her on a different level. But I knew the risks and even this – sitting in my apartment alone – was risky. If anybody ever found out about this, I could lose my teaching license and possibly even go to jail. I didn't want that.

But kissing her, kissing Tris, it took away all my worries for awhile. I was completely and totally consumed by her presence and how she felt in my arms.

We end up watching a movie on TV, some Christmas movie that I wasn't really paying too much attention to. I was zoning out, with Tris curled up into my side, her head resting on my chest. I wrap one arm around her waist, holding her to my side.

Every time I touch her or kiss her, there's a tiny alarm that goes off in the back of my head, warning me that this is bad. Warning me to stop it before it gets too far.

_Too late_, I think.

I don't know when we both fall asleep, but I wake up around two-thirty in the morning to my phone vibrating on the coffee table. Tris stirs in the crook of my arm and I do my best to move her as little as possible while trying to reach for my phone.

Zeke's name is lighting up on my phone and I blink a few times against the brightness of the screen. "Zeke, what do you want? Do you have any idea what time it is?"

"Didn't think you would mind me calling, dude! What are you doing? Get dressed and come over for some drinks!" His speech is slightly slurred and I can hear laughter in the background. No doubt he's invited some of his usual drinking buddies over.

I glance down at Tris, her breathing even. "I can't, Zeke. I'm wiped out, maybe another time."

Zeke offered to come over to drink but I quickly turned him down, telling him I really just needed some sleep. Thankfully he didn't try and pressure me anymore and hung up.

Tris sits up, rubbing the sleep from her eyes. "What time is it?" She asks, her voice thick with sleep.

"A little before three in the morning." She yawns, stretching out her arms. "C'mon, you don't have to sleep on the couch." I stand up, yawning myself, and wrap an arm around her waist as I basically drag her towards the bedroom.

She stands near the bed, blinking constantly to keep herself awake. I open one of my drawers, pulling out a large black hoodie and toss it to her. "I don't think you'd want to sleep in jeans and a sweater." She doesn't argue, probably too exhausted to even try, and ducks into the bathroom to change.

While she's in there, I quickly change into a pair of gray sweatpants and a white t-shirt. She comes back out, her clothes sloppily folded in her arms. She places them on top of my dresser and then shuffles over to the bed. My sweatshirt reaches slightly above her knees and I do my best not to stare.

She quickly climbs under the covers and pulls them up to her chin, shivering slightly. As soon as her head hits the pillow, she's asleep again.

I grab my pillow and a blanket and head into the living room, setting up my own bed on the couch.

The next morning I wake up around ten-thirty and my neck hurts like a bitch. I sit up, wincing and rub the back of my neck.

God I hate sleeping on the couch.

Tris is sitting up in my bed watching TV. She still has on the sweatshirt from last night but she put her jeans back on. She looks up at me when I step into the room. "Hey." She says in a small voice.

"How long have you been up?" I ask, sitting on the edge of the bed. She shrugs her shoulders and runs her fingers through her messy hair.

"Not long, maybe an hour and a half. I didn't want to wake you up." Our fingers find each other's and I brush my thumb over her knuckles, staring at our intertwined hands.

We sat in silence for a few minutes. During that time, I kept thinking about ways that this, us, could work out. I didn't want to lose my job or get in serious trouble, legal trouble, but I didn't want to lose Tris either. She still had five months until graduation and I didn't know if either of us had the restraint to stay away from each other.

Tris, ever the observant, notices my distracted looking and reaches for my other hand. "Hey, what's wrong?"

Sighing, I shift myself to face her. "I'm trying to figure all of this out." I hold up our intertwined fingers up between us. "I know that it's a simple problem for you to handle and deal with, I mean you would only have to lie to a handful of people. I have the entire board of education, Jeanine, my family and friends to hide this from." I laugh a breathy laugh and shake my head.

Looking up at her, I can see the hurt in her blue eyes. My chest aches and I reach my hand out to brush a strand of her hair away from her face and then rest my palm against her cheek. "I'm sorry, Tris. I want this, I really do, but I'm just…I'm terrified of what could happen if someone found out and decided to tell."

"So we don't tell anyone." She shrugs, like it really is that simple. "We just…avoid anyone from school or town."

Nodding slowly, I give her a questioning look. "So basically we'll either have to see each other in my apartment or…in the middle of Chicago, surrounded by a shit-ton of people and hope to God that nobody from here sees us? Sounds reasonable."

She yanks her hands away from me and crosses them over her chest, offended. "I didn't mean that, I'm sorry." God, I needed coffee badly. "Just…I wish this could be a lot easier."

I hadn't been in a lot of relationships in my life, mainly crappy high school ones where I wasn't with someone for longer than four months. It wasn't that I couldn't commit, it was that the girls just didn't do it for me. None of them had anything that made me want to stay with them. The same goes for the few relationships and dates I had in college and afterwards. Nobody did it for me – until Tris. She was the first girl I actually felt _something_ with. I didn't know what it was, but I definitely did not want to lose that feeling. I knew that relationships weren't supposed to be easy and that if it was worth it – it was worth all the hardships.

"Maybe it'll be easier after I graduate?" She suggests with a small, shy smile.

I laugh once, a humorless laugh. "Yeah, well, it'll still be difficult to explain why I'm dating someone who was a former student of mine."

"Okay, how about this – while we are in your apartment, there's no worrying allowed. We are not allowed to worry about the outside world or what could happen to us. This is our safe haven and it will remain a safe haven."

I can't help but smile at her and I nod. "Alright, deal."

Standing up, I pull Tris up with me and I head towards the kitchen. "Hungry?" I ask and Tris nods, lifting herself up onto the counter and crossing her ankles. "I can make some kickass French toast." I joke and she laughs, shaking her head.

After breakfast, I cleaned up the kitchen and Tris sat down on the couch, flipping through the TV channels. Once I was done cleaning I sat down on the couch and Tris propped her legs in my lap. "Tell me about your family." She says and I turn to face her and give her a questioning look.

"Why?" It came out sounding a lot harsher than I wanted it to, but I really didn't understand why she wanted to know about my family.

She shrugs her shoulders, playing with the strings on her hoodie. "Because I want to know about you. I barely know anything about you besides your name, how old you are and what your job is. Those are all the things I can basically get off of Facebook. I want to know about you."

"My Mom lives in the city and she works for a corporate office after she left the political field. I'm pretty sure your Father and my Mother know each other, so that's something." She smacks my chest with her hand playfully.

"What about your Dad? How long have your parents been married?"

Shifting uncomfortably, my playful smile disappeared and I shook my head. "My parents have been divorced since I was about eight years old. And I don't talk to my father and I don't like talking _about _him."

Tris sits ups, pulling her legs back towards her. "Why not? Did something happen between you two?" Looking over at her, I'm tempted to tell her to be quiet and that it isn't any of her business, but I see curiosity in her eyes and I feel kind of bad. She just wants to know about my life, even the worst parts. Half of me hated how curious she is but another part admires it.

"I just…it's not something I really want to talk about right now." I expect her to try and get an answer out of me, but she stays silent. Studying her, I suddenly realize she was only questioning me about my life because of the news from Brown. She was still upset about it and I was stupid to think she forgot about it.

Way to go, dude.

"Tris, about last night and Brown," I begin, but she shakes her head, biting her bottom lip.

She looks up at me, her blue eyes sad. "I don't want to talk about that. Like, ever again." She goes to stand up, but I grab her wrist and pull her back down to the couch. "Tobias, please."

"Why? You should talk about it; it might make you feel better."

"I just don't want to. I'm over it. Part of me kind of expected not to get in and was sort of prepared for disappointment." Wrapping an arm around her shoulders, I pull her against my side. "I guess it shouldn't have come as a surprise."

Sighing, I run my hand up and down her arm. "I'm sorry, Tris. I know it sucks. Did you apply anywhere else?"

She nods and looks up at me. "I applied to Elmhurst College, it was my second choice. I still haven't heard back from them but I know I'll most likely get in."

I can't help but smile. "That's a good outlook to have, at least."

Tris laughs and then pushes herself out from under my arm. "Can I ask you a question?" I nod. "Why did you sleep on the couch?" My earlier smile disappears and I'm taken aback by the question.

"I just…thought it would be more appropriate."

She sighs. "I wouldn't have minded, you know."

Rubbing the back of my neck, I shrug. "Yeah, but just…I don't know. I didn't really think it was appropriate, really, because it's not like we've been…together for awhile."

Tris frowns. "That's understandable, but I mean, is there really any other specific reason you wouldn't?"

"No and can we please drop it? I slept on the couch, that's the end of it." My tone was harsh and I could see I kind of hurt her but thankfully she didn't push the argument. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean for that to sound so harsh."

I've been apologizing a lot lately and it wasn't something I was very used to.

She shakes her head, wrapping her arms around her legs and pulling them into her chest. "Its fine, I shouldn't have been so intrusive. It was stupid of me and I don't know, I guess I thought that this," she gestures between us. "Would be a lot easier than it really is."

"You can't blame yourself for thinking that. I don't really think either of us had any clue." Glancing up at her, I reach over and pull her over to me, dragging her legs over my lap. She looks at me, somewhat startled, but that look disappears as she clasps her hands around the back of my neck and we both lean in, bringing our lips closer together.

We in no way solved all of our problems yet, but that didn't mean we couldn't ignore them for a bit, right? We were allowed to avoid relationship problems just like a normal couple. Yeah, we had a lot more problems than normal couples, but we were allowed to act normal.

At least for right now.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter Eleven

Christina tosses a cookie crumb at me, trying to get my attention. "Are you okay? You've been kind of distracted lately." She smirks, taking a big bite of her peanut butter cookie. "Daydreaming about some hot guy you saw?"

Not daydreaming so much as worrying.

Tobias and I had gotten together before Christmas and then after most of my family members left and Tobias was free of his Mom and Zeke, we got together again at his apartment. But each time, no matter how much he denied it, I know us being together still worried him. Honestly, you'd think he was expecting a SWAT team to bust down his door at any moment and execute him.

He tried to hide it a majority of the time we were together. I think he mainly did it to protect me or to keep me ignorant to how he felt.

"I'm fine." I lied, rolling my eyes at her. "Just…worried I'm not going to hear back from Elmhurst before the deposit deadline, that's all."

She rolled her eyes, reaching for another cookie. "You're going to get in. I mean, Brown's accepted you, right?"

Feeling a large knot in my stomach, I wrap my arms around myself and shrug. "I still haven't heard back from them yet, but I mean, I might want to stay in Chicago. I don't really think I want to go away for college."

Christina almost drops her cookie on herself, stunned. "Are you kidding me? Brown's all you've talked about since we were kids! It's been your first choice college since birth!"

"I know, but I'd rather stay home. We could get an apartment together, both attend Elmhurst. It'd be great."

This time, she almost chokes on her cookie. "Alright, what the hell is going on with you? Did you hit your head or something? Kill too many brain cells?"

Rolling my eyes, I kick her playfully. "No, just…I'm starting to think maybe Brown's just a dream."

"You have the grades, GPA and SAT scores to get in! You're perfect for it!"

I really wanted to change the topic, badly. I actually wanted to talk to her about Tobias but I knew that it wasn't a very good idea to do that.

All of a sudden, Christina's face lights up like a Christmas tree. "Does your wanting to stay home have _anything _to do with a guy?" She smiles a knowing smile and I feel my face get warmer.

"No, absolutely not." Not a complete lie. "It has to do with my family. I want to stay with them through college…"

Christina's joking demeanor changes and I'm suddenly on edge. "Tris, is everything seriously okay? You've never had a bad feeling about Brown and now you're suddenly all for Elmhurst?" Realization hits her and I can see it in her eyes. She knows. "You didn't get in…" It wasn't a question, it was a statement.

Sighing, I reach for a sugar cookie and poke at the icing. "No, I didn't get in. I got a letter a few weeks ago saying that they couldn't find me a place in the class."

"Tris, why didn't you tell me?"

"Because I knew you'd instantly tell me about how stupid they are for not accepting me and telling me that they would be losing out and I wouldn't! I didn't want sympathy."

Christina looks hurt, understandably. "Have you kept this to yourself that entire time?"

I shake my head. "No, I told…someone." I really, really hoped she wouldn't push for who 'someone' was, but I knew her too well.

"Who would you tell before me?" She asks, sounding offended.

"Chris, it doesn't matter." Christina stands up so fast I'm surprised she didn't get lightheaded. All traces of her earlier humor were gone and she looked mad – pissed, even.

"It doesn't matter? Of course it matters, Tris! I'm your best friend and you hide this from me?!" She crosses her arms over her chest.

Tossing the cookie back onto the plate, I stand up, my hands balled into fists. "Why are you so offended? _I'm _the one who got rejected from their first choice college! You know, the one that I've obsessed over for the past eighteen years!" Frustrated, I shake my head and try to lower my voice. "I think you should leave."

She left, slamming my bedroom door behind her and I sat back down on my bed. There was a small soft knock on my door and my Mom poked her head in. "Everything okay? Christina left here looking slightly upset."

I shrugged and watched as she came to sit down next to me, a packet in her hands. "I hope you two can work it through. I'd really hate to see you two stop being friends this close to graduation." A small smiles plays at her lips. "Speaking of graduation, this came in the mail for you today." She hands the packet over to me and I see _Elmhurst College Admissions Office_ written across the top of the packet. "Do you want to open it right now?" She asks when I keep staring at it.

"Uhm, no. I think…I think I'll go open it with Christina." My Mom smiles and hugs me, giving me a kiss on the forehead and then leaves. Once she leaves, I'm running to my car, over-excited.

Twenty minutes later I'm standing outside of Tobias's apartment and I'm banging on the door, open-palmed and as loudly as I can. Before he even has the door fully open, I burst past him and can't help but bounce on my feet, smiling. "What are you doing here?" He asks, not able to hide his smile.

I hold up the packet and Tobias shuts the door, walking over to stand in front of me. "Did you get in?" He asks.

"I don't know, I didn't open it but it's a packet!"

Taking a deep breath, I rip open the packet and pull out a folder. Opening up the folder, I instantly see the word _Congratulations _in the first paragraph. I basically had to force myself to read the rest of the letter, but once I did, I realized there was another letter behind the acceptance one.

"Oh my God…" I breathed.

Tobias stepped closer, placing a hand on my arm. "What?"

"I…I got in." I can feel my heart in my throat. "And I got a full scholarship. I got a full ride to Elmhurst!" Throwing my arms around Tobias, I bring my lips to his, taking him by surprise.

Pulling back, Tobias brushes a few strands of hair away from my face and he's smiling a large, all-teeth smile. "I am so goddamn proud of you, Tris." His words and the look in his eyes make my heart flutter and something tightens in my stomach. "I knew you were amazing, but I didn't expect this." He nods to the paper that ended up falling out of my hand.

He pulls my face back to his, twisting his hands in my hair, holding my face close to his. He's pulling me over towards the couch where he sits down and pulls me onto his lap. Both my legs go to either side of his thighs and I run my fingers through his cropped hair while his hands move down to rest on my waist.

I run my hands down his back and they rest at his lower back, at the bottom of his shirt. With shaking hands, I run my hands up under his shirt, the tips of my fingers brushing along the bare skin of his back.

He shivers and presses his lips to my throat. My breathing speeds up and once again I can feel my heartbeat in my throat, but this time it isn't out of excitement – it's out of nervousness.

There's a heavy knock at the door and Tobias cusses under his breath, pulling away from me. I shift myself off of him and move a little down the couch, out of sight of the front door.

Doing my best, I try to listen to the conversation. "Zeke, I just…I can't. Not tonight, I'm busy."

"Dude, you've been busy the last few months!" Zeke exclaims and I cover my mouth to stifle my giggle. "Unless it's because of some hot chick, I don't understand why you can't come out for a few hours."

Tobias sighs and I can picture the annoyed look on his face. "Zeke, I have a job. A full-time job, teaching none the less, and that takes up a lot of my time. I'm really sorry, dude. Maybe we can do something this weekend."

I hear a deep laugh and Zeke says, "Fuck, man. You're boring with this new job. I miss the old Tobias, the one who wouldn't hesitate to come out and drink."

"Yeah well, sometime people have to grow up." I heard the door shut and I turned around, resting my chin on the back of the couch. "Please tell me you weren't listening." Tobias sighs, stepping into the living room.

Smiling, I laugh. "Looks like your buddy misses you." I frown as Tobias crosses his arms over his chest. "If you want to go out with him I don't want to stop you. I can go home…"

He shakes his head. "It's fine. Zeke will find another friend to hang out with and he'll get over it. He always does."

Tobias looked like he wasn't upset about it, but I still felt bad. I wanted Tobias and I to work out, I really did. But I didn't want to take him away from his friends and family just to be with me. I wouldn't want to make his friends and family hate me before they even really knew me.

"Go hang out with him; I can go to Christina's. I owe her an apology anyways."

"Are you sure?" He asks. I'm not sure if he's worried about me lying about going to go see Christina or if he just doesn't want me to leave. Actually, the latter was probably just me being conceited.

Nodding, I push myself up off the couch. "Yeah, it's fine. My parents are probably wondering why I've been spending so much time at Christina's and God knows my mom will probably show up to her house one night."

Tobias smiles at that and presses a kiss to my forehead. I grab my Elmhurst letter and then leave.

I'm smiling as I walk towards the elevators and when I push the 'down' button, someone speaks behind me, scaring me. "Prior?" I turn around.

"Hayes?"

* * *

**So yeah, this wasn't as long as the previous chapters but I really just wanted to get something up. I actually have no excuse for not writing as much as quickly as I used to. I just occasionally get writers block and it sucks because I want to write but have absolutely no idea what to write. **

**But yeah, I'm so glad that you're all enjoying it and the positive feedback is actually helping a lot. **


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter Twelve:

Of all the people I could run into in Tobias's building, Peter is the very last person I would _ever_ expect to even be anywhere near the complex. So it was kind of very shocking when he suddenly appeared behind me at the elevators.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Crossing my arms over my chest, I fix him a glare. "Getting more drugs from your dealer?"

He smirks and then asks, "Yeah, you want some?" He rolls his eyes. "You don't need to know why I'm here."

"Actually, if you're doing the whole drug thing again, I kinda do."

He crosses his arms over his chest. "And why is that? Did your daddy have a change of career options? Switch from government lackey to police?"

"The last time you doled out drugs you almost killed one of my friends!" I spit, the words laced with venom.

Peter actually looks smug and it makes me want to lunge at him and pound my fists against his face. "Actually, I didn't almost kill her. She would've killed herself since, ya know, she was the one who bought the drugs."

Normally I would've lunged for him after that comment, but the sight of Al caught me way off guard. "Al? What the hell?"

From the corner of my eye I saw Peter smirk, but I was already walking towards Al. "Tris, what are you doing here?" He asks, looking at Peter nervously.

I said the first lie that popped into my head. "I was dropping something off for my mom's friend." It was a really crappy lie, but it was one neither of them would question…hopefully. Narrowing my eyes I ask him again, "What are you doing here?"

Before he could respond, Peter is at his side, slapping his back playfully. "Well Al, I guess I'll see ya at school. Nice doing business with you."

Peter turns and heads into the elevator just before the doors shut and I'm left standing in front of Al, eyes wide and mouth gaping. "Business?" My voice comes out high pitched, almost like a squeal.

"Don't worry about it." Al goes to push past me towards the elevators, but I grab his arm and pull him back. My hands tiny compared to the size of his arm, but he gets what I'm trying to do and stops anyways. "Let go, Tris."

I tighten my grip on his arm, staring at him in shock. "No! And what does Peter mean by business? Al, are you dealing drugs with him?"

No, this could not happen. Al could not be working with Peter, not after the way he reacted after the last incident. Not after he tried to help get him kicked off the lacrosse team. _What the hell_. I didn't want Al mixed in with Peter. I don't care how motherly I sounded, Al was my best friend and I didn't need him to get hurt or in serious trouble.

"No! Just…drop it." He ordered. I dropped my hold on his arm and stared at him, suddenly feeling hurt.

It took me a few seconds to form a coherent thought. "No, Al, I will not just drop it! You're one of my best friends and I don't want you involved with that asshole. I care about you too much."

Al's face twisted up like he just tasted something sour. "Why does it matter? I'm not hurting anybody and I've only talked to Peter a few times. It's not like I'm suddenly going to go off and be his drug-selling boyfriend."

"Al…" He interrupts me before I can say anything else.

"Tris, just drop it. Please." Without another word, he turns and disappears back into the room he came out of.

I stand in the middle of the hallway, completely torn between what I should do. I could easily go back to Tobias's room and tell him everything about Al and the possibility of him getting drugs from Peter, or I could leave and talk to Al myself later. He'd listen to me. He's my best friend, he has to.

Clutching my keys in my hands tightly I run down the steps, bypassing the elevator.

I'm slamming the palm of my hand against Christina's front door as hard as I can, hoping someone hears. "Christina! Open up, please!" A few seconds later, her mom opens the door, startling me. "Oh, hi. Is Christina home?"

She nods, cleaning her flour-coated hands off on her apron. "She's upstairs in her room. Is everything okay? She came home earlier and seemed pretty upset."

I shrug, moving past her. "It's just…friend stuff."

Taking the steps two at a time, I'm out of breath by the time I reach Christina's room. I throw open her door and falter backwards when I see her and Will lounging on her bed. I think I was more surprised by the fact that she was smiling and giggling instead of upset over our fight. Was I really that selfish? Did I really believe that after our fight she would've been curled up under her covers, crying and wanting to apologize?

Will speaks up, oblivious to my silent observation. "Tris? Is everything okay?" I look between him and Christina and silently argue with myself about whether I should involve him in this.

"Tris, you need to leave." Christina doesn't move from her spot on the bed, but Will's sitting up, a look of concern on his face. "Now."

Shaking my head, I take a deep breath. "I get why you're mad at me, I do. But now is not the time to be kicking me out of your house, Chris." Both of them look shocked by the tone of my voice, and I think I was a little shocked too, but I didn't let that faze me. "Al's in trouble. He's been talking to Peter and I saw them together earlier."

"Wait, stop." Will holds his hand out, shaking his head. "That can't be possible; Al is always shitting on Peter at lacrosse practice. He tried to get Eaton to kick him off the team! There is absolutely no way he'd be doing business with him. And Al's clean! He doesn't do drugs!"

If I didn't know better and didn't know how long Al and Will had been best friends, I would've said that Will was taking this more personally than he needed to. But he wasn't. They were almost like brothers and I knew that seeing him possibly in cahoots with someone who Will hated with practically every fiber in his being? Yeah, that had to hurt.

"No, this isn't…this isn't true. I'm going to talk to him." Will leaves the room, his phone in his hand.

Christina watches him leaves and then stands up. "When did you see this happen?" She asks, crossing her arms over her chest.

"A few minutes ago. I came straight here afterwards…" I look at her face to try and see if she's still mad at me, but her eyes are focused on the floor, avoiding looking at me.

"Where did this happen?"

Shit.

I can feel her staring at me but I can't make myself look at her directly in the eyes. "I was meeting a family friend at his apartment and I ran into Al." I was really hoping she wouldn't question it further.

Thankfully Will comes back into the room. I'm expecting him to look relieved and to tell me I was wrong, but he looks…pissed. Extremely pissed. "He wouldn't pick up the first two times I called him and then on the third time he answered and I asked him what he was doing with Peter. He started accusing you," he nods his head at me. "Of not being able to keep a secret. And then he said that what he was getting from Peter was none of our business." Will collapses onto the edge of Christina's bed, putting his head in his hands. "Fuck, I can't…I don't want him involved with that prick. He'll get in so much trouble and lose his chance at getting into college."

Christina's standing over Will, rubbing his back. She glances up at me, worry and fear etched on her face. "What are we going to do? Should we tell someone? Mr. Eaton?"

Will shakes his head and when he speaks, his voice his slightly muffled by his hands. "He'll just kick Al off the team. We need him."

The couple goes back and forth while I stand in the same spot, thinking. We can't report Al; we don't want him to get in trouble. But if he's getting whatever he's getting from Peter, if we removed him from the equation, it would end so many problems.

"Get rid of Peter." Both of them look at me, not hearing what I said. "We can get rid of Peter. If he's gone, we can help Al and not have to worry about anybody else getting hurt."

Christina's nodding, but doesn't look completely convinced. "One problem: How are we going to get rid of him?"

I didn't get that far in my plan, I had only thought of getting rid of Peter. But doing that would be extremely difficult without getting anyone else in trouble. We wanted him gone and out of the way but I knew nobody wanted to have anybody risk their futures for this.

Instead of giving them a bullshit plan and telling them we'll figure it out, I just shrug and say, "I don't know."

Christina speaks up, her hand still resting on Will's shoulder. "Look, we go back to school in two days and the lacrosse team doesn't have another practice for another five days. We have until then."

"That's your deadline? Friday is your deadline? Either have him off the team by then or what? We hire a mercenary to take him out?" He scoffs and so help me, Christina looked like she was actually considering the second option.

After that, Christina walked me to the front door. I turn to face her and before I can even open my mouth she apologizes. "Tris, look I'm really sorry for the other day. I shouldn't have been so rude to you. Your rejection from Brown was none of my business. I was just offended that you didn't come right out and tell me about it. I'm so used to you telling me everything and I don't know, I feel like lately you've been pushing me aside."

I wanted to tell her about Tobias so much, but I made him a promise. If I told her, I would be breaking my promise and I couldn't do that, no matter how much Christina meant to me. Breaking my promise would put Tobias at risk – I couldn't do that either.

Clutching my keys tightly in my hands, I just shrug. "I've been preoccupied with the Holidays…" Such a lame, lame excuse and it was clear Christina thought so, too. Her face gives everything away. "Look, Chris, I really want to explain what's going on, but I can't. And it's nothing personal, but I just…I made a promise and you know how much it means to me to keep my promises."

"I know and I hate that about you, but I also love it about you." She smiles and holds her arms out forward, gesturing for me to hug her.

"You're so annoying." I joke as I hug her tightly. "But I love you."

When I get home, Caleb and my Dad are sitting in the living room. I drop my keys in the ceramic bowl by the front door and stand in the doorway to the living room. "What's going on?"

My Dad turns to face me and he has a bright smile on. "I know this is very last minute, but we're going to the gala at my work."

I raise my eyebrows at him, confused. "Dad, we've never been to that. You never wanted to go before."

"Yes, but that was before everyone was home at once." He glances over at Caleb. "And it'll be the first public appearance for Caleb with his new fiancée."

Gaping, I turn to face Caleb. "Wait, you proposed?"

He nods, shoving his hands in his pant pockets. "Late last night, yes. And since we are going to Dad's work for the party, we figured it'd be a great opportunity to get publicity for the wedding."

My Dad is smiling at Caleb and I can see pride radiating off of him. "Your Mother and Susan are upstairs getting ready; I think you should go join them."

Trudging up the steps, I knock on my Mom's bedroom door. She opens it and pulls me inside, her eyes a little puffy and red. "Mom, were you crying?"

"Happy tears, honey." She nods at Susan who is looking beautiful in a light green dress that just barely touches her knees. It's tight around the top and then blossoms out into a full skirt. "Now, what are you going to wear tonight?"

I shrug. "What am I supposed to wear? Shall I go as a respectable young lady or should as go as the rebellious teenager that most of them probably expect me to be?" It was meant as a joke, but I can tell from my Mom's expression that she didn't think it was. Susan looked like she wanted to laugh, but then she saw my Mom's expression and didn't. "I'll just go get ready."


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter Thirteen

About an hour later we're at a large building that contains ballrooms used specifically for these purposes.

We walk past security and I watch as they all nod at my parents and then smile at Caleb, Susan and I. My Dad pulls Caleb off into a different direction than my Mom, Susan and I are heading.

Well, I'm heading towards the food and drinks and my Mom is leading Susan over to a group of women whose husbands are all most likely on the council with my Dad.

A voice speaks up behind me, startling me. "You know, I somehow expected to see you over here." I turn around and Tobias is standing behind me. I want to throw my arms around him, but I don't know who is here and if he's here that means his Mom is here and that can still get him in trouble.

"Yeah, well, I can hate this party all I want, but the food is amazing." I give him a smile and then I notice what he's wearing. He has on a black button up, the sleeves pushed up to his elbows - obviously he had on a nice jacket, but he must've taken it off when he got here – and he has a nice shadow of a beard going on.

I had to admit, he looked good a little scruffy.

He glances down at my dress, the same black dress I wore to homecoming, and then looks back up at me. "You look beautiful." My stomach knots up, in a good way, and I feel like my chest might burst with those words. I feel his fingers brushing against my hand and I tense up, looking around nervously.

"There are too many people here, Tobias."

Tobias nods, taking a small step towards me. "And it's crowded enough so that nobody will pay particular attention to us." He frowns. "Isn't this what you wanted? You were the one who said that in large crowds we'd be able to disappear."

"Yeah, but not when my parents are here. They can spot me in any crowd."

As soon as I say that, I see Susan maneuvering around the crowd of politicians and their families, a low 'excuse me' with her head down. She gets to me and breathes a sigh of relief. "Tris, there you are. Your parents want you."

She looks at Tobias and then at me. "Okay, let's go." I steal one last glance at Tobias and then pull Susan away.

"Who was that?" She asks, a small smile playing at her lips.

I dodge a caterer carrying a tray of red wine and slow down to keep pace with Susan. "It was nobody. Just…I was in his way."

"He's hot." She smirks and I playfully shove her.

I wasn't really going to argue with her statement, but I also wasn't going to say anything else because we reached my parents and they were standing with a group of people. The men were talking to my Dad and Caleb, one of the fatter men had his hand clasped on Caleb's shoulder and was laughing loudly.

My Mom turns to face us and smiles, wrapping her arm around my waist and pulling me to her side. "There you are! Why did you run off?"

"I went to get some food…" I trail off when I see Tobias standing with a group of guys no older than him. He's facing me and I see him wink. I bite the inside of my cheeks to keep from smiling, but it doesn't do too good.

For most of the night I'm stuck following my parents around and listening to my Dad brag about Caleb and Susan's engagement. A few of his friends ask me about college and Brown and I lie to them, telling them I haven't heard anything yet. "They must be saving the best for last!" One of the wives says and I resist the urge to hit her in her Botoxed face. I sit with everyone for dinner and then when everyone starts to drink, I steal myself a glass of champagne, earning a chastising look from Caleb.

He moves to stand next to me and I internally groan. "Caleb, I'm not in the mood right now."

"I'm not going to yell at you for drinking, trust me; I'm not too far behind you. I'm getting pretty tired of having to talk about my life." He takes a deep breath, leaning his elbows on the table and looking at me. "But that doesn't mean I'm going to get drunk. At least not here."

I'm about to yell at him for assuming I'd get drunk, but he shakes his head. "Just, please, don't drink too much. Dad will get pissed and you know it."

And with that, he leaves and walks back to Susan. Glaring after him, I down the rest of my champagne and then place it on a passing caterers' tray.

There's a voice in the back of my head telling me that someone is staring at me and I can _feel_ it. I turn around and see Tobias standing by a table, holding a beer in his hand. He nods to me and then gestures for me to follow him. I glance around for my parents and see my Mom talking with some older women and my Dad is talking to a group of me who I recognize as the higher ups in the council.

Believing I was free of being watched, I nonchalantly make my way towards Tobias. He turns and heads down a hallway, making a left turn here and then right and then he comes to a stop.

Before I can say anything, Tobias grabs my wrist and pulls me into a room, shutting the door behind us. I stumble backwards, glancing around. The room is empty except for a few tables and stacked chairs. There are large windows at the far end of the room with heavy golden curtains draped around them. The walls are white and the floors are a deep maroon with golden patterns stitched into it.

"What are you doing?" I ask, fighting back a smile. He locks the door and turns to face me, gripping my waist and pulling me towards him.

His face is inches from mine; I can feel his breath against my face. "You didn't want us to be seen together, so now we're alone."

I can feel my heart beating quickly and my breathing is so, so heavy. His lips lightly brush over mine and I feel like my heart skips a beat or two. "This wasn't exactly…" I try to catch my breath. "What I had in mind."

He moves his hands from my waist to under my thighs, gripping them tightly and lifting me up. I wrap my legs around his waist and he walks a few feet until I feel my back pressing against the wall. His lips are on mine and there's a hunger behind them that I haven't felt the last few times we've kissed. I mean, kissing him is nice – really, really nice – but it feels different. A good different.

One of his hands cups the side of my face while the other is wrapped tightly around my waist, holding me up. His lips move from mine to the corner of my mouth, then to my chin and then down my neck and back up again.

Tobias presses his body against mine and I can feel the bottom of my dress riding up to my hips. I suddenly feel very self-conscious and I'm pushing my hands against his chest. "Stop…" I can barely form the words, my breathing so erratic. "Tobias, please."

He stops kissing me and looks at me, confused and concerned. "Is everything okay?" Shaking my head, he gently lowers me down back onto the floor.

I quickly fix my dress before he can see it and then press my palms against my cheeks – they're really warm and no doubt red beyond belief. "I just…I don't want someone walking in." It was a really shitty lie – he locked the door – but it was the only thing I could come up with quickly enough.

"You're lying." He places his hands on his hips and looks at me, a playful smile plastered on his face.

Giving him a face, I cross my arms. "How do you know that?"

"I'm a teacher – it's easy for me to tell when someone is lying." I give him a look that says that he's not very convincing. "Plus you get the same dent between your eyes that you get when you're frustrated." He lightly touches the spot between my eyes and I swipe his hand away.

Shifting my weight from one foot to the other, I shrug and say "I just…I don't want to go too fast."

He casually shrugs and I notice, once again, how muscular his arms are and I'm suddenly distracted and don't hear him ask me a question. "Tris? Hello? You hungry?" When I nod he tells me to stay put and then disappears out the door.

When he comes back, I'm sitting on the floor, pulling my heels off and placing them next to me. He has two plates piled with food in his hands and a beer and water under one of his arms. He hands me one of the plates and I smile thankfully at him. When he hands me the water, I give him a look. "Why do you get the beer? I'm not driving."

Sitting down, he nods and places the beer to the left of him. "True, but you're also underage and if I remember clearly, you can't hold your alcohol." He winks and I shove him.

I start picking at the food on my plate and once I'm done, I lay my head down on his lap and he gently pushes my hair back away from my face. "How'd you know about this room?" I ask, looking up at him.

"I used to hide in here when my parents dragged me here when I was a kid." He looks around and then sighs, his hand absentmindedly stroking my hair. "Once my parents divorced I stopped coming. My…Father came here for awhile after the divorce. I guess he was hoping he'd see my Mom or me, but we avoided the gala for awhile. Then my Mom started dragging me here again and as soon as I turned eighteen, I put my foot down."

We sit in silence for awhile after that and I'm starting to wonder if my parents realized I disappeared. Normally they would've sought me out after being gone for so long. "Why'd don't you ever talk about your Dad?" I ask, not sure if I even meant to ask it out loud.

I feel him stiffen and I glance up at him, worried. "It's not really a topic I'm comfortable talking about."

"But why?"

He sighs and I can see that he's getting irritated. "Tris, it's not something I want to talk about. Not right now."

The silence returns and I know he's frustrated and now I'm frustrated and I just want to leave. So, I stand up and smooth out my dress.

As I'm putting my shoes back on, Tobias quickly stands up, reaching his hands out to me as if to stop me. "Tris, I'm sorry. But you really can't push me on that topic. It's way too personal."

"Fine, whatever. I won't push you on it." I unlock the door and look at him over my shoulder. "I'll see you in school." And with that, I shut the door behind me and head back into the ballroom.

Terrified Tobias was going to try and get me to meet alone with him again, I stay by my Mom's side for the rest of the night. I spot him every now and again, hanging out with some guys around his age and drinking. We make eye contact and his face gives away how sorry he is for earlier, but I still avoid him.

"Ready to go?" Caleb hands me my coat and I give him a smile in thanks. "You look as miserable as I feel."

I shrug, pulling my jacket on. "I'm just tired."

He laughs a humorless laugh, shaking his head and hiding his hands in his pants pockets. "You didn't take a nap when you disappeared for an hour?" When he sees my face he gives me a look. "Mom and Dad may not be that quick on the uptake, but I saw you disappear and follow that guy. Susan also said she saw you two talking earlier." He smirks. "Who is he?"

"He's…nobody. Don't worry about it. And please don't tell Mom and Dad."

"I mean, I don't know what I'd get out of it if I did tell them." The curious look on his face disappears and is replaced by one of worry. "Tris, who was he? I'm not going to tell Mom and Dad, I just want to know because I'm worried that something might happen."

I shake my head. "He's not like that. I trust him, Caleb. And I can't really…explain our relationship. It's difficult."

He shakes his head, placing his hand on my back and urging me towards the crowd of people heading out the front doors. "If it's so difficult, is it really worth it?"

His question takes me by surprise and I remain silent. Of course it's worth it, I mean, what I feel for Tobias, I've never felt for anybody else. I would fight for that until I couldn't fight anymore. I would never want to lose that feeling. But what if my feelings are one sided? What if he only likes me because of our relationship having to be hidden? Forbidden romances make everything more fun and sometimes people get bored once they're no longer forbidden.

"Don't get me wrong, you have to be able to fight for something in a relationship. But if it's too difficult to explain or you have to hide it?" He shrugs nonchalantly. "It just doesn't seem worth it to me."

I roll my eyes and playfully shove his arm. "That's because you're a guy and you're lazy."

We both laugh and we finally catch up with the rest of our family. Caleb wraps an arm around Susan and pulls her close to him. I watch them from the corner of my eye and I feel something tighten in my chest. The way Caleb looks at Susan – like she's the center of the universe, something to be worshipped – makes me smile.

It also makes me wish that I could be that open with Tobias and that we could be normal and show off our relationship.

My Mom's voice breaks me out of my little zone-out. "Beatrice, dear, are you coming?" She's holding the car door opened for me and I give her a shy smile and nod, climbing into the back seat next to Caleb.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter Fourteen

Caleb leaves the day I go back to school and he's up by the time I'm heading out the door. I give him a good-bye hug and then head out the door and to my car.

Everyone's waiting for me at Will's Jeep and I smile when I see Christina holding two cups of steaming coffee. She hands one to me and then quickly grips the coffee cup with two hands, trying to warm her cold palms.

"Now that you're finally here, can we _please _go inside? I'm freezing my ass off out here!" Christina bounces her legs against the front bumper of Will's Jeep and he looks worried for his car. "It's going to start snowing any minute and I don't want to be out here when it does."

We all laugh and head inside of the school. While we're walking, I notice Al is walking slowly behind us, his hands in his pockets.

I slow my pace to match his and nudge his arm. "What's wrong, Al?"

"Who says anything is wrong?"

Rolling my eyes, I grip the straps of my book-bag. "You're not talking to any of us and you're lagging behind. You didn't even smile at me when I showed up. I miss seeing your smile in the morning." His cheeks turn slightly red at that and I can't help but want to hit myself for adding that part. "I'm not kidding, Al. Something's wrong and I want you to know that you can tell me." I grab his arm and we both stop walking.

He keeps his head down and shrugs. "I just don't feel like talking, that's all."

"That has nothing to do with this and you know it." I sigh and lower my voice when I speak again. "This has to do with when I saw you with Peter, doesn't it?"

Al's standoff-ish attitude changes and he looks down at me, looking like I just offended him. Maybe I did. "This really isn't the place to talk about that and like I said before, it's none of your business."

He stalks off and I run my hands through my hair, frustrated.

I'm just about to turn and head to class when Principal Matthews approaches me. "Ms. Prior, just who I wanted to talk to." She has a serious look on her face, which is never good when it comes to her. "Can you come with me to my office?"

"I have to get to class or I'm going to be late…"

She gives me a smile that almost looks like a grimace. "That'll be no problem; I can write you a pass."

Having no other excuse, I follow her down the hall towards her office. I've only been in her office a few times – all good reasons – but right now, I felt like I was in trouble. Her office was really nice for a high school principal's office. It was decently sized with a large mahogany desk in the center, matching bookcases behind it and a white Mac computer on the desk. There were also different awards hanging on the empty wall space and a few diplomas with 'Jeanine Matthews' on them.

Ms. Matthews sits down in her chair and gestures for me to take a seat across from her. Gripping my coffee in my hands, I sit on the edge of the chair across from her. "I wanted to talk to you because I had some…concerned people bring something up to my attention." She folds her hands together on her desk and leans forward on them. "There have been comments about your…relationship with your Government teacher, Mr. Eaton."

Her eyes are piercing, almost like she's trying to poke around in my head to find proof of the accusations. "It's just gossip…" I say nonchalantly.

She nods slowly, giving me a fake smile. "Normally I would ignore the gossip that tends to circulate the halls, but when it comes to this type of rumor, I have to intervene. If the gossip were true, it could cause a lot of problems."

"But it's not true." I say defensively.

The smile disappears and she leans back in her chair. "I would normally believe you, having a pretty good background on your family and how you're all almost honest all the time. But I had an anonymous person tell me that they saw you and Mr. Eaton together at the Mayor's Gala."

"I mean, yeah we saw each other and had a conversation, but since when is that illegal? Nothing else happened!" I stutter over my words and that might make everything a lot worse.

Her face darkens. "Ms. Prior, I respect your family and really hate doubting you." The look on her face when she says that makes me want to laugh. She's lying. "But I am truly concerned about the rumors. I've never really heard any other rumors about you and then suddenly this rumor comes up? It seems rather odd, don't you think?"

I shrug, my hands shaking against my coffee cup. "It's not like everyone loves me. I do have people who hate me. One of whom you put on the lacrosse team after his parole was over." I narrow my eyes at her, and my nervousness turns into anger. "Why did you do that? He's dangerous and can hurt someone! Who knows how many underclassmen he's coerced into taking drugs? Peter Hayes was expelled! He was never supposed to come back to school!"

"Beatrice, this is not the time for that conversation and it was not why I brought you in here. I am the principal and I know what is good for this school."

I'm on my feet and seething with anger. "Good for the school? He's a drug dealer! He's dangerous to himself!"

She's on her feet, leaning over her desk and glaring at me. "You need to leave, Beatrice. Now."

There's a lot more I want to say to her, some of them not very school-appropriate. I'm too angry to go to class so I do something that I have never done before – I leave school.

Normally I would be panicking as I walk to the parking lot, but right now I'm too angry. When I get to my car, I grip the door handle and notice that my hands are shaking and I'm not completely sure if it's from anger, nerves or just the coffee that I somehow managed to finish on my walk from the school to my car.

Taking a deep breath, I open the door and sit down. I'm still calming down when I notice that there's a bundle of white lilies sitting on the passenger seat. I'm slightly confused when I see the small card poking out from the top.

_ Tris, _

_ I'm sorry for the other night. I'm an idiot and I'm still getting used to this whole relationship thing. Forgive me?_

_ -T_

_ P.S., you really shouldn't leave your car unlocked…_

Some of my earlier anger diminishes and I can't help but smile at the gesture. I hurry out of the parking lot and head home. I know that school's going to call my parents and tell them that I wasn't in school, but until then, I would enjoy being home alone.

Christina texts me a few times asking me where I am, but I don't reply to them. And then Tobias is texting me, asking me if we can talk or if I saw his gift or if I was okay.

Frustrated, I plop down on the living room couch and turn on the TV. A few minutes later, there's a knock at the front door and Christina pokes her head in through the front door. "What the hell?"

"Wow, way to sound excited to see me." She shuts the door behind her and drops down on the couch next to me. "Will told me he saw you leave early and I gotta say, Tris, I am surprised you ditched. You, of all people." She's smiling, her brown eyes crinkling. "I'm so proud of you. But why did you ditch?"

"Avoiding life and responsibilities." I shrug, facing the TV. "I needed to take a sick day."

"Al told me Matthews dragged you to her office. What was that about?"

Looking at her, I feel a struggle over whether I should finally tell her about me and Tobias or if I should just keep her out of it. The less people involved the better. "It was just about a rumor that she heard about me and wanted to make sure it wasn't true. Not a big deal until I started to yell at her about Peter being on the lacrosse team."

Christina slaps her hand over her mouth, but I know she's smiling. "Did you really?" When I nod, she laughs. "Holy shit, Tris! Wait…you didn't get suspended or anything, did you?"

"Nah, but she seemed pretty ticked off."

Changing the topic of a conversation with Christina is pretty easy. But that doesn't mean that she doesn't remember earlier discussions and doesn't try to push them again. Thankfully, she didn't push what the rumor was and I was hoping she hasn't heard it yet.

We both get hungry around noon, so I pull out a leftover pizza from the fridge and we eat it cold – just how Christina likes it. "So what's going to happen when your parents find out about you skipping?"

I shrug, picking at the crust of my pizza slice. "Who knows? But all I know is that it can't be worse than how they'll react when I tell them about Brown."

"Are you telling them soon?"

"Might as well tell them tonight. The deposit for Elmhurst is due soon."

She gives me a bright, knowing smile. "Speaking of Elmhurst. Guess who got in, full ride?" I gape at her and then throw my arms around her, hugging her tightly. "We get to be roommates!" She exclaims, sounding a lot more excited than she did when she told me about getting a full ride.

Christina leaves around two and my mom shows up shortly afterwards. When she steps inside, shock and then confusion cross her face and then she looks disappointed. "Beatrice, are you supposed to be home? Did you have half a day?"

I shake my head, turning the TV off and standing up. "No, I…I had to leave early. A problem came up and I just…I couldn't stay at school the entire day."

My Mom crosses her arms across her chest and her stance radiates how irritated she is with me. "So you just left? Beatrice, you know you can't do that! It's irresponsible and you could've gotten in trouble!"

"But I didn't and it was the only time I've ever done that. I won't do it again, I promise." I would have thought that she would argue with me about it and maybe even ground me, but she didn't.

She sighs and rubs her temples with her fingers. "I'm too tired to argue with you about this, but I trust you when you say you won't do it again. But I have to ask, what was so bad that you had to leave?"

I mimic her earlier stance and cross my arms over my chest. "It was nothing, just…just a stupid rumor. It was a lie, but it just…it got to me."

"Honey, you can't let rumors get to you. You're graduating in a few months and after that, all the high school drama and rumors will disappear. It'll be so much easier." I highly doubted that, but I let her comfort me. "I'll have dinner ready by five-thirty. Dad will be home late."

She starts to head up the stairs to change out of her work clothes, but I quickly call her. "Uh, Mom. Can I….Can I tell you something?" She turns to face me, concern written all over her face. "I um…I heard back from Brown." My voice is shaky, matching how my hands feel. "And…I…" My lower lip starts to tremble and tears burn behind my eyes. "I didn't get in."

My Mom walks towards me, shaking her head. "That's not…how is that possible? You have the SAT scores; you have the grades and everything! How did you not get in?"

I shrug, a nervous laugh bubbling over my lips, the tears already falling. "I got rejected! I don't know why, but I got rejected!" The tears turn into full on sobs and my mom wraps her arms around me. "I wanted to get in so badly and I didn't…" I sob into her shoulder.

"I know sweetie, I know. And I wish I could do something to change their minds, but it's too late for that." She strokes my hair gently, just like she did when I was a child and ran to her after having a nightmare. "But that doesn't mean you aren't going to succeed. You can still go to one of the other colleges you applied to. No matter where you go or what you do, your father and I are so proud of you."

Wiping my eyes, I look at her, confused. "But I thought…I thought you and Dad wanted me to go to Brown. I thought you would be pissed if I didn't get in."

She laughs and cups my cheek. "Oh, Beatrice. Of course we wanted you to get in! It was the school of your dreams! We only wanted what you wanted." She brushes a strand of hair away from my face and gives me a sad smile. "Is that why you didn't tell us? Because you were worried we'd be mad at you?"

When I nod, she shakes her head. "We could never be mad at you for not getting into a school. You've always tried your best and that's all we can ask for."

Later that night, my Mom explains to my Dad about my rejection from Brown. The entire time she's talking during dinner, I grip my fork so tight that my knuckles start to turn red. At first my Dad looks irritated, but then as my Mom explains why I kept it from them, his irritation turns to sadness. "Beatrice, is that true? You were scared of how we would react?"

When I nod, he reaches his hand across the table and grips my hand reassuringly. "Beatrice, we wouldn't be mad at you. Disappointed, sure. But we wouldn't be disappointed in _you_, just in the school."

After dinner, my parents let me go upstairs to my room while they clean up. Once I'm in my room, I change out of my day clothes and into a pair of comfy sweatpants and into a large shirt. I check my phone and see a few text messages, most of them from Christina. But there's also a voicemail and Tobias's number in the recent calls.

"Tris, look…I know you're pissed at me – I'm pissed at myself – but I just. The silence is absolutely killing me and you didn't show up to class today and I'm worried. Please just…call me back. This is Tobias, by the way."

The voicemail cuts off and I lock my phone, tossing it to the end of my bed.

I stare at my phone; feeling like the black screen is taunting me. The urge to call Tobias back is unbearable and I bite the pad of my thumb and shake my foot nervously.

_The silence is killing me._

* * *

**So, I'm totally not gonna lie - I was pretty much done writing this like...last week, but I didn't like how it had originally ended so it took me awhile to change it up to something decent. But holy shit, the amount of reviews and followers I have on this story is unbelievable! I never actually expected this to blow up and get as many good reviews as it has. It means so much to me and I really appreciate it.**


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter Fifteen

Tobias's POV

I have my phone pressed against my ear when I hear the loud banging on my door. "This silence is absolutely killing me and you didn't show up to class today and I'm worried. Please, call me back." The banging stops and Zeke opens the door up, giving me a look. "This is Tobias, by the way." I say quickly before hanging up.

"Yo, why the hell didn't you answer the door?" He punches me on the shoulder and then wraps his arm around my neck, trying to put me in a chokehold. Zeke's never been able to successfully accomplish it. "On the phone with a hot chick?"

Shaking my head, I laugh humorlessly. "Not how I would word it. What do you want, Zeke?"

He nods, patting me on the back. "Get dressed, we're going out drinking."

"Zeke, I have to work tomorrow and I don't think going out and getting drunk would be a good thing."

Zeke drops his arm from around my shoulders and steps back. He looks irritated and…sad. "Look, Tobias, I get how you have to be a responsible adult and everything now – I really do – but you've been shutting me out and ignoring me. It's been forever since we went out and got drunk together and since we even watched a game together. You're my best friend and I care about you."

I knew taking this job would mean that I would have to be more of an adult, even though it killed me to do so, but I wanted the job badly. I _needed_ it. But I didn't think it was getting to the point where I was pushing away my best friend.

"How about this weekend we make it a guys' weekend? I'll let you drag me to whatever bar you want and get me drunk." He perked up at the suggestion and then left, decently happy for once.

After the door closes, I plop down onto the couch with my head in my hands, frustrated. Not five minutes after Zeke left, there's another knock on the door – another, smaller and lighter knock. Normally I wouldn't be so slow to open the door, but it was late at night and the only person I know who would knock at my door this late is Zeke – and he already left.

"Tris…" She gives me a small and shy smile when I open the door. "What are you doing here?" Glancing up and down at her, I see that she's wearing a pair of skinny jeans and a plain white t-shirt along with some snow boots and a black jacket.

She shrugs past me, her arm brushing my arm. "Well, earlier I got this phone call from this guy who was apologizing a lot. And he apparently left a bunch of lilies – white ones, my favorite nonetheless – and there was a part of me that wanted to make him suffer. I mean, he kind of deserved it. But another part of me felt bad."

"So you got the flowers." Tris smacks my arm, but she's smiling. "I really am sorry, Tris. I was a huge dick and when you didn't show up to class, I became nervous and I thought I scared you off."

"You couldn't scare me off…" She quickly says, shaking her head. "If that was the case, I never would've come here that first night."

Without realizing it, I step closer to her so that I'm basically standing over her, looking down at her. Her blue eyes are dark and insistent, beautiful. I cup the sides of her face and she stills. I brush a few strands of hair away from her face and her eyes flutter. I brush my lips against her forehead and say, "Forgive me…"

She shakes her head, placing her hands on my hips – most likely to steady herself. I lean my head down to press my lips to her neck and again say, "Forgive me…"

"No." Her shaky voice is barely audible and I can't help but smile.

I brush light kisses along her neck and to the corner of her mouth. "Please?" I ask, my lips hovering over hers, so close I could feel her lips quivering.

She pushes herself up onto her tip-toes and brings her mouth to mine. There's a fever behind the kiss, one I haven't seen with her. She wraps her arms around the back of my neck and I secure my arms around her waist.

When Tris finally pulled away, she looked up at me. "You're not playing fair." She accuses me and I give her a cocky smile. "But in all seriousness, Tobias. We really do need to talk about our argument. Because it wasn't unjustified in any way." She unlocks her arms from around my neck and grips both of my hands.

"How much time do you have until you have to get back home?" I ask, and I receive an irritated look from her.

Shrugging she says, "They think I'm with Christina, so they probably won't expect me home until at least noon tomorrow." She quirks an eyebrow at me. "Why?"

I grip her hand tightly in mine and start pulling her towards my bedroom. I point at my bed and nod at her. "Sit, I'll be right back." When I look at her, her face is whiter than normal and her leg is bouncing against the carpet.

Trying to push back any worries I have about her ditching me, I disappear into my closet and pull a medium sized brown box from the top shelf and dust it off.

Tris fixes me a look when I walk out with the box, placing it on the bed next to her. "You were angry at me because I refused to tell you anything about my life. It's not because I'm terrified of opening up to you, because trust me – I really want to tell you everything. But I didn't have the most…memorable childhood."

Opening the box, I grab the photo book on the top and sit down next to Tris. I hand her the book and she takes it carefully, as if it might disintegrate the second she touches it. I watch as she starts to flip through the book, smiling at most of the pictures and laughing a few times. When she gets to the end, she shuts the book and hands it to me. "Do you have anymore?" The earlier anxiety is gone, replaced by excitement and curiosity. I nod and grab the second book, the last book, from the box and hand it to her. She opens it, thoroughly excited and after two pages, the book becomes empty. She flips through a couple more pages and then looks up at me. "Where are the rest?"

"I only have pictures up until I'm five years old, after that – nothing." I take the photo album back from her, placing it back in the box under the first album.

She shakes her head. "Why? I mean, I get how your parents must've been busy because they were on the Council, but still. You still should have had a well documented childhood."

I give her a small, sad smile. Oh, how I forget how naïve some of the younger generations can get. "After my fifth birthday, something happened and I still don't understand what happened to cause the change. But my Dad started drinking, a lot, and he would come home after work, late, late at night and be completely drunk. The first time it happened, I was terrified. I didn't know what was happening and all I heard was my parents downstairs, screaming at each other. My Mom was yelling at my dad, telling him to get out of the house and not to come back until he was sober. Honestly, I'm surprised we never had the cops called because of all the screaming." A give a sad laugh, looking down at my hands that were twisted together. "After that, my Mom wouldn't scream at him anymore and I noticed that she would hide away in the guest room whenever he would come home. Bruises and marks started to appear on her skin and even at five-years-old, even as a small child, I understood what he was doing. And I did what I thought I should do – I confronted him one night. My entire fifty-pound self walked up to him and told him to leave because he was 'hurting mommy'." Tris placed her hand on my back, most likely trying to soothe me. "After that, he started to beat me. It was in places where I could hide it easily with clothing and I usually got the belt most times when I didn't do as he said." Taking a deep, shaky breath, I continue. "It went on for years. Until I turned fifteen and my parents got a divorce. My Mom got full custody of me, and my Dad got absolutely nothing. The council found out about his abuse and fired him and took away all of his money, giving it to my Mother and myself. I thought I would be free of him and that he would never be able to hurt my Mom again. But somehow, he still kept coming into our lives. He would show up at the mayor's gala and he would follow my Mom and me around. So eventually, we stopped coming."

"Not because your Mom stopped forcing you to go." Tris interrupts and I shake my head.

I rub my hands on my knees, wiping the sweat off. "She stopped forcing both of us to go. She didn't want to have to see him anymore."

Tris takes my hand in hers and squeezes it tightly. "Tobias, I'm so, so sorry. I didn't know…"

"How could you? I haven't told many people about my childhood. Just you and Zeke." I look up at her and see a few stray tears falling down her cheeks. I brush them away, leaving my hand on her cheek.

She wraps her arms around my waist and I pull her into me, hugging her tightly. "God, I feel awful about yelling at you for not telling me about your life. I'm such an ass." She says, and I can't help but laugh at her.

"That makes two of us." I respond, pressing my lips to the top of her head. "It's getting late, are you tired?" She shakes her head in response. "How about a movie?"

Tris nods and kicks off her shoes, folding her legs under herself on the bed. I toss her the remote control for the TV and then dig through one of my dresser drawers until I find a plain black hoodie and toss it at her. She catches it and gives me a questioning look.

"I highly doubt you're going to want to sleep in jeans. It can't be comfortable." She shrugs and then disappears into the adjoining bathroom to change. While she's in there, I relaxed back into my regular spot on my bed and turned the TV on.

She comes back out, her clothes folded neatly in a little pile that she places on top of the dresser and then sits down on the bed next to me, pulling her legs into her chest and wrapping her thin arms around her knees.

"So let me guess," I turn to face her, giving her a gentle smile. "You're participating in senior skip day tomorrow, right?"

Tris gives me her best innocent, all-American girl smile and shrugs. "I don't know what you're talking about." She snatches the remote from my hand and winks at me. "I'm picking the movie because I don't feel like watching the History Channel."

"Hey, just because I'm a history teacher doesn't mean I enjoy watching the History Channel - just 'Pawn Stars'." She laughs and stretches out her bare legs and rests her head on my shoulder. Tris keeps flipping through the channels until she gets to a random movie. Once she does, she tosses the remote to the middle of the bed.

We both end up falling asleep towards the middle of the movie and Tris is wrapped tightly around me – her head on my chest, her arm thrown across my stomach and her legs tangled up in mine. She's breathing softly and every now and then I can feel her leg or arm twitch – maybe she's dreaming she's running.

My alarm goes off around five-thirty in the morning and both Tris and I jump, suddenly fully awake. I slam my palm down against the "snooze" button and then rub my eyes.

Tris groans, rolling to her side so that her back is to me. "Good morning." I joke, leaning over her. Her hands are covering her face and she groans again. Laughing, I press a kiss to her forehead.

"Am I supposed to leave since you're going to work?" Her voice is heavy with sleep and it's kind of adorable.

I wrap an arm around her and pull her back against my chest. "I actually think I'm coming down with something and I should probably stay home. I wouldn't want to give it to anybody." She tilts her head back to look at me, her eyes still barely opened, a sleepy smile playing at her lips.

"You do look sick. You should definitely call out of work." I press a kiss to the side of her mouth and excuse myself, taking my phone from the bedside table.

After my phone call with Jeanine, I walk back into the bedroom and Tris is out. Carefully, I climb back into bed and wrap my arm around her waist, pulling her against me. I fall back to sleep right away.

Neither of us wakes up until later, around ten in the morning. Tris rolls over to face me, and yawns into her hand. She gives me a smile and runs her hand down my cheek. "So I guess we're both playing hooky today?"

Laughing, I nod. "Yeah, I guess so. I haven't done this since I was in college." Tris laughs and rolls her eyes. "Do you want breakfast or…?"

"Stay in bed? I'd rather stay in bed while you make breakfast." I give her a look and she leans in close to me, giving me a quick peck on the lips. "Or I can help you make breakfast."

"Sounds good." I head into the kitchen while Tris gets dressed.

When she comes out, she leans against the counter, watching me mix together the pancake batter. "Got any blueberries?" She asks and I gesture towards the fridge. She takes the small plastic container of berries out and places it on the counter by the plates.

Her arms wrap around my waist and she leans her head against my back. I stop what I'm doing and turn around so that I can wrap my arms around her and pull her into my chest.

"What's your tattoo of?" Tris asks, surprising me. "I mean, I can see black tips poking out on your neck." Her finger lightly traces the back of my neck and I shiver slightly. She smiles.

"Do you want to see it?" I ask.

"Do you want to show me it?" She responds and I give her a small smile, suddenly feeling much warmer. When I nod, she unwraps her arms from around my waist and takes a step back. I pull my t-shirt off over the head, turning my back to her so she can better see the tattoo. It covers pretty much my entire back and licks around to my ribs. "Wow…That's a lot of tattoo." She laughs humorlessly, shocked. "Why?" I feel her cold fingertips tracing from the middle of my back, around to my ribs.

"I wanted something to hide the marks." When I tell her that, it feels like my chest is lighter – like this was a burden that I needed lifted. The thing that surprises me the most is the fact that I didn't think twice before admitting to Tris about my tattoo, before asking her if she wants to see it. It scared me how much I trusted her.

Turning to face her, I reach for her hand and run them over the marks I have memorized; the one that crosses the edge of my left ribs, the one close to the small of my back. They're mainly scars, but they're slightly raised from when they healed.

She doesn't make a sound, but the look on her face speaks legions. There's hurt, mingled with fear and anger and…protectiveness. "Oh, Tobias…" She throws her arms around my neck, hiding her face in my shoulder.

I wrap my arms around her waist, holding her to me. "I am so sorry," She mumbles into my shoulder and I hear her sniffle. "You shouldn't have had to go through that…"

Hearing her sniffle again, I pull her back so that I can look her in the face. I wipe her tears away with my thumbs and place my hands on either side of her face. "That was the past. I got the tattoo to cover it up and make me forget everything. It's helped. I am so much better than I used to be." She gives me a small smile, but it's something. It's better than her crying.

She nods and then leans in to hug me again, and I hold her tightly against me. Breakfast all but forgotten.

* * *

**This took me forever to finish because I've been on vacation, working and I may have binge watched an entire 3 seasons of a TV show to avoid finishing this. But anyways, it is finished. **

**Anways, so I'm planning on continuing the story while Tris is in college, but I'm already on chapter 15. So would you guys prefer me to start a sequel to this or make it easier and just continue posting the chapters to this story even if it ends up having like 30+ chapters?**


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter Sixteen

Christina's staring at me, her brown eyes huge and her mouth set in a full smile. "It's a great idea and you know you want to."

Shaking my head, I twist the straw in my milkshake around. "No, I don't know how many times I have to tell you. I do not want to have a birthday party."

My birthday is on Friday and for the past two weeks my friends have been bothering the hell out of me to go along with the whole birthday party idea. I really didn't want to have a party, regardless of how old I was turning. Eighteen was a significant age, but I really didn't care for parties – I hated being the center of attention. I would be fine with just going out to dinner with my parents and having the typical sleepover with Christina, Marlene and Lynn. But apparently, they all had other ideas. Like having a house party with a bunch of people I barely talk to. Now, I'm all for going to parties, but throwing them? Absolutely not.

"My parents would kill me."

She leans back in the booth, grabbing a French fry and dipping it in her chocolate milkshake. She stuffs the fry in her mouth and gives me a knowing smile. "Which is why Uriah's parents have gratefully taken up a last minute weekend vacation to Lake Erie. The house is free for three days."

I sigh, taking one last sip of my milkshake. "I don't really even have a choice in the matter, do I?"

"Nope." We pay the check and then leave. We stand outside in the parking lot by our cars and Christina gives me a tight hug. "Be happy, Tris. You're finally going to be legal and can do whatever the hell you want and make out with whatever guy you want."

Rolling my eyes, I hug her back. "Because the only bright side to being an adult is getting to make out with other adults and not worry about age."

"Basically." She gives me a bright smile and we part ways.

When I get home, both my parents are sitting in the living room on the couch, side by side. I don't take this as a good sign – the last time they were like this, they told me that my grandmother died.

I drop my bag on the floor by the steps and slowly walk into the living room. "Hey…what's going on?"

My Dad looks up at me, and nods to the chair across from them both. "We wanted to talk to you about something, Beatrice." Suddenly, I feel like he's going to lecture me about college and Brown – that all his calmness was an act and that he was saving it up until now. He looks at my Mother quickly and then back at me. "We were expecting that next year you would be going away to school, to Brown. We both realize that things have changed, but we didn't want to deny you the ability to live on your own."

I'm completely and totally lost. "Okay?"

Mom gives me a smile and nudges my Dad's arm. "We got you an apartment close to Elmhurst." I blink a few times, my mouth hanging open in surprise. "I talked to Christina's mom and found out that she was attending Elmhurst too, so we all pitched in and got you two an apartment together. It's less than five minutes to the campus."

"You're serious?" Is all I manage to ask, once I can speak. "You got me an apartment for college?"

They both smile and nod. "We felt terrible about you not getting into Brown and wanted to make sure that you would be happy while in school. We thought that getting to live with Christina in your own apartment would be a little bit of a perk."

I jump up from my chair and hug them both. They stand up so that I don't have to bend down to hug them.

"However," My mom begins, her voice suddenly serious. "Both of you girls need to keep your grades up to keep the apartment. If either of you are in danger of failing, you both move back home and lose the apartment."

"I promise, our grades will be perfect. We'll get honors."

They both hug me and I race to my room to call Christina. Apparently her Mom broke the news because we're both screaming to each other on the phone about being roommates with our own apartment and not having to live in dorms.

After I hang up, I sit on the edge of my bed for a few minutes, in a happy bliss. I would be going to college and I would be going with my best friend and living off-campus. I would still be able to see my family whenever I wanted. I couldn't be happier.

_You'll still be near Tobias…_

I felt a small flutter in my stomach at the thought of being able to see Tobias while in college. I wouldn't have to say good-bye to him.

On Friday at school, my friends greet me at my usual parking spot in the senior lot with balloons and Christina has a hot coffee and what looks like a chocolate cupcake in her hands.

"Happy Birthday, Tris!" Christina beams and Will hands me the balloons. I feel my face get warm at the realization that people are staring. I shove the balloons into the back of my car and take the coffee and cupcake from Christina.

"You guys didn't have to do this."

Uriah shrugs and says, "We didn't – Christina did all of this. She made us play along." Christina smacks the back of his head and then Marlene and Lynn slap the back of his head. We all laugh as he rubs the soreness away. "That hurt!" He fakes being mad at us and then smiles his usual bright, toothy smile. "Anyways, the house is free for the weekend and my parents left late last night. But my brother might be stopping by for a bit and I already told him not to worry about anything."

"He's not going to go all 'responsible adult' on us, is he?" Lynn asks, looking irritated.

Uriah shakes his head. "Zeke? A responsible adult? That's hilarious, Lynn."

We all head off in our separate directions. I follow Uriah and Al towards Math and Al's his quiet self. He's become reserved over the past few weeks and he barely talks to Will and Uriah, let alone me. If anything, he keeps his distance and only occasionally glances at me. When he does, I feel like I can see anger and disappointment in his eyes. But I never know if it's directed at me or at himself.

When I walk into Government, I see Tobias glance at me and then back down at his desk.

I take my seat, pulling my textbook out and grabbing a pen and notebook. Tobias walks up to the board and starts to write the lesson on the board. Christina sits down next to me in her usual seat and gives me a knowing smile. I roll my eyes and try to avoid her excitement for the rest of the class.

Once class finishes, Christina instantly starts talking about my party later tonight but is interrupted when Tobias clears his throat. "Tris, can I talk to you? It's about your last test grade."

Christina leaves and I stand in front of Tobias's desk. He's quiet until the last person leaves and then he clears his throat.

"So I heard that today is your birthday." He places his palms flat on the top of his desk and leans forward on his arms. "Why didn't you tell me?"

I shrug, tugging my hair over one shoulder. "I don't like all the attention it brings me. And I would've told you but I didn't think it was that big of a deal…"

He gives me a small smile that makes my insides twist in a good way. "Tris, of course it's important! It's your birthday!" He reaches his hand out towards mine and squeezes it. "Since this is last minute and I have a feeling you have family plans tonight, I wanted to see if you would want to come over and I could cook you a nice dinner?"

I quirked an eyebrow at him. "You cook?" He laughs and shakes his head. "I would love to, but I have a party I have to go to tomorrow night. It's Christina's idea and trust me, if I could get out of it I would." The second bell rings and I end the conversation quickly. "If I have time, I'll try to come over tonight, but I can't make any promises. I'm sorry."

Once I get down to the cafeteria, I see that Christina is already seated at our table with her food. I grab a small salad from the salad bar and sit down next to her, giving her a small smile. "Everything good?" She asks, and I give her a reassuring nod.

"Yeah, everything's fine." Halfway through the lunch period, Tobias walks into the cafeteria and stands next to the other two teachers monitoring the cafeteria.

I feel bad that I can't celebrate my birthday with him, but my family is important and I kind of owe it to them to have one night with me because of the apartment. And I knew that if I did ditch my own birthday party, Christina and everyone would hunt me down and drag me, kicking and screaming, to the party.

After school ends, I follow Christina to the party supply store and follow her around like a child dragged to the grocery store by his mom. "Chris, I don't want to do this. I'd rather be home studying or something."

"Don't be such a party pooper, Tris! It's for your birthday. And besides, the boys are too busy with baseball practice and Marlene and Lynn are off watching them practice." She grabs a stack of blue plates and black plates and then matching cups. "Besides, we only need a few of the basics."

Once she's done shopping for supplies, I ditch her as quickly as I can and head home. My Dad's waiting for me when I get home and he gives me a tight hug and kisses the top of my head. "Happy Birthday, Beatrice."

I smile up at him. "Thanks, Dad." When I step back I see that he's in one of his work suits and I'm confused. "Why are you still dressed for work? Did you just get home?"

"Ah, no." His shoulders slump forward a little bit, throwing off his whole 'confident business-man' persona. "I have a last minute meeting I have to go to and it's going to take all night, sadly."

"But…me, you and mom were supposed to go to dinner."

"I know, and I am so sorry, Beatrice. But this is my job. I can't just tell them no. Besides, we can go to dinner another night. Maybe Sunday night?"

My face drops and I cross my arms across my chest. "And so it's just going to be me and Mom then?"

"Sadly this meeting also involves your Mother, so the two of us won't be home until late. Again, we're both really sorry, but I need to leave before I'm late."

He gives me one more kiss on the top of my head and then leaves through the front door.

I'm left staring after him, feeling more upset than I would have imagined. I mean, going out to dinner the night of my birthday was a tradition with my parents and myself. We did it all the time on Caleb's birthday when he was living at home and we did it every year on my birthday. I was more upset by the fact that they were so quick to accept the meeting. I'd seen them drop more important meetings for Caleb's birthdays or even for him whenever he had to do something for school.

For a few minutes I think about calling up Christina and asking her to hang out, but once I do, all I can think about is her dragging me to more stores for more supplies and maybe even trying to get me to set up for the party.

If she wanted the party, she could set it up.

So, I call Tobias instead. He doesn't pick up so I just leave a voicemail letting him know that I'm going to be coming over for a bit. I tell him that I'll explain when I get there.

After I hang up, I grab my car keys and head back outside and into my car. But as soon as I open my front door, I almost run straight into Al – his hand raised in a fist, as if he was about to knock on the door.

"Al? What are you doing here?" I slowly shut the door behind me as he takes a step back to make room between the both of us.

He rubs the back of his neck and shrugs. "I feel like I needed to apologize for how I've been acting these past few weeks. I've been a complete and total ass about…everything."

Crossing my arms across my chest, I nod. "Yeah, you have. Al, I don't understand what I did to make you mad at me? I wanted to help you."

"I know, and I'm sorry for how I reacted." He finally looks up at me and there's a small, shy smile on his face. "Does this mean I'm officially invited to your birthday party tomorrow night?"

I roll my eyes and smile at him. "You would have shown up anyways and you know it. Or Christina would've dragged you there."

Al stretches his arms out in front of him, gesturing for a hug. I groan dramatically and then hug him. He's much taller than me and much wider, so my arms barely wrap all the way around his body. His hug is familiar, one I've grown used to over the years. His scent of lemongrass and clean laundry envelop me in the same way they used to when we were in elementary school and he would hug me whenever I fell during hopscotch or jump rope.

"Where are you going?" He asks when he pulls away from the hug. "Dinner with your parents?"

Shaking my head, I grip my keys in my hand. "No, they both have work so I'm going to Caleb's. He and Susan invited me over for dinner because they heard about my parents." The lie rolls easily off my tongue and I'm surprised by my last second wit.

Without any argument, we say goodbye, he wishes me a happy birthday and then he heads toward his car. I give him a few seconds until his car is completely out of sight before I start my car up.

When I get to Tobias's apartment, I knock on the door and take a small step back, waiting for Tobias to open the door.

He opens the door and he's still wearing his work clothes. Tobias gives me a smile that makes my stomach drop and I return his smile. Without saying anything, he grabs my hand and pulls me into the apartment.

I'm immediately engulfed in the aroma of fresh, hot pizza and the large box is sitting on the kitchen counter. Right next to it is a small cake with vanilla icing.

"Because you notified me of your coming over too late, I didn't have any time to actually cook dinner. So I thought that a pizza would be good."

I look at the cake and then raise my eyebrows at him. He shrugs. "I picked that up last minute, too."

"What if I don't like cake?"

Tobias gives me an exasperated look. "Of course you like cake, everyone likes cake." I laugh and step towards him, wrapping my arms around his waist and resting my cheek against his chest.

"Thank you, Tobias. I needed this." He presses his lips against the top of my head and his arms tighten around me and I feel safe and happy.

* * *

**I am so sorry that this took forever to get up. My classes are ridiculous and I've been loaded with studying and homework and working. I've tried to write every night but it's difficult because I get so worn out. But I'm not giving up on the story and will try to post more often. But thank you so much for being patient and sticking with me.**


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter Seventeen

Even with a simple dinner like pizza, the night was still nice. It was nice to have him to be with since my parents weren't able to. I mean, obviously he didn't make up for my parents, but it was a pretty good distraction.

After we finished the pizza – well, Tobias finished it. I only had two pieces – and we had a piece of cake, we sat down on the couch and he turned on a movie. I didn't really pay too much attention to it; I was distracted by Tobias twisting his fingers through mine. I was reclined on the couch, my head on his lap while he was sitting up.

"So where's my birthday present?" I ask, looking up at him and giving him an innocent smile.

He gives me a look and tilts his head slightly. "And here I thought you didn't like making a big deal out of your birthday."

"I don't, but that doesn't mean I don't like presents." He shakes his head and stands up and disappears into his bedroom. I pull my legs into my chest and wrap my arms around them. "Alright, I know this is a really nice apartment and bigger than most sized apartments, but it should not take you this long." Pushing myself off the couch, I start to walk towards his bedroom, but then he steps out with a bag behind his back.

He holds the bag out – it's a small white bag with black and green stripes on it – and says, "I went out after school ended and got this for you. It was last minute since you, you know, didn't tell me about your birthday." He winks at me.

I took the bag and opened it. Inside was a small black box and when I opened it, there was a necklace resting on the pillow. It had a simple silver chain with an opal stone hanging off the chain. It was simple but so beautiful, I was almost breathless.

"Tobias…" I run my finger over the stone very lightly, afraid to smudge it. "It's beautiful."

He motions for me to hand him the box and when I do, he takes the necklace out of the box and holds it out. I turn and pull my hair out of the way as he fastens the piece around my neck. His fingers brush lightly against my collarbone and I shiver slightly.

When I turn back to face him, he has a slightly distant look on his face. "Thank you, Tobias. I love it." I wrap my arms around the back of his neck and stand on my tip-toes to give him a kiss.

The kiss sends a wave of warmth through my body and I feel butterflies in the bottom of my stomach. "Happy birthday." He murmurs against my lips, wrapping his arms tightly around my waist and pulling me against him.

The sound of a vibrating cell phone breaks the moment and I see my phone on the table, the screen lighting up with Christina's name and picture. "Tobias…" I break the kiss and go to grab my phone, but Tobias keeps an arm around my waist, pulling me back towards him. "Tobias, I have to answer it. It's Christina and if I don't answer she'll freak out." I sound irritated but I'm smiling and I can't stop smiling.

"Let it go, she'll be fine." His lips are at my throat, my collarbone, and under my jaw.

I shake my head, maneuvering away from his lips and hold. I have just enough time to grab my phone and hit the talk button before he has his hold on me again. His hand presses into my side, right under my ribs, causing me to burst into laughter. I quickly smack his hand away, ducking away from him.

He presses his lips together, fighting off a smile. When he opens his mouth to say something, I hold a finger up to my lips effectively shushing him. "Hey, Chris. What's up?"

"Tris, where are you? I thought you'd be coming over after you had dinner with your parents!" There are voices in the background and I'm assuming that they belong to Will and most likely Uriah.

Tobias wraps his arms around me from the back, this time his grip is looser, but his lips are at my neck again. My knees go slightly weak, but he's got a tight enough grip on me that I don't fall. "I-I never said that I was doing that. You assumed it."

"Hang up." Tobias says, his voice low. I shush him but it didn't help; Christina still heard.

"Are you with someone? Tris, who are you with?" She sounded mad at first, but then her natural curiosity took over. "Are you with a guy? Who is it?"

I couldn't help but groan and roll my eyes as she continued to question me. Honestly, I didn't understand how she could think of so many different versions of the same exact question.

"Goodbye, Christina! I'll be there tomorrow night, I promise." I quickly end the conversation before Christina can say, ask or demand anything else. Tossing my phone onto the couch, I turn to face Tobias, who fixes me a look. His hands move to rest on my hips. "You realize that Christina now knows I'm with someone, right?"

He shrugs and smirks. "Well, she wouldn't have gotten curious if you weren't ticklish, which – by the way – I was not aware of until right now." One of his hands starts to slide up my side and I smack it away, stepping away from his hold.

He's laughing and I cross my arms over my chest, glaring at him. Tobias extends his arms towards me, almost like he's going to hug me, but then he stops and reaches into his back pocket grabbing his cell phone.

When he glances at the phone screen, his face drops and I see his jaw clench. "Tobias? Is everything okay?"

"Give me five minutes." He disappears into the bedroom and my stomach twists in a bad way. I don't like this. Whoever he is on the phone with, it can't be good at all. While I'm waiting for Tobias to get off the phone, Christina sends me a text message telling me when to be at Uriah's tomorrow and then sends a follow-up text message warning me that she's going to be questioning me about the guy I'm with. Great.

After about twenty minutes, I start to grow concerned. Okay, so maybe he's just on the phone with Zeke and they're telling stories or maybe he's on an important call with a colleague, but that doesn't stop me from knocking on the door.

I poke my head in and see Tobias at the foot of his bed, hunched over with his clenched fists other either side of his head. I slowly walk over to where he's seated and gently place my hand on his shoulder. He flinches slightly, more surprised by my sudden appearance than anything, and then he unclenches his fists and rests his hand on top of mine. Without me even asking him, he looks up at me, his eyes both sad and angry, and says, "My Dad called…He wants to visit." Had I never known about his background and history with his father, I may have considered this a good thing. A father coming to see his son after multiple years? That was a theme most cliché movies thrived on. But I _did _know about Tobias's past and I knew that his father coming to visit was not something anybody would put in a movie.

"You don't have to see him, Tobias. You're an adult and you have the right to say no to him." He shakes his head and it hits me. "You don't want to tell him no…" I say slowly, trying to grasp the words. "You want to see your father."

He lets go of my hand and stands up, pacing towards the window and then back to where I stand. "I don't want to see him, but a part of me – a sick part – wants to know if he's changed. I haven't seen him in years, Tris. Maybe he's changed, maybe he's different. There's a note in his voice that says he wanted to continue his train of thought, but didn't. But from the look in his eyes, I can tell that he's actually hoping he's changed. As much as he hates him for what he did to him and his mother, but he is still his father and he's hoping he changed. "Maybe losing me and my Mom changed him…"

He's standing in front of me again and when he says that, I can't help but throw my arms around him, crushing myself to his chest. "Tobias…" I feel his arms wrap around me tightly and he presses his lips to the top of my head.

I know how much he probably wishes his father did change, but part of me knew that someone didn't change that easily. Sometimes it took more than losing someone to change. The person would have to want to change and I had a feeling that Tobias's father was a lot like him – stubborn.

"Would you…would you come with me?" He asks, his arms still holding me to him so that I couldn't see him. "When I go to meet him, will you come with me? I…I need you there, Tris."

Something flares up inside me, hearing him admit that he needs me. I pull back from his arms and look up at him. "Why me?"

He takes a deep breath and brushes a strand of hair away from my forehead, giving me a sad smile. "If someone is there, someone he considers a stranger, there's less of a chance of him acting out or saying something that he shouldn't. And you make me stronger."

And then he kisses me. The kiss starts out soft, his arms wrapping tightly around my waist, my body bowing against his, and then he deepens the kiss.

Anxiety starts to build up and I realize it's because of what we're doing. Obviously not the kissing, we've done this before and I like it – a lot. It's the kissing in his bedroom that freaks me out, the part that typically happens after the kissing starts. I can't do that – I'm not ready.

When I pull away, Tobias looks hurt and I feel bad for a moment before speaking up, "I'm really sorry, Tobias. But I can't…I can't do this."

My eyes glance towards his bed and then back to him. He follows my glances and then looks back at me. "Oh – that." He gives me a soft smile, cupping the side of my face. "Tris, I would never, ever force you into doing something you don't want to."

Remembering his earlier question, I give him a small smile and place my hand over top of his. "I'll meet your father with you. Whatever you need, I'm there."

"You're amazing."

I roll my eyes and pat his hand. "It's about time you realized that."

He groans and drops his hands, turning around. It seems like he's going to walk out the room but instead he turns back around and grabs me by the hips, pulling me towards him. "I'm slow on things sometimes." He grins and then kisses me.

* * *

**This is really short and it's up really late and I'm really sorry about that. I've been drowning in papers and homework and studying. I've tried to write more, but my days are mainly taken up by classes and studying. **

**I'm probably going to be moving at a much faster pace now because I want to get further into the story without adding too many unnecessary chapters.**


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter Eighteen

When I promised Tobias that I would be there for him when his dad came to visit, I thought I would have a few days, if not a week. But apparently he meant that his father would be coming into town the following day.

I already hated him for being a last-minute planner.

Another major problem I faced that day was the party Christina had planned. I'd promised her over and over again that I would be there for it and now I was going to have to tell her I couldn't make it. I knew I should talk to her in person but I knew how angry she was going to be and if I faced her, I would cave in.

Tobias was in the shower and I had stepped into the living room for some privacy. I dialed Christina's number and she picked up on the first ring. "You better be calling me to tell me you're currently out at the store shopping for a nice outfit for your birthday party tonight."

Sighing, I run my hand through my hair. "I can't make it tonight and I'm really sorry."

"Tris! It's your own birthday party! What the hell do you mean you can't make it?" I could practically hear the frown that was most likely plastered on her face right now. "You told me you'd be able to make it, Tris!"

"I know, Chris, and I'm so insanely sorry. But something came up and I have to deal with it. If I had a choice in the matter, I would be at the party…"

She interrupts me. "Why do I have a feeling there isn't a problem and you just don't feel like coming to the party. This is about the guy you were with last night, isn't it?"

"No! I mean…yes, it is. But it's important and I promise I will explain as much as I can to you tomorrow."

Christina didn't even respond to that, instead she just hung up with an irritated sound on the other side of the line. I gripped my phone tightly in my hand and wrapped my arms around myself. She's not mad at me; she's just…upset that the guest of honor won't show up to her party. But what does it matter if I show up? She can always just make it into a normal party – she's done that kind of thing before. It's what she's good at.

"Is everything okay?" I turn around, startled, to see Tobias standing in front of his bedroom door with a towel wrapped around his waist. His hair looks almost black because of the shower water and his chest is bare.

My gaze lingers on his chest for a moment before he clears his throat. When I look up at him, he's smiling. "Uhh, I just got off the phone with Christina. I told her I couldn't make it tonight and she's upset. At least – I hope she's upset and not mad at me, because when Christina's pissed she can hold a grudge. I've seen her hold grudges for years over the smallest, stupidest things and –"

"Tris." Tobias interrupts my rambling, walking towards me. He places his hands in the curve of my waist and I can feel my heart beating through my chest. "Calm down, you're nervously rambling."

I cover my face with both my hands and groan. "I'm such a terrible friend."

"Hey, it was your birthday party. You're allowed to skip it if you want."

A small smile spreads over my face. "Yeah, but that doesn't make me a better friend. It just makes me a liar."

"One small lie won't ruin a lifetime of friendship." I didn't really have anything to say to that because he was kind of right. I knew she would be mad at me – really mad – that I ditched her for Tobias. After a few minutes, he speaks up again. "I should probably go get dressed. We need to leave in a bit. Unless you changed your mind about this?"

I give him a knowing look. "That's not a question for me and you know it. You can do this, Tobias. You're strong and regardless of whether or not your father's an asshole, you're the bigger person and can walk away."

He looks like he's thinking about it and then he drops his hands from my waist and heads into the bedroom, shutting the door behind him.

I sit down on the couch, running my hands through my hair, frustrated. The thing that bothers me the most right now, is the fact that I'm more worried about how Christina will act around me after this weekend rather than worrying about the fact that I am meeting Tobias's estranged, asshole father for the first time.

When Tobias came out of his room, he had on a black Henley and a pair of dark jeans. I gave him a look and he glanced down at his outfit and then back up at me. "What? Is there something on my shirt?"

I stood up, shaking my head. "No, but I thought you would've dressed a little more…nicer." Not that I didn't like his outfit. Personally, I thought his shirt fit him very, very well.

He shakes his head, looking perfectly at ease with his attitude and outfit. "This is fine. I figured since he didn't feel the need to contact me at all, I really don't need to put an effort into looking decent for him."

His logic seemed kind of childish, but I wasn't really in the mood to argue with him, so I just shrugged it off and went into the bedroom to change. I had packed clothes before I came over, but it wasn't really "meet the parents" nice. It was an oversized, dark blue sweater with black jeans. I mean, it was a nice outfit – but according to Tobias, probably way too nice for meeting his father.

We were apparently meeting up at his father's house, which was surprisingly close to my neighborhood. It made me nervous that someone would see us together but Tobias reassured me that nobody really paid much attention to his house and what happened there.

When we got to the house, we sat in Tobias's truck for a few minutes. I waited for Tobias to move or to say something, but he just sat there staring at the steering wheel.

"Tobias." I reach my hand for his and grip it tightly. "You can do this. I am right here by your side and I know that you can deal with seeing your father once for a few hours."

He looks over at me and his hand tightens on mine. He takes a deep breath and then nods. "Let's do this."

I drop down from the passenger seat and walk around to Tobias's side. He wraps an arm around my waist and we walk to the front porch. The house itself is kind of plain – one floor rancher, white siding. There's barely any front décor besides a small half-dead plant on the ground.

Tobias's father opens the door and I'm struck by how similar he and Tobias look. The only noticeable difference is the graying hair in the older man, the straight nose and the bit of a beer belly going on. Otherwise, they had the same eyes and same stature – but his father's was one that made me uneasy. "Tobias…" He doesn't smile, simply nods at his son and then his eyes narrow at me. "And you are?"

"This is Tris." Tobias answers his father before I even have a chance to open my mouth. "She's my girlfriend."

_Girlfriend. _

My stomach flips at the word and I feel like if he had introduced me as his girlfriend to anyone else, I might have blushed and smiled. But all I could think about was what this man in front of me did to him and I can't smile – I'm too busy trying to hold back the anger from my expression.

His father's scrutinizing look both irritates me and makes me suddenly feel like hiding behind Tobias. "You look familiar…"

"Are you really going to make us stand outside all night?" Tobias snapped. Both his father and I looked at him in surprise. I gripped his hand tighter, reminding him that I was right there with him.

I was here for him.

His thumb brushed over my knuckles and I felt his hand loosen up, not as tight as it had been earlier, as his father stepped aside to let us inside. The inside out of the house matched the outside – it was decorated to the bare minimum. He really had no sense of decoration or color. There were a lot of neutral colors surrounding me and I felt like I was in an office rather than a home.

When we sat down to eat, Tobias's father was still staring at me with narrowed eyes. I was feeling self conscious under his gaze and wanted so badly for him to stop staring at me. "You really do look familiar, Tris. Have we met before?"

I shrug my shoulders, staring at the chicken on my plate. "If we did I don't remember."

"Prior!" He smacks his hand on the table, startling me. Tobias's hand shoots out and grabs my knee under the table, squeezing it tightly – protectively. "You're Andrew and Natalie Prior's kid!" Tobias's hand doesn't loosen up again. "And there's another one…Caleb. But if he's the one I remember, you have to be a lot younger than him."

I don't say anything to him, instead I glance at Tobias from the corner of my eyes, not one-hundred percent sure of what I should say to that.

"How old are you?" His 'ah-ha!' moment is over, his dark eyes – so, so similar to Tobias's – staring at me, almost through me.

Tobias finally speaks up, but his voice is tense like he's speaking through his teeth. "That is none of your business, Marcus."

Marcus shoots a glare at his son. "Are you kidding me? She's a child, Tobias! You are dating a child! This is Evelyn's fault. Had she not had that damn contract drawn up I would've been allowed into your life and would've raised you better."

"Don't you dare say her name! You have absolutely no right to say anything about her. She is a better parent than you could even imagine yourself to be! She had that restraining order drawn up for a reason – because you are a drunken ass! You hurt her – us – and didn't feel bad about doing it."

I grip his hand tightly, trying to pull his attention away from his father. "Tobias…" But he just shakes his head, shooting daggers at his father.

Marcus looks offended. "I should call the cops."

Tobias laughs a mirthless laugh and shakes his head, standing up. "You do that and I can easily say that you violated the restraining order and I'm pretty damn sure that they would believe me over you."

From his lack of argument, I knew that Marcus couldn't find fault in his logic. They would believe Tobias over Marcus.

Tossing his napkin on the table, Tobias shoves his chair back and holds his hand out for me. I take it carefully and let him pull me towards the front door. Behind us, Marcus is threatening Tobias but he doesn't chase after us.

The front door slams behind us as we head back to the truck. Tobias still helps me up into the passenger's seat, his face almost red from anger, and shuts the door a little harder than necessary.

Once he's in his seat, he grips the steering wheel tightly, his knuckles turning pale white. "Tobias…" I finally speak up, finding my voice. "Tobias, it's alright. It's fine." I reach for his hand, trying to loosen it up. "I'm right here, look at me." He's glaring ahead of him, his jaw clenched tightly. "Tobias!" He finally looks over at me and his face softens a little, some of the anger gone. I stretch over the center console and place my hands on either side of his face, just in case he tries to look away. "Don't think about him. Ignore everything he said. You are a much better person than he ever will be." I keep my focus on him, as if I can force him to believe what I'm saying.

After a few moments, he places his hands over top of mine and just nods. He nods and then pulls my hands away from his face and turns back to face the road. Starting the car up, he pulls away from the curb while I just stare at him, confused.

The drive back to his apartment is silent, the air a mixture of my confusion and worry and his anger. He doesn't grip the steering wheel tightly anymore, but his back is still rigid and his jaw still has an angry set to it.

He doesn't do anything until he's in his apartment and I shut the door behind us. I watch him carefully, worried. Tobias takes a few steps into the living room and I can see his back muscles tighten angrily. His shoulders move up and down when he breathes, his breathing loud. "Tobias…" I speak slowly, scared.

Suddenly, something goes flying across the room towards the wall. It isn't until the object falls – leaving a noticeable dent in the wall – that I realize it was his cell phone.

Tobias is leaning over the back of the couch, gripping it tightly and digging his fingers into the cushions. I walk over to him, slowly, and his shoulders shake with silent sobs.

_Oh, no. Tobias doesn't cry. No. He shouldn't be crying._

I wrap my arms around his waist, resting my chin in the middle of his back. He stiffens at my touch, but doesn't try to move away or try and push me away; he just continues to silently cry while I hold him.

"You're a much better man than he is, Tobias. Don't you dare think anything else." I mumble into his back. "He just wanted to get a rise out of you."

When he finally speaks, he says, "I thought he would have changed." He shakes his head, his hands tightening on the cushions again. "I thought…time would do him good. I was wrong. I was so, so wrong."

Shaking my head, I force him to turn around. "You couldn't have known what he would be like! You haven't seen him in years. None of this is your fault." He looks at me, his gaze not as focused as before.

"He's right…" Tobias mumbles, barely loud enough for me to hear. I shake my head, about to tell him that he's wrong and that his father is wrong, but he keeps talking. "He's right. I shouldn't be with you. We shouldn't be together. You're my student and you're still in high school. It's wrong." His unfocused gaze becomes focused as he stares at me, his eyes intense. "It's completely and totally wrong and inappropriate and I know that. I've always known that. But I don't care. That's the worst part! I don't care! I should care because of what can happen to us, but I don't." Suddenly, it's not my hands gripping his wrists; it's his hands gripping mine. "You know why I don't care?" I shake my head. "Because I love you, Tris. I love you."

* * *

**I realize how late this is up, but it's very close to the end of the fall semester so I've been overworked with papers and tests and presentations. But, I have been trying to write as much as I can and I know that this chapter both Tobias and Tris were a little out of character from how they are in the books, but I liked it and I thought it made it a little more interesting and realistic. **

**Anyways, I have finals next week so the next chapter may not be up during the week, but I intend to post a few chapters over winter break. Honestly, thank you all so much for sticking through this with me and still following the story. It means a lot to me.**


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter Nineteen:

Tobias told me he loved me. Tobias loves me.

Part of me was overjoyed and feeling like I was walking on air, but another part of me was upset because those words weren't something to take lightly and I didn't have anyone I could tell. I couldn't go to my Mom and tell her how the guy I'm dating told me he loves me and I couldn't go to…_Christina._

I totally forgot that I promised her I would explain everything to her. When Tobias and I were first together, I didn't really think telling her would be too bad. The only thing that had held me back was the constant fear that someone would find out, but now? Now we only had three months left of high school and I wasn't too worried about anyone finding out.

But telling Christina this might hurt our friendship. I've held this from her for months and she would hate me for it. How supportive of it would she be? She had to understand how I was feeling – she felt the same for Will.

I spent the night again at Tobias's and called Christina, telling her I would meet up with her later the next day.

After leaving Tobias's apartment, I headed into Chicago to a large apartment building. It was the apartment building where Christina and I would be living for the next four years after graduation – maybe even longer if we were lucky. I told Christina to meet with me there so that we could check out the apartment while I talked to her.

She beat me there and was looking out the large windows that covered the entire east wall, overlooking the city. Honestly, if I wasn't shaking from nerves, I would have no problem admiring the apartment.

Before I even have a chance to say hi, Christina speaks up. "I get how you didn't want a big party for your birthday, but ditching me at the last minute was so uncalled for." She didn't even try to hide the irritation in her voice.

I sighed, knowing she was right. "Chris, I am really sorry about that. Something important came up and I couldn't really ditch it."

She turned away from the window to face me, her arms crossed over her chest. "And what was it that was so important? Or are you not allowed to say?" She sneered, her eyebrows pulled together in anger.

Taking a deep breath, I walk towards where she's standing so that I'm closer to her and can lean against the wall. "If I tell you this, you have to promise me not to tell anyone. Not even Will and especially not Al. Can you do that?"

She rolls her eyes, but she doesn't seem as angry as she was before. "You know me, Tris. I can keep a secret."

"I've been dating someone for the last few months." I confess, knowing I looked guilty. Christina just stares at me, dumbfounded.

"And? Why is that so bad?"

I bite my bottom lip. "Because it's Tobias – er, Mr. Eaton." She's silent for a few moments, looking like she's trying to gather her wits together.

When she finally speaks, she's stuttering, still surprised. "You're dating our teacher? Tris, what the hell are you thinking? Do you understand the amount of trouble he can get in? And forget about this apartment because if anyone ever finds out, Elmhurst will find out and they won't let you in!"

The anger in her voice was gone, replaced with concern. I felt slightly better knowing she was concerned for me and not angry.

"We've been extremely careful about it all and we never see each other near school."

She didn't look completely mollified, but she didn't push or try and talk me out of the relationship. She just kept her arms crossed over her chest and stared at me, her eyes narrowed slightly. "So this is a mutual thing? Like…you both want it?" When I nodded, she asks, "So how did this whole thing between you two start?" Her face drops for a second. "Please tell me you aren't sleeping with him to pass government!"

"No! God no, Chris! I would never do that!" I'm slightly offended she thinks I would stoop that low to pass a class, but I shake it off and give her the story. I tell her about him tutoring me and how he really was a good tutor and helped me pass all my tests. Then I start to tell her that we started to have tutoring sessions on the weekends and that after the first lacrosse game, he had given me a ride home after saving me from arguing with Peter. After that, I told her about how at Homecoming he had given me his phone number in case I ever needed to call someone and I did – when everyone was drunk and I needed to get home because I was drunk. After that it all kind of escalated from there.

Throughout the story, her face changes from intrigued to confused and sometimes even giving me a knowing look. "I feel like I should have caught on to this earlier! How did I never notice? How did you never slip up in front of me?"

"Because I was terrified of anyone finding out and accusing Tobias of anything. I care about him too much to let anything happen to him."

Christina frowns at me, all the earlier anger gone; leaving behind no trace that she was ever hurt I betrayed her. "Why didn't you ever tell me? Tris, you know I would never do anything to hurt you."

I shrugged, sitting down on the hardwood floor and pulling my legs into my chest. "I couldn't risk it. And honestly, I didn't know how serious it was."

She sits down in front of me, shaking her head. "Okay, I understand where you're coming from, but…it was still really shitty of you to ditch your own birthday party." She sounds serious, but she's smiling. "So…just how serious is it between you two?"

We talked about my relationship with Tobias for a bit and at first, I was confused by her curiosity, worried she was just trying to find fault in my logic and get angry with me again. But as time went on, I realized she was just morbidly curious and I couldn't fault her for that. After she was out of questions to ask me we started talking about the apartment. We discussed what kind of couch to get for the living room, whether we should mount the TV or have it sit on top of a bookshelf. Then we picked who got what room – which wasn't too difficult since they were both the same size and both looked out towards the city.

Christina had to leave after that, having to head to work. I didn't know what else to do, so I headed home.

My Dad was still at work but my Mom was in the kitchen, already preparing for dinner. I gave her a warm smile and hopped up onto the counter near where she was working on preparing chicken. "Hey, sweetie."

I watched her silently for a bit before asking her, "Mom, would you be okay with me dating someone older than me?"

She looked at me from the corner of her eye before she went back to slicing the raw chicken into smaller pieces. "Depends on how old?"

"Like…eight years?" I mumbled innocently.

She stops cutting the chicken and looks at me, curious. "Right now while you're in high school? I don't think it's very wise. Obviously once you graduate that's a whole different thing. But right now you're still a child, sweetie." I rolled my eyes at that. "Well, legally you're still a child." Her lips curl into her typical sweet smile. "You're much more mature than the kids in your class."

"Okay, but what if the relationship was good? Like…both people were extremely happy?" I _really _hope I wasn't giving anything away too easily.

Her attention is back on the chopping, but she still acknowledges my question. "I guess it depends on what their definition of happy was." She picks up the cutting board with the diced chicken on it and slides the meat into the pan of oil on the stove. "Why are you so curious about this?"

I shrug, pretending to pull at a string on my sweater. "There's just a rumor going around school that some girl is with an older guy. It's a stupid rumor." I say nonchalantly.

My mother laughs, brushing a piece of hair away from my face. "High school is full of rumors. But you never know, maybe some of them may be true." She pats my thigh. "Now get off the counter, you're too big to be up there."

I jumped down from the counter and was ready to head up to my room when my mom stops me. "Oh, by the way, when did you want to go shopping for a prom dress?"

Confused, I turn around the face her. "Prom dress?"

She nods, laughing slightly. "Of course, Beatrice! Prom's in a month. I'm actually surprised you haven't asked me to take you by now."

Was prom really in a month? That was impossible because that meant that graduation was only a few weeks away. I was graduating in less than two months.

"Can we go after dinner?" I asked. I knew she would take the question as my excitement but I really just wanted to get the dress shopping down and over with. My Mom agreed to it and I headed upstairs to start some of the homework I was putting off.

After dinner, my mother and I headed out to a couple of dress shops. Some of the bigger ones I avoided, simply because I knew a lot of girls were going to be getting their dresses from there. I chose to go to boutiques, some of them my mother suggested and I went there mainly to appease her.

When we got to one boutique, apparently owned by one of my mother's friends, I was trying on a floor length red sequin gown when my mom said, "I think that would look nice at the party next week."

I turned away from the mirrors and towards her. "What party?"

She gives me a small smile. "I'm so sorry to tell you so late. It's a party that your father has to go to and he wants all of us there. Caleb and Susan will be coming." Her small smile turns into a bigger one. "Your father is going to announce his running for mayor."

"Dad's running for mayor?!" She nods, still smiling proudly. I couldn't help it – her smile was contagious and I soon felt my chest welling with pride. I knew my Dad loved his job and I knew he wasn't one to actively go seeking for promotions, but him running was mayor was a huge step up and something I didn't ever think he would want. But I couldn't help but feel pride for him, and to see the love on my Mother's face. It was nice to know that even after all these years they still loved each other like they did when they first met.

After that, it was difficult to not be happy. I was happy to spend the extra time looking for a dress for my father's party.

For the party, I found a floor length, gray dress (at my mother's recommendation), but from middle of the thighs down to the floor, the fabric was sheer. The dress was short and clung to my body. The fabric around my shoulders was beaded with silver jewels and the sleeves were barely a quarter in length. My mother approved of it, saying that it wasn't too dressy but it also wasn't too casual.

It didn't take me too long to find my prom dress after that. Once again, it was a floor length dress, white dress with a halter neckline. The halter was embroidered with florals and dipped low in the back and from my waist down, white chiffon flowed out slightly.

I found a pair of black, strappy heels that would go with both dresses and after that, my Mom and I headed home. I was in too good of a mood to go to bed anytime soon so I took my dresses, hung them up in my closet and decided to call Christina.

We talked for a bit and made plans to go furniture scouting for our apartment. After that, she said she had to go. She was with Will and he was getting frustrated. We both laugh and then hung up. After she hung up, I didn't know what to do so I pulled out my laptop and started going through the course catalog for my fall semester in college. I still had a few weeks until registration, but I wanted to get a head start and have a thought about what classes I could take.

The next day, Christina and I meet up in the parking lot as usual and walk to first period with Will and Al. Christina's telling me about how Will asked her to prom – she was complaining because it wasn't anything extravagant. They were apparently hanging out and she brought up having her prom dress and then he just asked if they were going together.

She was pouting a little, but one joke from Will made her smile again.

We were all sitting together during first period in our usual seats, Uriah and Lynn joining us. Christina was talking to Uriah and Lynn, Will listening to them. Al and I were talking about some term paper than was coming up for our physics class.

"So are you planning on going to prom?" Al changes the subject, rubbing his hands together like he was trying to keep them warm.

I nodded. "Yeah, I just bought my dress last night."

He nods his head a few times, looking a little awkward. "Do you think you would want to go to prom with me?" He asks and then adds, "Just as friends, I mean."

I thought about it for a few moments. "Just as friends?" When he nods, I give him a reassuring smile. "Sure, it'll be fun."

I wasn't too concerned with Al asking me to prom, I mean – he clarified that it was just as friends. And what was so wrong with going to prom with one of your best friends? Besides, the guy I really wanted to go to prom with couldn't actually go.

That Friday, I stayed after Government and told my friends that I had a few questions about the test from earlier in the week. Christina looked at me knowingly – she even wiggled her eyebrows at me, making me roll my eyes. I packed up my book bag slowly, waiting until the last few people had left the room and then I walked up to Tobias's desk.

"So I wanted to talk to you about prom…" I started off. He looked down at me, confused.

He crossed his arms over his chest and then gives me a small smirk. "Do you want a wrist corsage or do you want a bouquet?" His tone was joking and I slapped his chest playfully. "I'm kidding, seriously. I am sorry that I don't have the privilege of taking you to your senior prom. I feel bad."

"Tobias, its fine. I'm going with a bunch of my friends – Al actually asked me to go with him earlier this week. I'll be with friends all night and I won't be stuck thinking about you." I joke, pressing my lips together to fight back the smile.

Tobias fakes a hurt expression. "Ms. Prior, I am truly wounded." We both laugh and then the warning bell rings, snapping us both out of the moment. I turned to leave, but Tobias grabs my hand effectively halting me. "Can you come over tonight? I have to ask you something and we can't really talk about it here." His thumb brushes over my knuckles, sending electric shockwaves up my arm.

"Yeah, I'll be over after dinner." I quickly hurried out of the class as students began to flood in.

Later that night, after I helped my Mom clean up dinner, I gave her an excuse about having to finish a project with Marlene.

I felt bad lying to her, but I couldn't tell her. My parents were the last people I would ever be able to tell. Besides, both my Mom and Dad were extremely busy with my Dad's Mayoral campaign and having them worry about their daughter dating someone beyond her years wasn't a necessary burden.

Arriving at Tobias's apartment, I let myself in with the key he had made for me. I shut the door and walked into the living room to find him lounging on the couch and watching the nightly news.

I stalked carefully behind the couch and then wrapped my arms around his shoulders, leaning around to kiss him on the side of the mouth. "Surprise."

"Hey, I didn't hear you come in." I climb over the back of the couch to sit next to him. He's still in his earlier work clothes of black pants and a now un-tucked white button down.

"What did you need to talk about?"

He groans, pushing himself up into a better position and then turns and faces me. "You're going to be at the gala tomorrow night, right?" When I nod, he continues. "I understand that we're supposed to be keeping our relationship on the down low, but I was thinking that maybe the least we could do is tell your parents?"

My mouth drops open with an audible pop and I'm speechless. "What…no…we…I mean…what are you talking about?! Have you lost your mind?!" I'm no longer sitting on the couch; I'm standing in front of him, completely lost. "Tobias, I haven't told any of my friends," besides Christina, but I left that out. "I've lied to everyone I care about for months because I knew how dangerous it was to your job! Why now? Why do you want to do this now? I graduate in a month!"

I was babbling and I knew it, but I couldn't stop. How could he possibly want to do this now? And what would telling my parents at the gala do? Besides possibly make a huge scene!

Tobias grabs my hands, abruptly cutting off my internal rant and forcing me to look at him. "I'm tired of hiding this, Tris. At school, that's one thing. But don't you hate being stuck in this apartment and not being able to go on actual dates? I'm an adult – and technically so are you. Adults don't hide their relationships."

"We can't tell my parents tomorrow night. It's stupid!" A look crosses his face that makes me feel like I hurt him. Maybe I did. I take a deep breath. "Just…I can't do it tomorrow night."

He's still frowning, his hands gripping both of mine. I take a deep breath and kneel in front of him. "I promise we can tell them. Just…tomorrow isn't a good night, okay? There's a lot going on for them and I don't need to add our relationship on top of everything they're dealing with. It'll be too much."

"Promise?" He asks, brushing his fingertips along the side of my face and cheekbone.

I nod, giving him a smile. "I promise."

* * *

**I totally apologize for this taking so long to be updated. I could lie and say that I've been really busy but in all honesty, I've been sleeping a lot since break started.**

**Also, I got a new laptop for Christmas which means that I don't have Microsoft word on it yet. So the next chapter may not be up for a bit, at least until I can get my laptop set up and everything. I apologize ahead of time and will try to do my best to get it up as soon as possible.**


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter Twenty

Later that Saturday night, I sat cross-legged on a chair in my Mother's bathroom. I watched her reflection in the mirror in front of me while she continued to curl my hair. She had her brown hair pulled up into an elegant braided bun, her eyes outlined in a dark brown tone of eye shadow. It made her look younger, prettier than she normally looks.

I was chewing on my nails when my Mom glanced at me in the mirror, placing the hot curling iron the marble countertop. "Is everything okay?" She asks.

I shrug, "Just nervous."

She smiles, placing her hands gently on my shoulders. "I think your father is nervous enough for the entire family and then some."

It was true. He had been practicing his speech all day long. He was constantly talking himself as he walked around the house, pacing in the living room and dining room and then pacing around his bedroom at the moment while getting ready. His flashcards were in his hands, repeating his speech over and over and over again.

I excused myself from my Mom's bathroom once she was done with my hair, and then headed into my room to get dressed. I wasn't a makeup person, so I applied some lip balm and then pulled my gray dress on, staring at my prom dress that was hanging in my closet.

From time to time I would think about Al asking me to prom and how I really wish I had the chance to go with someone else.

Not that I wasn't grateful or happy that Al asked me! Of course I was, he's my friend! But I mean…if I was going to go to my senior prom, I wanted to go with someone I was in a relationship with.

I sat down on the edge of my bed and slipped on my heels. Grabbing my clutch and phone I headed downstairs to meet with my parents. There was a car waiting for us and I followed behind my parents, barely listening to my Mom reassuring my Dad that he was going to be fine and that he pretty much had the speech memorized and didn't even need his flashcards.

As soon as we arrived at the gala, my parents were swept into conversations about political business and the likes. I was immediately left alone and already wanted to leave. The least my parents could have done is have dragged Caleb along. But no, he was an adult with a fiancée and they were too busy planning their wedding – which is complete bullshit because I know Susan would be the only one planning it. Caleb would probably be agreeing with her on every single detail, not caring what the color scheme was or what kind of detailing the napkins had.

"Well, aren't you a sight for sore eyes?" The familiar voice makes me jump, the voice a little closer than I had felt. I feel a pair of warm hands on my waist and my heart skips two beats.

I try to hide my smile, ducking my head and forcing my hair to form a curtain around the side of my face. "You do realize that we are in public, right? We could get caught…" I turn around to face Tobias and I'm surprised to see him in a tux. I'm speechless for a few seconds before I look up at his face. "And you look very handsome."

His hands are still on my waist and I place my hands on his forearms. "Seriously, Tobias. You can't…not here." My smile disappears and so does his.

"Tris, please." He begins, but I cut him off.

"No. I am not having this argument here, Tobias! I told you, tonight is really not a good night. Can you please just…leave it at that?"

His hands drop from my waist and he takes a few steps back, leaving a respectable amount of distance between us. "Fine. So it'll be like the last gala. We disappear for a few hours, unnoticed, hide out in one of the empty rooms completely out of everyone's sight?" He didn't sound happy at all. He sounded very irritated.

"Tobias…" I start, but he just shakes his head.

"You're not ready. I respect that."

I narrow my eyes at him, giving him a hurt look. "Do you?"

Before he can reply, an older woman calls out my name and pulls my attention away from him. I excuse myself from him and turn to face the old woman and listen to her as she begins to recount days when I was young and ran around my father's office with a stuffed giraffe in my hand. "That thing was always ripped! It was almost as if I was more that poor giraffe's surgeon than your father's assistant!" I try to pay as much attention as I can to her stories, but I'm drifting in and out of focus, looking from her to Tobias who took position by a group of men slightly older than him.

Finally, I interrupt the older woman. "I hate to be rude, but I really need to go find my parents. I am so sorry and it was so nice to see you again!" I turn away from her and hurry through the crowd, trying to pick out any familiar faces.

Someone grabs my arm and I'm prepared to step on the person's foot until I turn and realize it's my Mother. "Beatrice, there you are! I've been looking all over for you!"

"Sorry, I had some of Dad's old friends talking to me. Telling me old war stories." I give her a sheepish smile and she finally smiles and laughs.

"Okay, well it's time for your father's speech and then he wants you around afterwards when he's talking to some important people." I nod and follow her towards the front of the crowd.

When we get to the front of the crowd, I try to scan the crowd of tuxedos and fancy dresses to try and find Tobias, but I can't see over most of the people, even in heels. I would turn around, but that would've given me away to my Mom and she would've started looking where I was and it wouldn't end up the way I wanted it to.

"Tris? Tris Prior?" Both my Mom and I turn towards the voice and I'm slightly relieved and troubled to see Tobias standing behind us. "I didn't think you would be here tonight!"

My mother looks between the two of us, confused. "I just thought it'd be assumed." I turn to my mom. "Mom, this is Mr. Eaton. He's my Government teacher."

"Eaton? As in Tobias Eaton?" She questions.

He nods and extends his hands towards her. "The exact one. And I have to tell you that Tris is such an amazing student. She's so dedicated and has so much potential. It's a shame that she didn't get into Brown." I look at him, trying to figure out what he's doing.

My mom turns to look at me. "You told him about Brown?"

I shrug. "There are a few teachers I told. It would've come out sooner or later."

Tobias continues to talk, unfazed. "Has she told you about us?"

_No! I cannot believe him! He was not doing this here, right now! _I wanted to slap him and yell at him, but I had to settle for glaring at him, clenching my hands into fists.

"What about you two?" My mom looks to me for answers, but, thankfully, my father clears his throat at the microphone on the stage in front of us. I breathe a small sigh of relief and then I feel Tobias's hand brush against mine. I cross my hands in front of me.

My Dad begins his speech, starting with his job as just an intern in the Mayor's office when he was a young boy, not much older than me. Then he goes into how he went to college and majored in politics and then began a job in the mayor's office. He started as an assistant and climbed through the ranks. He talked about how he managed to raise a family and send one kid off to college while watching his youngest about to graduate high school. Somehow, through his entire speech, he never once sounded like he was bragging and he didn't sound nervous at all. The only evidence of his nervous was his slightly shiny forehead. Once he started in on what he could do for Chicago and how the city would benefit from electing him as mayor, I kind of zoned out.

The crowd begins to clap and it instantly snaps me out of my haze. I have no doubt in my mind that Tobias is still standing behind me, but I don't check. Instead, I watch as my father walks off stage towards us and my mother hugs him tightly, giving him a kiss. People are still clapping and offering him handshakes when he greets me with a tight hug.

Thankfully my parents are preoccupied for a vast majority of the night, constantly flocked by political figures that want to speak with my father and their wives want to speak with my mom.

I hover around them, worried that if I leave their side, Tobias might try to say something with me gone.

Until he approaches our little circle of people and squeezes in between me and my father. "Excuse me, Mr. Prior. Amazing speech." He shakes my dad's hand, giving him a smile. "But I was just wondering if I could borrow Beatrice for a few moments?" Without thinking, my Dad nods and then turns his attention back to the group.

Tobias wraps an arm around my waist and leads me away from the party and down a hallway. "Tobias…I don't want to argue tonight. Please." I was tired, my feet were killing me and truth be told – I wanted to go get a nice, greasy hamburger.

"Just, please hear me out." He opens a door, pokes his head in and then pulls me in after him, shutting the door. He stands in front of it so that I can't storm out.

Smart of him.

"I get how you don't want to tell your parents. I get how you're terrified of their reaction and I get how stressed your father is right now. But just…I'm so tired of hiding, Tris. I'm sick of it! I love you and you know that. And I want other people to know that too. I don't want to be stuck in some apartment all the time! I don't even feel like our relationship is real! We're hiding every time we're together. It doesn't feel like a real relationship and it makes me feel terrible. I hate doing this to you. I don't care about myself or how it might affect how people look at me, I care about you, Tris. I'm not lying to anybody, but you are. And one day, one of us is going to slip up and it'll come right back around to bite us in the ass. I want to protect you, but I can't do that if we're hiding all the time."

He takes a deep breath and I stare at him. I don't know what to say to him. I can't argue with him and I don't want to. He was right – I was lying to practically everyone in my life right now and I did hate it. I hated having to hide us. But still…the repercussions.

We stare at each other for a few moments – Tobias looking dejected and almost like he had a weight lifted off his shoulders getting all of that out.

"Can you just…stay until my parents are ready to leave? Please?" He nods and then steps towards me. When he does, I shove his shoulder, hard. "Did you really have to be a jackass to get me to comply, though?"

He rubs his shoulder, a faux-innocent look on his face. "I have no idea what you mean." Rolling my eyes, I let him tug me in towards him. He wraps his arms tightly around my back, crushing me against his chest.

We stay like that for a few minutes. I didn't want to let go, he was my safety. He was warm and strong and I felt like nothing could happen to us while he held me tightly like this.

Unfortunately, we had to return to the party. Tobias pressed his lips to the top of my forehead quickly before I left the room. I quickly found my parents and saw that the large crowd had died down dramatically. It seemed as if everyone had gone home in the few minutes we were gone.

My mom glances in my direction as I walk towards her, and she gives me a relieved smile. "There you are! We're getting ready to leave."

"Um, actually Mom, I was wondering if you'd mind if I left now? I'll meet you at the house?" When she gives me a concerned look, I give her a small smile. "My feet are killing me and from the looks of who dad's talking to, you'll probably be here another hour."

She chuckles at that and gives me a kiss on the cheek. I find Tobias as he's walking outside and I grab his arm, keeping pace with him as he walks. "Did you drive here?" When he nods I continue. "Good, you're going to take me home."

When he pulls up in front of my house, he leaves the truck running. "You're coming inside, Tobias." My words apparently startle him and he stares at me, dumbfounded. "Don't give me that look! You want me to tell my parents? Well, you're going to have to be there with me to tell them. I'm not doing this alone."

He shuts the truck off and is out of his seat and opening my door before I'm even unbuckled. He helps me down and grabs my hand tightly as we walk to the front door. "Just…sit in the living room until my parents get home. I don't want you to be the first thing they see when they walk in – they'll probably think you broke in."

Tobias nods and heads into the living room and I take the stairs two at a time, unzipping my dress as I climb the stairs. As soon as I'm in my bedroom, I step out of my dress and grab my sweatpants and a t-shirt, throwing them on.

As soon as I'm dressed, I hear my parents' car turn into the driveway and I hurry down the stairs. My hands are shaking and I feel like my heart is going to beat through my chest.

_Why am I doing this? Why am I actually going to go through with this? I'm risking Tobias's career…_

But when I look over at him, he's staring at me – no hint of fear or worry evident in his eyes. His face betrays nothing, except a small smile meant for me. He takes my hand in his tightly, squeezing it and I feel myself calm down a little.

I'm doing this for him. He wants me and he wants people to know that I'm his. I can stand up to my parents for us – for him. I love him.

The front door opens and I hear my mother's voice. "Beatrice? We're home!" I stand up, dropping Tobias's hand and watch as both my parents turn the corner into the living room. "Beatrice?" She speaks slowly, glancing behind me. "Mr. Eaton? What's going on?"

My father speaks up, recognizing the last name. "Eaton? Tobias Eaton? It's been so long! How are you?" Obviously my father was preoccupied earlier when Tobias shook his hand. Tobias stands up, crossing the room to shake my father's hand. "How are your parents – err, your mother?"

"She's fine. She's been in D.C. for a few months, so I haven't had much time to talk to her."

And then my father's expression changed to complete confusion. "I'm sorry, but why are you here?"

I hurried to Tobias's side, grabbing his hand. "Mom, Dad…Tobias and I wanted to…talk to you two."

My mother looked down at our hands and then back up at me, shock apparent all over her face and my father was completely lost altogether.

Taking a deep breath, I look at both my parents' faces. "Tobias and I are…together. We've been together for a few months."

I feel Tobias's hand tighten around mine as my words sink with my parents. My dad looks to my mom for an answer, but she's still in shock. She shakes her head, placing her hand over her heart. "Beatrice…he's your teacher!"

My Dad's head snaps in her direction at that, and then glares at Tobias. "Teacher?! He's your teacher?!" My father has very rarely raised his voice at me in my life, even as a child. But right now, he was on the verge of yelling and it scared me. He didn't yell. He looked up at Tobias, directing his anger at him now. "You're her teacher?! Do you have any clue what you're doing?! She's a minor!"

"Dad, I'm not a minor!" I snap. "And can you please just…hear us out? Please?!"

Both my parents shake their head. "Beatrice, you're a smart girl. How could you do this? Do you know how much trouble both of you can get in?" My mother speaks up. My father is still steaming, his face going red.

"Tobias, leave. Right now. And don't come back." My dad speaks up, his voice low but it was easy to see how angry he was. "Don't you dare come anywhere near my daughter or my family. If you so much as even look at her – even at school – I will have you arrested."

"Dad!"

"You are not to see him anymore, Beatrice!" The tone is final. I can't argue.

Tobias looks to me, helpless. I'm still gripping his hand tightly and I want to beg him to stay and to explain this to my parents. "Leave!" My father yells, pointing to the door. Helpless, Tobias loosens my hand from his and heads to the door.

Once he's gone, my father starts to take deep breaths. He's trying to calm himself down. My mother looks like she's on the verge of crying. "Beatrice, go to your room. Now." My Dad orders.

"Dad, please just let me explain…" I beg, tears beginning to form in my eyes. He shakes his head and crosses his arms over his chest. "I love him and we're happy! Does that not count for anything?! Please don't do this to me!" I beg, the waterworks starting.

Both my parents are quiet and I finally give up and stomp up the stairs. Slamming my bedroom door shut, I slide to the floor, pulling my legs into my chest. My chest heaves with heavy sobs and I can hear my parents talking downstairs.

"How could she do this?" My mom asks my dad. "You don't think he's pressuring her, do you?"

My father's voice is louder, angrier. "Of course he is! He's older than her! She wouldn't do this unless he was pressuring her!"

"She loves him, Andrew. She seems…happy. She's never been as happy as she has been these last few months." My mom defending me gave me a little hope, and I could almost picture her placing a calm hand on my father's arm, trying to soothe him. "I thought it was because she's graduating, but maybe, maybe he's had something to do with it. If he was pressuring her, she would have told someone or maybe even have shown signs that she wasn't happy – but she's not."

I hear my father exhale, irritated. "I don't like it. He's her teacher. He's in a position over her and he has more power than her. I know his parents – I've known him since he was a kid! I can't see…I don't understand it, Natalie." I'm almost hopeful that my father could have his mind changed, but then he speaks up again. "I don't want her anywhere near him ever again."

I get up, moving towards my bed and collapse onto it. Curling into a small ball, I pull the covers over my head. The sobs come faster this time, harder and louder.

A few hours later, I hear my door open slowly. Soft footsteps cross my bedroom floor and the bed sinks next to me. "Beatrice…" My mother's voice is near my head and she shakes me lightly.

I turn to face her and it's too dark in my room to see her face properly. "Leave me alone, please."

"Beatrice just…help me understand."

"Why? So you can have another reason to hate him?" I was being childish and petty, but this wasn't really fair.

She takes a deep breath. "Do you really love him?"

Her question takes me by surprise and I blink a few times, sniffling. "Yes, I do. I love him…a lot."

"I can't promise that this will be easy and that I'm okay with it. Because I'm not. I love you, sweetie. I still don't think it's wise. But I don't want to hurt you and I don't want to force you to not love him. I'm a little more open-minded than your father and I will try to…see it your way. But for now, it would be best if you didn't really…interact with Tobias for awhile. For your father's sake."

I knew she was trying to help me, but it really sounded like she just didn't want to be the bad guy in the situation. She was trying to be Switzerland. It wasn't fair and as much as I wanted to hate her for not taking my side, I couldn't blame her. She was never the one to be able to choose between her kids and her husband. She loved everyone equally.

"Just please think about it, Mom. He loves me, too. And he cares about me and my future. He's not pressuring me into anything. Please think about it."

She stands up and starts towards the door. "I will." She says and then shuts the door behind her, taking the last sliver of light with her.

* * *

**Oh, hey! Look who has another chapter up within two days! To be completely honest, I wrote this last night at like...2am because I was feeling the need to write. So if there's any major mistakes or if something doesn't make complete sense, it's because I should have been asleep. **

**Also, because I suck at describing clothing and stuff, the dress I had Tris wear to the gala was a Sherri Hill dress - **** style/32287/?from_page=6-115**


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter Twenty-One

To say that my parents were a little more overbearing in the weeks that followed that disastrous Saturday night would be an understatement. I was allowed to go to school and then I had to come right back home. Somehow, my Dad had me dropped from my Government class and I was put into a study period – my guidance counselor told me it was because I was over the amount of credits I needed. But I knew the truth and it pissed me off. Going a step beyond having me dropped from Government, my parents shut my phone off. I couldn't even call or talk to Christina in private – I had to make all my calls from the kitchen on the landline.

I was frustrated and angry and I didn't even get a chance to talk to Tobias and try to figure things out. I needed to talk to him.

My days typically consisted of me giving my parents the cold shoulder at breakfast and then stomping out the door to Christina's car – oh, that was another thing! I couldn't even drive myself to and from school. Nope. I was officially a second-grader again – no phone, no driving myself anywhere and having supervised phone calls.

One morning, the Wednesday before prom, I was finally done. I was so tired of being over supervised and having my parents watch me all day. I slammed the door when I got into Christina's car and she gave me a sad look. "I'm guessing you're still not off the hook?"

Shaking my head, I put my feet up on the dashboard. "No and I am so sick of it! I get how they're pissed at me. I'm pissed at myself now! But it's like they forget that I'm eighteen and legally an adult! I can do whatever I want whenever I want. It's been a month since I've seen or even talked to Tobias," Christina winced at his name, still not completely comfortable with my using his first name. "And at this point, I honestly wouldn't expect him to still see us as a couple. I wouldn't."

Christina shakes her head, making a quick turn into the drive-thru of a Starbucks. "Tris, they'll get over it. And if they don't – we graduate in three weeks and then we're off in our new apartment and going to college. They can't dictate your life after that."

"No, they just pay rent for that apartment and can easily cut me off." I mumble while Christina orders her normal coffee.

We get to school a little early so we sit in the parking lot, watching school buses pulling up to drop the students off. Christina leans her back against the door and stares at her coffee for a few seconds before looking up at me. "What if I covered for you?"

I look at her, confused. "What?"

She sits up, an arrogant smile playing at her lips. "What if you told your parents that you were coming over tonight to study for finals with me and you were probably going to crash for the night. I could pick you up and drop you off, I could even answer the phone when your parents call and give them updates." Her big, brown eyes are wide with excitement. "I could totally cover for you while you and…Tobias talk things out. Now, it may only be a onetime thing, but one night is better than waiting another month, right?"

I slap my hand over my chest, staring at her with a stunned expression. "Christina, when did you get so smart?" She rolls her eyes and then it's time to head inside before first period.

Christina drove me home after a very long day at school, and instead of leaving, she walked inside with me. My Mom was sitting in the living room, reading a book. She glanced up at the sound of our arrival and gave a bright smile to Christina. "Christina, hey sweetie! It's been so long."

"If you let me off house arrest you might get to see her around more often." I remark quietly, dropping my book bag on the floor.

Christina pinches my elbow, and returns my mom's smile. "Hi, Ms. Prior."

"Mom, Christina and I were planning on studying for finals together – you know, to keep each other in check and make sure we don't zone out – and we were planning on it taking all night. Would it be okay if I stayed at her house for the night? Just for tonight?"

My Mom put her book down and rubbed the bridge of her nose. "Christina will drive you to and from school tomorrow, right?" She asks, looking up at Christina.

"Definitely. I'll even make sure she eats all her eggs in the morning." Christina grins and my mother smiles at the joke.

Her attention turns towards me and she finally nods. "Fine, just for tonight." I feel like a weight was lifted off my chest and I jump up, running to where she's standing and I throw my arms around her neck, hugging her tightly.

"Thank you thank you thank you thank you!" I kiss her on the cheek and then we head up into my room, grabbing some clothes and other necessities and then we're out the door and in Christina's car before my Mom can change her mind.

I feel bad using Christina as a cover, but she doesn't seem to mind too much. Besides, we'll be living together for the next four years, maybe more. She could probably deal with me ditching her every once in awhile.

After giving Christina directions, we end up in front of Tobias's apartment building twenty minutes later and I'm smiling – for the first time in weeks, I'm smiling. I turn and give Christina a big hug. "Thank you so much, Chris. I owe you big time."

"Yes, you do." She hugs me back, tightly. "I love you."

"Love you, too!" I say and then, grabbing my bag, I climb out of the car and then head inside.

The elevator ride feels like it's taking forever and I'm bouncing on the balls of my feet. The elevator dings when it comes to a stop and then the doors slide open.

I reach into my bag and dig around for the key to Tobias's apartment. Without even knocking, I unlock the door and push the door open.

"Who the hell do you think you…?" Tobias comes storming around the corner from the kitchen, looking like he's ready to attack whoever broke into his house, and then stops dead in his tracks when he sees him. "Tris? How…?"

Seeing him again makes me feel like nothing in the past month ever happened. Like we were never separated. My stomach flips and then I scurry towards him, throwing my arms around him tightly. "I broke out. Don't worry; I don't think the wardens will be looking for me anytime soon."

"What are you talking about?" He sounds completely lost, but his arms tighten around my body.

"Christina is my alibi. We're studying for finals at her house for the night." I finally look up at him, smiling. "I needed to come see you. I'm so sorry about what happened that night and how my Dad freaked out."

He shakes his head, pulling away. "No, it's my fault. I was a complete and total jackass. I was pushing you to tell your parents. You weren't ready and they weren't ready." He turns away from me and starts to walk towards the living room. He twists his fingers together, his hands locked behind his head. "You have a few weeks left until graduation, I should've just…I shouldn't have pushed you to do it that night. I could have waited a little longer."

He sits down on the edge of the couch, dropping his head. "I'm not going to argue with you on that point – because you could have waited. But Tobias, you didn't push me into it. Okay, maybe you were a little pushy, but I'm my own person. I make my own decisions and I chose to tell them. I could've lied to you and to them. I could've said that I told them or come up with some excuse to tell you that they had too much work to do. But I didn't. I chose to tell them. This is not entirely your fault. It's split blame."

I walk closer to him, standing in front of him. "So what now?" He asks, looking up at me. His reaches his hands towards mine, pulling me in between his legs. I place my hands on his shoulders and shrug.

"We make the most of tonight and hope that maybe, just maybe we can pull this off a few more times before graduation."

He gives me a weary smile. "I'm surprised your father hasn't sent out security members to watch my building, or even stalk me all day."

I sigh, shaking my head. "My dad's pissed, yeah. But I mean, my Mom's coming around…sort of. She doesn't want to take sides in this and she said she'll take into account how I feel about you…"

He quirks an eyebrow at me. "And how do you feel about me?"

Dropping my head, I lightly brush my thumbs across the edge of the tattoo peeking out from his shirt. "You know how I feel about you." A laugh rumbles in his chest and he places one of his hands on my right wrist. Taking a deep breath, I look at him, at his dark blue eyes. "I love you."

"What, were you waiting for the right time to say it?" He jokes, and I roll my eyes.

"Yes and I figured that after escaping from house arrest after my parents ordered me to stay away from you is the absolute best time." I laughed, shaking my head.

I run my hands through his hair and he wraps his arms around my waist, pulling me in as close as possible. Leaning down, I press my lips to his and wrap my arms around the back of his neck, like a vise.

After a few minutes of kissing and him apologizing whenever he could, we were seated on the couch. I was leaning against his side and his arm was wrapped around me tightly. Some Star Wars movie was playing on the TV but I wasn't too concerned with focusing. "Can I be honest with you?" Tobias suddenly asks. He doesn't really wait for my answer. "This past month…when I couldn't talk to you or even see you, I was a mess. I was terrified that I was going to completely lose you. That I wouldn't get to see you again, even after graduation. Most nights, after work, I drank. A lot."

I interrupt him before he can go any further. "Please tell me you are not going to admit to cheating on me?"

He laughed at that, making me a little less worried. "No, absolutely not. But I did tell Zeke about us." He looks down at me. "I was drunk one night and it kind of just…slipped out."

"How'd he react?"

Tobias shrugs. "He was surprisingly chill about it all. He didn't really get angry or anything. He just asked if I knew what I was getting myself into and if I was completely sure about you." His arm tightened around me when he said that and I smiled.

"I can't even be mad at you for telling Zeke because I told Christina." When he looks at me, I go on to explain myself. "I kept ditching her and didn't have valid excuses so I told her. I mean, she was kind of pissed off at first but once I fully explained myself, she was cool about it."

_Besides asking me if I was sleeping with him to get good grades_. I decided to leave that little comment out, afraid of how he might react.

He nods, turning his attention back to the movie. After the movie ends, I expect that we're going to call it a night, but Tobias puts in another Star Wars movie. "Seriously? How many of these do you have?"

Smirking, he sits back down next to me, putting his arm behind my shoulders. "I have all of them." I stare at him. "What? I'm allowed to nerd out about things."

"You're a total dork." I mumble, shaking my head in amazement.

A few minutes into the movie, Tobias shifts and clears his throat. "So while you were on lockdown for the past month…what did you do?"

"Went to school, went home, and maybe went to dinner with my parents. I was on house arrest. I couldn't leave." I grumble, still angry over it.

"Do you think that your parents will ever completely come around to it?" He asks, his voice laced with anxiety.

I shrug, moving closer into his side. "I don't know. Either way, it won't matter after graduation. They won't have a say in our relationship."

Tobias sighs. "I don't want you to fight with your parents over us. You shouldn't have to distance your parents so that we can be together. It's not right. Trust me, you don't want to have your parents fighting."

When I look up at his face, it's almost like this Tobias was replaced with a younger Tobias. His face looks torn and his eyes are wide and innocent. I sit up on my knees, wrapping my arms around him as tight as I can. "I'm sorry, Tobias."

I feel his arm tighten around my waist and he presses his lips to my neck. The kiss sends shivers down my spine and I feel my heart start to accelerate.

"No distracting me." I breathe.

His lips are still at my throat. "What would I be distracting you from?" His lips move up my throat, to my jaw and then to the corner of my mouth. "Tell me and I'll stop."

"From being…clearheaded." I try to say, but it comes out in more of a whisper. "You're not playing…fair" I breathe.

He chuckles. "I've never really been one to play fair." He says when he finally pulls his lips from my neck.

I could truly spend the rest of the year wrapped in Tobias's arms and kissing him. I've never had feelings this strong for anyone and it scares the hell out of me. But it's also a rush. I'm happy – at least, around him I'm happy. I feel safe with him and I don't worry about keeping up any walls or watching what I say. Some, weird part of me is happy I didn't get into Brown because if I had, I would've had to move away from Tobias. At least with Elmhurst, I can still be with him and my family (even if they were being totally unfair).

The only problem was that I didn't want to have to hide my relationship from my parents. I didn't want to fight with them about this. I wanted my parents to be able to talk to Tobias and meet him, really meet him. I wanted them to accept our relationship like they had accepted Susan and Caleb's relationship.

It was going to take some time and a lot of pleading, but it was worth it. For Tobias, I would do it.

* * *

**I know this chapter was a lot shorter than the last, but hey, I got something up in a reasonable amount of time! Also, the next chapter is going to jump around a bit because it'll be from Tobias's perspective, so I apologize ahead of time for any confusion on that.**

**And for anyone who is interested in The Vampire Academy series, my next fic will more than likely be a VA one, if you're interested.**


	22. Chapter 22

Chapter Twenty-Two: Tobias's POV

"You leave my daughter alone. If you so much as look at her, I will have you arrested!" I casted Tris a worried glance, as her father continued pointing at the front door. I waited for her to say something, but when she didn't, I dropped her hand and left.

I got into my truck and started it up. A surge of emotions flowed through me and I slammed my hands against the steering wheel.

Frustrated, I pull out onto the road and head home. Honestly, I'm surprised I wasn't pulled over. Driving angry has never turned out well for me, I always tend to speed and normally there are cops around all the time, but tonight it was like they were all hiding.

Once I'm up in my apartment, I expected that I would start to calm down, but I don't. I can't. I pace back and forth in front of the large windows, clenching and unclenching my hands.

My phone keeps ringing from the coffee table. I know I should go check it to see if it's Tris, but I know it's not her. Her parents probably took her phone away.

The phone keeps ringing. "Shut up." I growl. Finally, the phone stops ringing. But twenty minutes later, there's a pounding on my door. Hope swells up in my chest, maybe its Tris.

I hurry over to the door, unlocking it. When I throw the door open, Zeke storms past me. "Dude, what the hell is with the radio silence? I've been calling you…" He stops talking when he looks at me. "Okay, why do you look like you're going to put your fist through the wall in fifteen seconds?"

Shaking my head, I walk past him, the hope gone. I go to the kitchen and grab a beer from the fridge. Popping the tab, I take a swig and then head into the living room, plopping down on the couch.

"Tobias, what is wrong? I've never seen you this pissed before."

"I fucked everything up." Is all I can manage to say and it somehow sums up everything I needed to.

Zeke sits down next to me, leaning forward on his arms. "What did you fuck up?"

Looking at him, I think twice about telling him everything and just telling him to go home and to leave me alone. But I can't. Zeke is my best friend and I've already iced him out for too long. My relationship with Tris was probably done, so what was the harm in telling him about it?

So I explain myself to him, starting from the beginning. I only left out certain details, miniscule details – things he didn't need to know. I told him how I had started out with the tutoring sessions and how the tutoring sessions were less about studying and teaching and more about getting to know each other. Once that started happening, our relationship became less teacher/student and more…romantic.

Once I was done, I looked at him, placing my empty beer bottle on the coffee table. "I'm sorry I kept this from you, Zeke. But it was necessary."

Zeke nods, opening his third beer and looking overwhelmed. "I'm more concerned with how I didn't know that you were hooking up with one of my brother's friends."

I winced when he 'hooking up'. That couldn't accurately describe my relationship with Tris. It was far from that.

He looks at me. "Did her friends know about this? Of course not, because Uriah has a big mouth and wouldn't have kept it a secret." He laughs to himself, then turns serious. "What are you going to do?" He asks.

Shrugging, I reach for my second beer on the table. "I don't know. I can't do anything. He father threatened to have me arrested if I talked to her again."

Zeke nods his head a few times. "Yeah, but you can't just sit back doing nothing. I get how your relationship shouldn't even be a thing, but you care about her. You should fight for her. Don't let that relationship die."

She wasn't in my class. She hadn't shown up to my class for the past few days and I was worried something happened to her. Maybe her parents sent her to live with another family member for the rest of the year. The attendance sheet didn't show her name anymore.

But then she showed up to my front door. Tris, standing in the doorway of my apartment, her cheeks slightly flushed and a nervous smile plastered on her face.

And then she explained to me that her parents put her on house arrest and were basically her personal secret service every day.

Because of me. Because I was a pushy asshole. She was in trouble because I wanted her to tell her parents so that we could stop hiding. So that I could show strangers that she was mine. I was so tired of hiding out in the apartment and not being able to go on real dates or have someone by my side at the mandatory political galas who hated them as much as I do.

And she forgave me. She forgave me for almost ruining our relationship, for upsetting her family and for putting her through all the trouble. For some unknown reason, she stayed with me that night.

We talked for a good few hours and she admitted she loved me. Hearing her say those three words, it suddenly made everything seem alright. It made hiding actually seem like it was worth it.

Tris fell asleep on me. Her legs were curled in towards her chest and she had her head resting on my chest, one arm strewn over my stomach. I didn't want to wake her up, I felt too at peace. Lightly running my fingers through my hair, I stared at her sleeping form. I loved her so much, it was almost painful.

I knew that we only had about two more weeks to hide out. Afterwards, we could go on real dates to the movies or go to dinner, whatever. We could go out in public and not worry about being found out or the consequences. She was an adult and she would no longer be my student.

It could all work out. It had to work out.

The day of prom arrived so quickly, I was surprised most of the students attending were completely prepared for it. I was only reminded of the day when I showed up to my fifth period class and there were two students, neither of them was attending the prom. I told them both to head to the library and then I decided to head out early.

Tris told me that she would be getting ready all day with Christina, going out to get their nails and going for lunch.

I, on the other hand, was supposed to be chaperoning the dance tonight. I had given Tris a heads up and she just smiled at me, wrapping her tiny arms around my waist and saying how she always loved seeing me in a tux.

She promised me that she would come over later tonight after the dance. Christina was covering for her again, claiming they were going to hang out for the night after the dance. Tris didn't feel bad about it this time, because she was also covering for Christina at the same time.

I left for the dance a little early, I was supposed to be manning the front doors, checking people in as they arrived and collecting the pre-purchased tickets.

When Tris arrived, I saw her get out of the car with Christina, Will and Al. Al was wearing a matching white undershirt to match Tris's white dress. She looked breathtaking and I so wish I could tell her.

And then Al wrapped an arm around her waist as they walked inside and I felt myself stiffen and my grip on the pen in my hand tightened significantly.

Once I'm done at the table, I head inside to the dance. There's a large dance floor right below the DJ's booth, colored lights dancing around the floor, bouncing off the people dancing underneath of them. The music sounds like dance music, nothing I would know about. There weren't any words, just loud beats.

Max was standing in the corner by one of the buffet tables, so I decided to go stand by him. He nodded to me when he saw me and kept his arms crossed tightly over his chest.

"Matthews roped you into chaperoning, too?" He asked me when I stood next to him and looked out into the crowd of overly-done up students.

I nodded. "Unfortunately. She said we were low on teachers and staff." As I said that, I saw Jeanine walk to one of the tables seated with students, giving them a tight-lipped smile and most likely faking her joy. She was never joyful.

While scanning the crowd, I spotted Uriah and Will sitting next to each other, their dates sitting next to them. Tris was sitting in between Al and Christina. I saw Al lean towards her, trying to talk to her doubt, but I was still jealous – unreasonably so. And then I noticed that she was sitting closer to Christina than she was Al.

Max and I stood next to each other for a good portion of the night, and we watched as students went back and forth from the buffet to their tables and then to the dance floor, repeating the same cycle when the dessert came out.

Halfway through the dance, Jeanine walked over to where Max and I were still standing, and interrupted our conversation about next year's possible captain for the lacrosse team. "Excuse me, gentlemen." She butted in, not looking apologetic at all. Yeah, she was my boss. But that didn't mean I had to like her. She wasn't likeable. "Mr. Eaton, do you think we could have a conversation?" She glanced over at Max. "Privately."

Max nodded and then headed over to another teacher and started talking to him. "How can I help you Jeanine?" I tried to come off as polite as I could.

"You remember our conversation earlier this year about Beatrice Prior and you? About the rumors?"

I nod, turning to look at her. "The _false _rumors." I clarify.

She narrows her eyes at me, as if she doesn't believe me. "Right, well. Regardless of whether they were false or not at the time, that no longer stands." I gave her a questioning look. "I had a conversation with Beatrice's father." Shit. "And he feels as if your relationship with her might be inappropriate and he's threatening to take the problems to the media if they are not…resolved. Taking her out of your class was one way, but he still is not too pleased."

"What do you want me to do? I don't see her in my class anymore. Or at all. Whatever problems he has with the school, that's on you." I snap.

Shaking her head, she gives me a rueful smile. "It is not my problem, Tobias. You will be the one burned at the stake in the media and you don't think that the police will be ignorant to the fact that she's a minor? I don't think they care who your parents are, to be quite honest. So if you knew what was best for you – and her – you would stop any and all communication with her. Now."

And without another word, she walked off. I stared after her, confused and angry. She walked past where Tris was standing and I saw that she was staring at me, worry written all over her face.

I can't do this to her. I didn't want to lose her. We just had a few more school days to get through…

But her father. Maybe if he wasn't as powerful as Andrew Prior was and didn't have as much political pull as he did, maybe then I would be able to hold off.

But he was powerful in the political department and most citizens admired him and trusted him – he was a very trustworthy man, even I trusted him. I knew he would hide Tris from the media, because she was his daughter and he loved her and probably thought he was doing what he had to do to keep her safe. But me? I was just some nuisance who came into his life and complicated it a hell of a lot more than it needed to be.

Staring at Tris now, I thought about how telling her parents had already affected her relationship with her parents. It sucked having a shitty or nonexistent relationship with your parents.

I was the master at terrible parental relationships.

I couldn't do that to Tris. Her family was the epitome of what any family should be and I didn't want to jeopardize that for her. For some fling that may not even last through her first year of college. It wasn't worth it.

Glancing at her, I nodded at her to follow me.

The prom was being held in the high school's gym – since the senior class wasn't that big to begin with – and I headed out the back doors towards the parking lot. I waited until I could hear Tris following me and then I headed towards my car.

It was dark out, the parking lot illuminated slightly by a handful of lampposts circling the lot.

I saw a flash of white and then heard heels clicking against the cement. Turning, I saw Tris walking towards me, a smile on her lips and her white dress blowing out behind her. She looked breathtaking. My heart clenched.

"Hey." She says, wrapping her arms around my waist. "I've wanted to talk to you all night but I just…my friends wouldn't let me out of their sights." She looks up at my face, her smile evaporating. "Is everything okay?"

Shaking my head, I gently push her away. "I know this is a really bad time to do this, but it's the only time I'll be able to do it."

"Do what?" She doesn't sound upset or sad, she sounds angry.

Taking a deep breath, I place the palms of my hands against each other, almost like I'm about to plead with her or beg for something. "This…us…its bad. Your father was right in separating us. We can't work out."

Her mouth pops open in surprise and her shock turns to anger. "What?! No! No, Tobias, no! No, we're not…it is not bad!" She shakes her head quickly. "What brought this up? Why are you saying this?"

"My job is on the line here, Tris. We've both known that since the beginning. It was stupid of me to let it get this far. I love my job and I don't want to ruin my career. And the problems it can cause you just…they're not worth it."

"Tobias…please." Her voice cracked and I felt like my chest was ripped open. "I love you, you know that! I don't care about anyone's opinion. Just…please. Two weeks. Two weeks and then it won't matter." Her voice is pleading, but there's still anger there and she knew it too. If she wanted to, she could probably fight me on this and win – I would let her win.

Shutting my eyes, I just shake my head again. "I'm sorry, Tris. You know how I feel about you."

I couldn't bring myself to tell her I loved her, it would make this harder.

"Tobias…" Tris took a step towards me unconsciously, but I held my hand out, stopping her. "God, you are such a…you're a jackass! All this time you've been all for us hiding out and you told me you didn't care! Why the change of heart? You basically outed us to my parents and got pissed off when I didn't want to do that! Why can't you wait two goddamn weeks? For me?" She huffed, the anger overruling the hurt.

I take a step towards her, gently grabbing her elbow. "I really am sorry. Just…if you want to really know why, ask your father."

Leaning in, I press a kiss to her forehead and I feel her shake and I know she wants to cry, but she can't. My heart aches as I climb into the driver's seat of my truck and start it up.

Driving away, I see Tris standing in the same spot, her arms wrapped securely around herself and angry written all over her face.

* * *

**I know this kind of happened suddenly, but I felt like I needed to speed the story along so I don't have so many filler chapters and can start getting to everything after she graduates. I don't want to make a 40+ chapter fic. If I have to, I'll make a second part, but I'd rather not do that if it's not necessary.**

**But thank you all for the comments and reviews! As always, they're very much appreciated. **


	23. Chapter 23

Chapter Twenty-Three

I stare at the back of the black pickup truck as it drives away, disappearing around a corner. What…just happened? Did Tobias _break up with me_? I stare into nothing now, the truck long gone. Forcing myself to move, I slowly make my way back to the gym where the prom is being held. If I stood out here any longer, Christina would surely come looking for me and I didn't want to freak her out.

Once back inside, I find my table and sit down. Christina looks at me, her brown eyes worried. "Everything okay?" She asks and I shake my head.

Al's looking at me, confused and worried. "Hey, I'm really sorry, but I'm going to head home. I'm not feeling good."

Christina stands up when I do. "I'll take you home." I shake my head, frowning at her. "Tris…"

"No, Chris, stay here with Will. Have a good time, it's our senior prom – enjoy it." I give her a smile. "I'll be fine. I'll call you later tonight." I grab my bag and the little gift bag I received walking in and Christina gives me a tight hug. Will pats my arm and then Al is standing behind me, his suit jacket slung over his arm.

He gives me a half smile. "You're my date and I'm responsible for you – I'll take you home." I couldn't help but smile at his chivalry, but at the same time I really didn't want him to take me home. I could wait for my Mom to come pick me up. Or maybe I would get a cab. But Al doesn't seem to be having too much fun at the dance, only occasionally talking to people, so I don't put up a fight.

We get to Al's car and he holds the door open for me, allowing me to get myself and my dress into the passenger side.

Halfway to my house, after a few minutes of complete silence, Al finally speaks up. "You're not sick, are you?" He asks.

I glance over at him and then look back at the road. "No, but I wasn't having that good of a time at the dance. I didn't want to stay for the last two hours. Wouldn't have made it."

He looks at me for a quick second and then focuses back on the road, two hands on the steering wheel. "Was I a bad date?" He asks, his voice small and embarrassed. It was an odd combination for someone of Al's size and his normal, deep voice.

"No! No, Al you were a great date! It was my fault – I've been having…family problems and I let it control me tonight." I place my hand on his arm, reassuringly. "I was the terrible date."

Al shakes his hand, smiling. "I mean, you kind of were a terrible date." He laughs, joking. I laugh once and slap his arm.

We're out front of my house now and I suddenly don't want to leave. I don't want to go in and face my parents. I know if I see either of them, I'll cry. And I can't let them see me cry. I can't let them know that what they wanted happened – that Tobias was no longer in my life.

I say goodbye to Al and then head inside. Shutting the door behind me, I slowly walk towards the steps, hoping my parents aren't in the living room.

My luck is shit.

"Beatrice?" My Mom looks up from her book, her eyebrows knitted in confusion. "What are you doing home early? Did something happen?"

I laugh humorlessly, crossing my arms over my chest. "Of course something happened! It's what you and Dad both wanted to happen." I'm frustrated and angry, my hands were shaking and I could feel the burning sting of tears behind my eyes. "You guys wanted Tobias completely out of my life, so congratulations. You got your wish. He dumped me."

My Mom places her book down on the couch, a confused expression still on her face, and slowly stands up. "Beatrice, what are you talking about? What do you mean Tobias dumped you?"

I squint my eyes at her, placing my hands on my hips. "You and Dad threatened to have him fired and to have the cops called on him if he didn't stay away from me!"

"I didn't do any of that, Beatrice. Sure, I didn't approve of the two of you. But I would never threaten to call the cops on him. Lord knows he's probably had to do that enough for his own father."

Ignoring the last comment, I shake my head. "Then it was Dad. He still forced Tobias to break up with me."

Just then my Dad comes down the steps, most likely coming out of his study. My mother speaks up before I can, her voice threatening. "Andrew, did you threaten Tobias Eaton?"

My dad's taken aback by the sudden accusation. He looks at my Mom and then to me and then back to my Mom. I can see the politician in him trying to come up with a quick and clear lie – it's what his entire job is focused on. "Of course I didn't." He glances over at me, trying to come off as innocent. "Obviously this is just another one of his ways of trying to control you."

"Control me?" I sneer. "Tobias would never control me. He never lied to me. Unlike you!"

"Beatrice!" My Mom's voice issues a warning. "Andrew, did you or did you not threaten to have him arrested?"

Sighing and looking defeated, he nods. "I did." My mom's look of disgust causes him to defend himself. "But it was for her protection! I did it for her future and for her happiness!"

"Her happiness?" She grunted. "She was happy with him, Andrew! This was more for your campaign than her happiness!"

I'm more shocked by the fact that my mom was defending my relationship with Tobias than by the fact that she was yelling at my Dad. They never argued and, while it made me uneasy, I wasn't too worried about it damaging their marriage. They loved each other too much. But my Mom was standing up for me to my Dad. She was agreeing that I was happier with him than without.

"Natalie, you can't really believe that their relationship was appropriate!" Disbelief all over his face.

She crosses her arms over her chest and looks at me, her eyes soft. "Not at first, I didn't. I thought it was dangerous and completely inappropriate. But she was so happy this past year while she was with him. And these last few weeks she's been miserable." She looks to my dad, her eyes still soft. "Andrew, I know you don't like the idea of them. But think about Beatrice. She's an adult, she knows the difference between right and wrong. Think about her happiness. Trust her." Her voice is pleading a little. "You don't have to like it, but whether or not you do, she's going to be gone in a few weeks and you know for a fact that as soon as that happened, they would be together again." She was speaking to him like I wasn't in the room. Like I wasn't less than five feet away from them.

My dad shakes his head, dragging his hands down his face. He looks over at me. "I'm not sorry for separating you two," I glare at him. "but I am sorry about upsetting you."

Without saying anything to him, I head upstairs, slamming my door behind me. Reaching behind me, I unzip my dress and kick it into the corner of my room.

After changing into a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt, I climb into bed and pull my blankets up over my head. I can hear my parents talking downstairs, but I can't hear exactly what they're saying. Probably talking more about me. Great.

After a while, it gets quiet and I assume they've both gone to bed. Then I hear my bedroom door open and a few seconds later, the bed dips down where someone sits. Small, thin fingers brush through my hair lightly and I know it's my mother. She always used to comb my hair whenever I was upset as a child. "I really am sorry about what your father did, Beatrice." She says softly. "I didn't expect him to go that far." I stay silent while she talks. "And as much as I don't…approve of your relationship, I really do want you to be happy. You deserve to be happy, Beatrice."

"Why couldn't you just try me when we told you? Why did you have to throw him out?" I ask, most of the question muffled by the pillow.

She's quiet for a few moments, thinking. "I was…taken by surprise. I was shocked that you had gotten yourself involved in a relationship like that. You've always been an intelligent young lady and I just never thought that this kind of thing would ever happen. That you would do something so…rebellious."

I scoff, rolling my eyes at the wall. "It wasn't rebellious. Tobias and I just…clicked. He understood me." Cliché, but it was true. "I wasn't dating him to piss you and Dad off. I never wanted to piss you guys off or cause any trouble. For once, I was doing something for me."

She didn't say anything else and I felt the bed shift when she got up. After she left, she shut the door behind her and I fell asleep.

I tried to call Tobias the next day, but he ignored the call and it went to voicemail. I didn't want to be the clingy ex who kept calling, but I had to talk to him. It wasn't fair of him to end things the way he did and not pick up one of my calls. It was rude and frankly, extremely immature. I deserved to have a conversation with him – one where I actually got to talk.

Finals week came quicker than I expected and all the seniors were starting graduation in the eye. I had been so ready for graduation and so excited to finally leave high school behind me. But now I couldn't bring myself to be happy. I felt like there was a constant black cloud following me around all day, threatening to start pouring rain on me. I went through finals week without seeing Tobias once. Christina never mentioned him, even though I know she had to have seen him since he was giving them their government final.

I never really explained everything that happened between Tobias and me that night. Christina just knew that we weren't talking and that it may or may not be because of my dad.

After my last final, my teacher instructed all the seniors to meet at the school on Monday morning to practice for graduation while the underclassmen had their finals. She dismissed us and then I met up with Christina in the parking lot. My parents had given me my car back, but I still had driven to school with Christina because we were heading to lunch with some friends.

We met up with Marlene, Lynn and Uriah at a small diner a few minutes from the school. Will and Al had to clean out their gym lockers and then were heading to the gym so they never met up with us for lunch.

We said our goodbyes to everyone after lunch and then Christina and I headed to her house. "So has Eaton called you at all yet?" She didn't like calling Tobias by his first name so she just used his last name, which is how everyone acknowledged him at school.

I shake my head, plopping down in the round papasan chair in the corner of her room and pulling a decorative pillow into my lap. "No. I've stopped calling him. He clearly doesn't want to talk to me so…I'm done. I'm not going to worry about it."

She shakes her head, crossing her legs pretzel style in the middle of her bed. "That's ridiculous. I can't believe he just broke up with you. On prom night!"

"Can we talk about something else? I don't want to talk about this."

Nodding, the anger in her face turns to excitement. "Okay, let's talk about senior week. We're using Uriah's parents' house at Cedar Lake and it's big enough for everyone to fit in. It's like a two-hour drive, but we'll have to take two cars since not everyone can fit in one car. Also, we need to figure out what to do for food and alcohol."

She prattled on and on about everything that was going to happen during senior week. She talked about who was coming, who had bailed and who was still deciding.

I let her try and distract me until it was time for me to go home. I promised to text her as soon as I got home.

At home, my attitude towards my parents was a little better than what it had been prom night. I still wasn't very happy with them, but I made an effort to put on a good show and be friendly and be a good daughter. I still loved them and I still wanted to make them proud, but there was still a part of me that was pissed that my dad was the reason behind my failed relationship.

Caleb had driven down yesterday after he was done work so that he could be home for my graduation. Susan had stayed behind; she was apparently close to a promotion so she didn't want to miss work. I promised her she wasn't going to miss anything special. He wasn't totally up-to-date on what had gone down while he was away, but he knew that my dad and I weren't too communicative towards each other at the moment and that it had to do with a guy. That was as much as I was willing to tell him.

After I got home from Christina's, Caleb and I headed out so that I could show him my apartment. Christina and I were moving in at the beginning of August, so that we had time to go grocery shopping and finish getting anything else that we needed for the apartment. We had already gone furniture shopping at IKEA a few days after prom, after my resentment towards my mom had gone away. We had gotten our beds, couches and a few other things that weren't provided in the apartment.

"This is a great view, Beatrice." Caleb said, staring out the large bay window in the living room. I smiled, nodding. The window as my favorite part of the apartment. "I wish Mom and Dad had done this for me." He says, his tone slightly joking.

I rolled my eyes, sitting down on the tan sofa. "Maybe they would have if you hadn't gone across the country to UCLA."

He sits down on the other end of the sofa, leaning back against the armrest. "So, this guy…"

I groan, shaking my head. "Caleb, I really don't want to talk about this! Especially with you!" Caleb just shakes his head and gives me a condescending look.

"No, I want to talk about this. You're not talking to Dad, he's not talking to you – well, he's trying but failing. Terribly. What did he do to piss you off so much?"

I shake my head, not wanting to talk about it. "He just…pulled a stupid stunt and it ruined a good relationship."

"I gathered that from the last five times you told me that. But what did he actually do? What happened and who was this guy that apparently pissed Dad off so much?"

Looking up at him, I imagined that for a second, just a second, that he was just doing this for our dad. That he was trying to get answers out of me to report back to my dad. It was something Caleb's done before as a child. Although back then it was just to see if I had been stealing cookies and candy from the cupboard and then lie about it, but still. I suddenly hated myself for thinking that way. Caleb was an adult and would never do that. "His name's Tobias Eaton and he's…he _was_ my teacher."

Caleb looked just as surprised as my mother had when we told her. "Wait…Tobias _Eaton_? The Tobias whose dad was kicked off the council for domestic abuse?" I nod and Caleb nods his head a few times. "Wow. Wait…what do you mean he was your teacher?"

"Dad had me pulled from his class and had threatened to call the cops on him if he even looked at me."

The surprised expression disappeared and it was replaced with an impressed one. "So not only did you date someone way older than you, but it was one of your teachers." He laughed. "Damn. I didn't think you would be the rebellious one."

I rolled my eyes. "I wasn't being rebellious. I was acting on my feelings."

"And they were rebellious feelings." He smirks and I shove his arm. "Come on, we should probably head home. Mom's going to be starting dinner soon." He stands up and looks at me. "For what it's worth, if he really loved you, he would have put up a fight for you."


	24. Chapter 24

Chapter Twenty-Four

I stopped calling Tobias. I wasn't going to be that girl that couldn't deal with the break-up so she continuously stalked her ex. If he wanted to talk to me or to make up, he would approach me. He wouldn't make me approach him.

The only problem was graduation. All the teachers from the high school showed up to graduation – it was kind of mandatory – so he would be there. I didn't know what to expect or how I would handle seeing him again.

Caleb joked around, saying that he would beat Tobias up for me. I laughed at that, just imagining tall and skinny Caleb going after Tobias, who was very built.

Graduation practice was the Monday following finals and it was boring. We had to line up in the gym according to how we would be lined up for graduation in the same gym. After that, we went through the motions of walking up on stage, accepting our diplomas and then walking off stage. It didn't take too long, since our senior class was relatively small, but it was still boring.

That Thursday was graduation and we were told to be at the high school by noon even though the ceremony didn't start until one-thirty.

I spent that hour and a half in the band room with half the senior class. We all talked to each other, talked about summer plans and senior week plans. After talking, we would go around and take pictures with people. I got a big group picture with Will, Al, Uriah, Christina, Marlene and Lynn. The whole of us were going to Cedar Lake together that Saturday and we were all excited and couldn't stop talking about it.

Even though I was so excited to hear my name called in less than an hour, part of my mind was still preoccupied with thoughts of Tobias. _Would he be wearing a suit? Or would he be in nice dress pants and a button down? What if he wore the red tie that I liked? _

Christina noticed and pulled me down the hall into the bathroom. She kicked open the two stall doors, making sure it was empty and then locked the door. "Alright, I know who you're thinking about and it needs to stop. Right now. At least for the rest of the day." She placed her hands on her hips. "After graduation and dinner tonight, you can go back to moping about him whenever and however you like. But right now, we are about to graduate high school. We're going to be done with all the petty drama, we'll be away from all the immature fuckboys in this school. We're going to college and we're going to be adults. Be happy!"

"You're right. I'm sorry for moping." I apologize. She smiles and tugs on my dress straps, fixing them. "By the way, I love your dress." She winks and then unlocks the door, pulling me after her.

We still have about twenty minutes left until we're supposed to line up and head to the gym so I decide to call my parents. I see that there's a text from my mom letting me know that they're on their way and I decide against calling them. They're all probably sitting down already. I'll see them when I walk across the stage.

When the time comes to line up Christina comes and gives me a tight hug and lines up in her spot. I'm a few lines behind her and I'm in front of Marlene. She gives me a tight squeeze, too and then we're heading into the gym.

My leg jiggles while I'm sitting down, listening to the Valedictorian speak, then Jeanine Matthews speaks and I can't help but glare at her. She would have been the one to approve of my being moved from Tobias's class. And I've always hated her – especially when she had accused me of having a relationship with Tobias earlier in the year. She had been right, but she had talked bad about my family. It had pissed me off.

Finally, what seems like hours later, my row is finally able to head up stage to get our diplomas. While I'm waiting in line behind everyone, I scan the crowd trying to find my family. I search for Caleb, knowing I would be able to see him over everybody's heads because of his height.

I can't find them and keep scanning the crowd, row by row, searching for them. Looking for my mother's proud expression and my father would possibly have a proud look on his face. I know Caleb would be smiling at me. But I can't find them. I don't even see Tobias in the crowd. Maybe he faked being sick to avoid me. Thankfully, I'm too preoccupied by searching for my family I don't have enough room in my head to think about him at the moment.

"Beatrice Prior." I didn't even realize my name was being called until Marlene poked my spine, causing me to stop searching the crowd. She gave me a look and then made my way onto stage. I gave a tight lipped smile to Jeanine and then made my way to collect my diploma from…. Tobias.

Fucking fantastic.

He extends his hand and my diploma out and I take the diploma and shake his hand. "Congrats Ms. Prior." I try to smile at him, but I can't. He gives me a concerned look and then I'm walking away and I can see Jeanine shooting him a glare. Great.

After everyone had their diplomas, we were told to move our tassels and then we were congratulated on being the official class of 2015. Everyone's caps flew into the air, a mixture of black and grey (honestly, we had the most mundane and boring school colors). I didn't have enough energy behind my throw, so I caught my hat before most of the other hats started to fall.

Christina found me first, shouting into my ear that we were high school graduates. But I couldn't hear her. Everything was quiet as I searching frantically for my parents and Caleb. They would have found me as soon as everyone started throwing their hats.

I didn't even realize Christina was speaking to me until her face came into focus and I saw her frowning. She shouldn't be frowning. "Tris, what's wrong?"

"My family…I can't find them!" I shout above the cheers and families laughing. "They aren't here!"

Christina's family comes over and her Mom gives her a tight hug, lifting her off the ground a little. And then she turns to me a gives me a kiss on the cheek. I force a small smile; it probably came out more like a grimace than a smile.

"I'm going to go call my mom." I shouted at Christina and she looked like she was going to try to follow me, but I shook my head and nodded towards her family. "Stay." I mouthed.

I hurried through the crowd of new graduates and families and found my way back into the school and found an empty hallway. I took my phone out and dialed my mom's number. Her phone went straight to voicemail. The same for my Dad's phone. Caleb's rang a few times and then went to voicemail. I didn't have any text messages or voice mails. Nothing. Where were they?

"Tris?" God, that was the last voice I wanted to hear. "Is everything okay? Why aren't you with your family?" Tobias was standing behind me, the earlier concerned expression still on his face.

Shaking my head, I ignore his question. "Why do you care? You haven't wanted to talk to me for the past three weeks. Why now?"

"It's complicated."

"The hell it is!" I shout at him. I didn't mean to shout, but it was a combination of my pent up anger of his avoidance the last few weeks and the worry and fear for my family.

"Tris…" Tobias started.

A voice interrupts him and we both turn to see who was speaking. "I knew I was right about you two." Peter smirks and I feel like everything over the past year opens up and just starts pouring out like a broken dam. I was so sick of him and his attitude. I was pissed at him for hurting friends of mine. For putting Al in a terrible position. For almost getting me and Tobias in trouble with Jeanine earlier this year. I was even more pissed at him getting to come back to school after being arrested for selling drugs and then being allowed to graduate. Add that to my current state and I felt like a living, ticking time bomb.

Sidestepping Tobias, I stride over to where Peter's standing, my wedges having no effect on my swiftness. Peter is still wearing his smirk and I see a red tint in my vision. My hand curls into a fist. Then, pulling my hand backwards, I let it snap forward to connect with his nose.

I hear a satisfying crunch and then blood starts to pour out onto the front of his shirt. "Tris!" Tobias shouts at the same time that Peter says, "Shit!"

Tobias's hands grip my forearms and he's pulling me away from Peter and down another hallway. "What the hell was that, Tris?" He doesn't look pissed or angry – if anything, he looks kind of impressed.

I shrug, rubbing my knuckles. They were red, but I didn't hurt myself. That was a true success. "I don't know. I need to leave." I turn to leave, but Tobias grabs my arm.

"Tris, I really want to talk to you. Just…come over later? Please?"

I don't promise him, I just look at him for a few moments and then nod once. "Fine." And then I head away from him and into the bathroom. I turn on the sink, running my red knuckles under the cold water. It wouldn't do anything, but it helped me feel better.

My phone started to ring and I shut the sink off, grabbing my phone. The number's not in my contacts. "Hello?"

"Hello, this is Dr. Jack Kang. Am I speaking to Beatrice Prior?"

"Yes, it is. Can I ask why you are calling?"

His voice doesn't sound too happy and my heart drops to the bottom of my stomach. "I'm afraid that we have your parents and brother in our E.R. right now. They just came in a few minutes ago. They were in a car accident."

I stop breathing and my legs collapse to the cold tiled floor. I can barely manage to get any words out. "O…Okay." I hang up and try to get my frozen limbs to move. I can't. But I need to move and get to the hospital. Staring at my phone, I manage to move my frozen fingers and send a text to Christina. It says "help" and "bathroom".

Less than three minutes later, Christina bursts into the bathroom, her face creased with worry and fear when she sees me kneeling on the floor. "Tris, what's wrong?"

"My parents…Caleb. They're…they're in the hospital." I should be crying right now. Why wasn't I crying? Was my body so in shock it couldn't even cry right now?

She pulls me up onto my feet and grabs my hand tightly. "Shit, alright. Let's go, I'll drive."

"No, you have to go see your family." She shakes her head at my protests, dragging me out of the bathroom and to the parking lot. We're hitting people as we move but no one really seems to care.

"Absolutely not. You need to go see your family and I won't let you drive yourself. You'll get into an accident." She helps me into the passenger side of her car and then she's squealing out of the parking lot, speeding away from the school.

Once we got to the hospital, Christina parked in the emergency room parking lot and I all but sprinted into the E.R. I ran up to the desk and tapped on it, getting the nurse's attention. "I'm looking for Dr. Jack Kang. He called me about my family…"

"Tris…" Christina touches my arm and I turn around to see my brother laying on a gurney. He has a few cuts and bruises and his left arm is in a sling, but he's awake and he's talking to Susan. He looks up in my direction and I run over to him, throwing my arms around his neck and hear him groan.

"Sorry! Sorry!" My earlier shock is gone and I'm crying relieved tears. "Caleb, I'm so glad that you're okay."

He nods, squeezing Susan's hand with his good hand. "Yeah…but Mom and Dad."

When he says that, he looks over towards one of the trauma rooms and I see a bunch of nurses and doctors working over someone. I hurry to the window and see that it's my dad. His body is convulsing on the table and I see someone pushing a tube down his throat. Without thinking, I push through the door to the room, ignoring the nurses and doctors that were telling me to leave. I stared at his body, my eyes wide with shock, as the beeping on the monitor increased and people were yelling different things to different people. "He's coding!" and "Push one of epi now!" All the voices were a jumbled mess in my ears. I felt the room tilt and then a nurse was pushing me out as they wheeled his gurney away. Another pair of arms grabbed mine and pulled me back to where Caleb was. I sat down on the end of his bed and watched as a dark haired man walked over to us. He had dark, slanted eyes and an aura of superiority.

"I'm Doctor Jack Kang." He glanced down at me. "You must be Beatrice." I can only manage to nod my head once. "Your mother is in surgery now and your father is heading into surgery. We don't know how long it'll take, but we're going to do our best."

Caleb thanked him and then he left.

We all sat with Caleb while the nurses tended to him. They cleaned out his cuts, stitched them up and then dressed the wounds. I watched them, slightly fascinated by the calm they were able to maintain.

After a bit, Christina dragged me down to the cafeteria to get some food. Susan stayed by Caleb's side, refusing to leave even though he assured her he was perfectly fine.

I had no appetite so I just grabbed a coffee. I looked at my phone and was shocked to realize it was almost nine-thirty at night. Have we really been here since three? I also realized that I had a message from Tobias. Shit, I was supposed to go to his apartment.

"Chris, I have to go call Tobias. I promised him we would talk tonight. I can't ditch him…" She waved her hand at me, and I headed to a quiet corner. He didn't pick up and so I called him again. Voicemail. "Tobias, it's me. I get how you're pissed at me for ditching you. But listen…I'm at the hospital right now. My parents and Caleb got into a car accident." My throat tightened up and I sniffled, trying not to cry. My voice shook when I spoke again. "I just…I need you here, Tobias. Please. For me."

I didn't know what else to say, so I hung up and wiped my eyes in case any tears escaped. After meeting back up with Christina, we headed back to Caleb.

When we got back to the E.R., there were nurses surrounding Caleb and Susan was shaking and crying. She saw me and I ran over to her, dropping my coffee on the tiled floor. "Beatrice! Oh my God, I don't know what happened! One second he was fine, talking about us taking a vacation somewhere and then the next…he just…I didn't…" She was hysterical.

I watched as the nurses wheeled him out into the hallway, just as they did with my dad. This could not be happening. No.

A nurse walked up to the three of us, gesturing towards a door. "I'm sorry, but you three are going to have to wait in the waiting room while he's in surgery."

I didn't want to go to the waiting room. I didn't want to have to wait for any of them to get out of surgery. I wanted them out. I wanted them to be fine. But the nurse was insistent and ushered us to the waiting room. There were only two other people in the waiting room, plus a nurse at the desk.

Christina and I sat down while Susan paced the length of the room. I was going to tell Susan to sit down, but I knew she wouldn't. She would keep pacing until we got information on Caleb.

Sometime around eleven I ended up falling asleep, leaning my head on Christina's shoulder. The next time I woke up, it was because Christina was shaking me. "Tris, it's your mom."

I looked up to see Susan's face buried in her hands and her shoulders shaking. The doctor was patting her shoulder. No. No. The doctor looks in my direction and then walks over. "Miss Prior…."

"No." My voice is still heavy with sleep. "No, don't." I shake my head. "Don't say anything."

The doctor frowned, looking sorry for me. "I'm so sorry. We did everything we could. The damage was too much and she had swelling to her brain. It wouldn't stop." I grabbed Christina's hand, squeezing it as tight as I could.

"What about my Dad?" I choked out. "Is he out of surgery? And Caleb?"

The doctor nodded. "Your father is out. But he's unresponsive. He's…brain dead."

"What does that mean?" Susan asks, sitting down next to me.

"It means that he's alive but his brain is unresponsive. His organs are still working, but only because he's hooked up to a breathing machine. Once the machine is unplugged…it's his only form of life support right now."

Christina cussed under her breath and squeezed my hand. "Caleb?"

The doctor sighs. "He had a brain bleed. We didn't catch it on any scans, which is common with some brain bleeds. We managed to stop the bleeding and he's asleep right now. We don't know how long he'll be asleep but we have to let his body heal. We can't wake him up or it might cause significant damage."

Was it possible to hear one good thing? Just…something good?

This had to be a nightmare. It was still the night before graduation. I was just having a really, really bad stress dream.

I didn't realize the doctor was still talking to me until I heard Susan call my name. "What?"

"You're the only one who decides what happens with your father. We can't keep him on the life support too long, it won't benefit him. If you want to wait a few days, call family?" He looks between me and Susan.

Shaking my head, I look at him and feel exhausted. "No. There's no other family." But that didn't mean I wanted to unplug him right now. I couldn't.

He let us know that we could go and see Caleb. I let Susan go first while I stayed back in the waiting room with Christina. When I sit back down, I slump sideways, leaning my head on Christina's shoulder. "Please tell me I'm having a nightmare…" I mumble to Christina.

She rubs my head soothingly. "I'm so sorry, Tris." She grabs my hand tightly. "Just…sleep. I'll wake you when Susan comes back."

I can't sleep and so around midnight, Susan comes back to the waiting room and says she's going to head home for a few hours to sleep. I promise her I'll her if there's any change with Caleb and the I give her a tight hug.

Once she's gone, I head into Caleb's room in the ICU. I sit on the chair next to his bed and gingerly take his good hand in mine. Christina had stayed out in the waiting room, letting me have alone time with my brother.

"Hey, Caleb." I start, feeling the tears already starting. "So…Dad's out of surgery. The doctor said that he's pretty much brain dead and his organs are only living because of the breathing machine they have him on." I sniffle. "He's a human vegetable." Shaking my head, I use my free hand to wipe away my tears. "And mom's…. mom's gone. She didn't make it through her surgery. And on top of that, I'm in charge of telling the doctors when to unplug dad. Everything's falling to pieces and I…I feel like I can't breathe. I feel like there's a pile of bricks on my chest and Caleb – you need to wake up. I need you to live. I need you to wake up. I can't be alone. I can't do it, Caleb. Susan needs you, too. You promised her a wedding and you better stick to your promise. Mom and Dad would be pissed if you didn't."


	25. Chapter 25

Chapter Twenty-Five

I'm woken up by a nurse gently shaking my shoulder. He looks apologetic when I glare at him and he quickly says, "I'm sorry for waking you, but there's media outside of the hospital…"

I groan, sitting up. My back feels completely stiff and my neck kills. I fell asleep on the small space next to Caleb's arm, holding his hand. "Get them out of here, please." I knew that the news of my parents' car accident would get out soon, but I didn't think it would be less than twenty-four hours soon. The last thing I wanted to do was to talk to any media about it.

He nods and then tells me that I need to leave and wait for visiting hours. I don't argue – I'm hungry and haven't seen Christina since before I passed out.

She's still in the waiting room and she's leaning against the wall, asleep. I kick her foot, causing her to jump and wake up. She looks around, disoriented. "What the hell, Tris?" She wipes the dried drool away from her mouth and then sighs. "Anything change with Caleb?"

"No and the nurse kicked me out. He said I can come back to see him during visiting hours. I'm just going to go get breakfast."

She stands up, yawning. "I'll come with you." I shake my head, grabbing her wrist.

Shaking my head, I give her a small and tired smile. "Chris, you're supposed to be leaving for Cedar Lake later this afternoon. Go get ready."

Christina narrows her eyes at me, as if I insulted her. "I'm not going, Tris. I'm staying here with you. You need me. Besides, I already told everyone else to go on. They stopped by late last night and wanted to talk to you. The nurse wouldn't let them and they promised me that they would stay here and skip senior week. But then I got pissed and told them about the amount of money we've already spent for the house and boat rental. They're going and I'm staying."

Arguing with Christina was like arguing with a brick wall – it wouldn't get you anywhere.

As we're sitting in the cafeteria eating a muffin and drinking some coffee, I look at Christina and realize she keeps looking at me when she doesn't think I'm watching. She's looking at me like she's waiting for something. Like she's waiting for me to break down and go completely mental.

Clearing my throat, she looks up at me. "Have you by any chance seen Tobias?"

She shakes her head. "No, but I was out for a good…. six or seven hours from the time you went to Caleb's room until Will and the others showed up."

I didn't know whether I expected him to show up or not. He had wanted to talk, didn't he? If he still wanted to be with me, he would have shown up. He would have come running when he got my voicemail…

Susan was sitting next to Caleb when I got back to the room and, giving me a sad smile, she nods to a bag sitting in the corner of the room. "I stopped by your parents' house and grabbed you some new clothes." She glances at my outfit and then focuses back on Caleb. "I didn't think you would want to stay in your dress."

"Thank you." I slip into the bathroom to change, bunching the dress up and stuffing it in the bag, wanting to completely forget about it.

Susan had brought me a pair of skinny jeans and a plain white t-shirt. I was extremely thankful, happy to be out of my graduation dress. Once I was back in Caleb's room, I sat on the other side of him, placing my hand on top of his arm.

"I told him he has to wake up because he promised you a big wedding and our parents would be angry if he went back on that promise." I say, my voice barely audible. Susan chuckles and then sniffs. "I'll also kick his ass if he goes back on that promise." I add on.

Dr. Kang comes into the room then and looks up from his clipboard. "Ah, Miss Prior. I'm actually glad that you're here." He looks over at Susan and then back to me. "Caleb's nurse took some of his vitals this morning and everything is looking good, his vitals are going up. And from the looks of it, he should be awake in a few hours."

Susan lets out a sound of relief and then slumps forward, kissing the top of Caleb's hand, ignoring the IVs.

Dr. Kang's hopeful expression turns into one of despair. "There's also the matter of your father, of course. He only has a few more days on the life support before his entire body shuts down. When do you want to…?"

"I want to wait for my brother to wake up. He deserves to say his goodbyes." He gives me a nod and then ducks out of the room, shutting the clear sliding door behind him.

The doctor's news gave both Susan and I hope and neither of us wanted to leave. Even when we both got hungry, Christina gladly ran down to the cafeteria and grabbed us all lunch and then sat in the room with us.

After a bit, Christina left to go call Will and see what was going on at the senior week house.

When she left, Susan and I sat in silence, staring at Caleb and waiting for him to show signs of waking up. Susan held his good hand tightly, whispering things into their closed hands.

Suddenly, I notice Caleb's arm twitch. It was a small movement, but it was movement. Susan noticed too and she dropped his hand, looking up at me in shock.

We both held our breath, waiting for another sign of movement. His good hand flexes and then his eyes open. Susan quickly hits the button for the nurse and a nurse appears in the doorway and Susan yells, "He's waking up! We need Dr. Kang!"

Dr. Kang made his way into the room quickly and nurses pushed Susan and I aside while they took the jump out of his throat to let him breathe properly and then they took his vitals and asked him some questions.

"Do you know your name?" Dr. Kang asks while shining a light into his eyes.

Caleb blinks against the light. "Caleb Prior." His voice is hoarse and Susan grabs my arm tightly.

Dr. Kang nods, holding his finger in front of Caleb's eyes. "And do you know where you are?"

"In the hospital because some jackass hit our car…" I can't help but laugh. His attitude was still there, even after waking up after a major brain surgery. He finally looked up to where Susan and I were standing. "Are you two okay?"

We both nod and he visibly relaxes. The doctor finishes up and then lets us know that Caleb will have to stay another three days just to make sure he's completely better and he doesn't have a seizure or relapse. Once he left, Susan hurried to Caleb's side and started to pepper kisses all over his face. "Don't ever scare me like that again." She tells him, and he smiles at her. Then he looks at me. "Where are Mom and Dad?"

Susan and I glanced at each other nervously and then I shook my head. "Dad is…he's in another room." I look at him, knowing my face was probably giving everything away. "Waiting for you."

The doctors finish up and Caleb is moved into a normal room, finally out of the ICU. He's not allowed to be up and walking around, so after he managers to keep some food down, a nurse helps him into a wheelchair and we head to our father's room.

"Oh my God." Caleb gasps when he sees our father. "Is he going to be okay?" He asks me, still looking at dad.

I shake my head, frowning. "No. The doctor said he's brain dead and the only thing keeping him alive is the life support, but we can't keep him on it forever. He told me it's my decision of when to unplug him, but I didn't think it would be fair to you to unplug him before you got to see him one last time."

Caleb nods. "Thank you." He says, his voice low. He wheels himself over to the bedside and then touches dad's hand. "Goddammit, why did this have to happen?"

Dr. Kang is standing behind me and I feel slightly uncomfortable by his hovering. He has to know that as soon as Caleb's done, I'm going to tell him to unplug him.

Turning to face me, Caleb has tears falling down his cheeks. "I'm done…" The nurse wheels him out and I turn to Dr. Kang. He gives me a small nod and then I take a seat next to Dad, taking his hand in mine. "I'm so sorry Dad, about everything. I'm sorry you had to deal with my…problem. I'm sorry I was ever angry with you. You were just protecting me. I'm sorry I never got to tell you that I love you one last time."

Dr. Kang begins to speak, telling me what was going to happen once he shut off the monitor. He explained how his heart would completely stop and then his organs would slowly begin to shut down, completely shutting off after about two hours.

I tried to tune him out and just stared at my father's face, peaceful, even with the cuts and bruises on his face from the accident.

Once the doctor is done, he ushers me out of the room and Christina is waiting for me in the hallway. I go straight into her arms, burying my face in her shoulder, shaking uncontrollably with sobs.

We waited to have the funeral for my parents until Caleb was out of the hospital and once he was better.

It was a small funeral, put together by Susan and Caleb. I didn't want to have a say in it. Why would I? I was racked with guilt, knowing that they both died without me telling them that I loved them one last time. My father – thinking I was still angry with him. All of my anger disappeared as soon as I got the call from the doctor telling me he was in an accident.

Besides, he was right about Tobias. He didn't really love me. He didn't even show up to the hospital after I had called him, begging him to be with me, be at the hospital for me. He never showed up and he never called.

I didn't bother calling him for the funeral, everyone knew when it was – the media was all over Caleb and I after the news broke of my parents' accident. We didn't want them at the funeral, but it was inevitable. But that didn't stop Caleb from hiring some police officers to make sure that they stayed away from the funeral home and far away once we got to the cemetery.

Christina was by my side through the whole thing, sitting next to me at the viewing and then standing beside me at the cemetery, holding my hand tightly.

She had been by my side since that day that I felt like if she left, I would break down. She was one of the last chords holding me on Earth. If she disappeared or left, I would have a thin chord, barely holding me here.

Caleb had tried talking me into taking a semester of college off, starting in the spring semester instead of the fall semester. I didn't want that. It would just mean more time sitting around, thinking about everything. I needed to go to class and think about something else for a while. It would keep me pretty preoccupied.

"It's not healthy to bottle up all your emotions…" Caleb warned me, but I just shook it off.

Ignoring my emotions was a hell of a lot better than letting them consume me all at once. I didn't need that. Not right now.

* * *

**I know this was short, but I hadn't planned on making this chapter extremely long. It was kind of just a fluff chapter to push the story along. Also, I'm super happy with the reviews from the previous chapter. I was hoping that nobody had expected where I was going. **


	26. Chapter 26

Chapter Twenty-Six

Tobias POV

*5 months later*

"It's been more a little more than five months since the terrible car accident that killed mayor candidate, Andrew Prior, and his wife. Some want to believe that the car accident was a freak accident while others want to believe it was someone who didn't approve of Prior's pulling ahead in the race. However, foul play has been ruled out as the driver was found to be under the influence. But today councilmember Edgar steps forward to take role of acting Mayor. He was Prior's opponent and had made a public statement after the car accident, talking about how terrible he felt about his passing and how he empathized with his children…"

I slammed my finger down on the power button on the remote. I didn't need to hear the anchorwoman saying anything and I didn't need to hear the new mayor saying how much he regrets losing such a wonderful human being.

I didn't need to be reminded of what I left Tris to deal with.

She called me multiple times that night and I let her calls go to voicemail, thinking that she had just decided to ditch me.

And then I listened to her voicemail, her voice cracking like she was about to cry as she explained what happened to her parents and to Caleb. The last voicemail was a few hours old and it was close to midnight, but I didn't even think twice before I was heading to the parking garage and heading to the hospital.

When I got there, Christina was asleep in the waiting room and I talked to a nurse to figure out where the Priors were. The nurse told me Caleb Prior was in the ICU and gave me the room number. At the room, Tris was sitting next to Caleb's bed, holding his hand, her head resting on the small space next to his leg. She was asleep.

Something in my head was telling me to wake her up and let her know that I was there for her. Let her cry, if she needed to. But another voice, this one ten times louder, was telling me to get out of there. To let her grieve in peace. I knew how her parents felt about me and I didn't need her to worry about their reactions while worrying about their wellbeing – it wasn't fair to her.

But that doesn't excuse my absence the last few months. Don't get me wrong – I've tried to reach out to her, but she doesn't want to see or hear from me.

I had spent a majority of the summer pent up in my apartment, drinking and ignoring Zeke's phone calls and anyone else who tried to call me, really.

Eventually Zeke got pissed off and came over, storming into my apartment. "Tobias, what the hell?" He was angry, but then he must have seen how I looked. "Jesus, dude. What the hell happened?" I told him everything about what happened with Tris's family and how I just left the hospital without talking to her. "Don't keep calling her, Tobias! Of course she isn't going to pick up! Man up and go to her!" He still looks angry at me, but not as angry as he did earlier. "But please, shower and shave first."

Okay, so I didn't go and talk to her after that, but I did clean myself up.

School started again in early September and I managed to pull myself together to be presentable during the school day. During the day my mind was focused on school work, but once I got home all the guilt building up throughout the day overflowed and it took a good amount of strength not to fall into the same black hole I did over the summer.

The newswoman disappeared off screen and it changed to a young, African American male talking about the upcoming weather for the Thanksgiving weekend.

I shut the TV off and stared at my phone. I could easily call Zeke and get him to have Uriah give up where Tris is staying. I needed to talk to her and I knew that she would never pick up her phone if she saw my name or number.

Grabbing my phone, I dial Zeke's number. "Hey, I need a favor…"

"What kind of favor?" He asks and then I tell him.

Twenty minutes later, I'm standing in front of 15C feeling like a nervous teenage boy. This is stupid. Why am I so nervous?

_Maybe she'll throw a book at you or yell at you. Or maybe she'll punch you in the face. She messed Peter's nose up pretty good._

I couldn't help but smile to myself as I recalled her graduation day, when she punched Peter Hayes straight in the face, breaking his nose. It was impressive.

Taking a deep breath, I knock three times on the door and it opens, revealing Christina. She looks surprised for a split second and then her surprise turns to annoyance. "What do you want?"

"Is Tris home?" I ask.

She shakes her head, leaning against the door. "No, she's still in class. But I'll tell her you stopped by." She goes to shut the door but I quickly place my foot in the small space, stopping the door from shutting.

"Look, Christina, I know Tris is angry with me and I get why you're angry with me. But please, just let me explain." I beg.

Christina narrows her eyes and keeps her hand on the doorknob. "Why should I let you explain now? You've had months to apologize and confront her, but you choose now?"

"Christina…" I plead. I don't know what makes her change her mind, but she's letting me into the apartment and shutting the door behind us.

"Tris is going to kill me for letting you in here. How did you even find out where we lived?" She pads over to the living room, sitting down on the couch and crossing her legs underneath her.

"Uriah." I admit and she rolls her eyes, mumbling about ways to maim him and get away with it.

After a few moments of thinking about maiming techniques, Christina looks up at me. "Seriously, Eaton, why are you just showing up? Why now?"

I shrug, taking a seat on a foot rest, leaning forward on my elbows. "I don't know. To tell you the truth, I don't even know what I'm going to say to Tris when I see her. Just…I've been a mess since the day her parents went to the hospital and she called me."

"Why are you a wreck? You didn't even show up to the hospital!" She accuses, looking irritated.

"I did show up. You were asleep in the waiting room and Tris was with Caleb, asleep. I left shortly after arriving, but I still showed up. I just…I've felt terrible about leaving and leaving her to deal with everything on her own…"

She interrupts me. "She wasn't alone – she's had me."

That was true and I knew Christina was the one person Tris trusted with anything and everything. "I just…I need to know how she's doing."

Christina looks distant for a few seconds and then shakes her head. "I don't know, truthfully. I mean, the day her parents died, she was an absolute wreck. She was crying the entire time – I had never seen her cry so much. But then after we left the hospital and she went back home, she just became…emotionless. I don't know. She was distant. She didn't react to anything mentioned by her parents and even at the funeral she didn't cry. I've been waiting for her to break but she hasn't. She gets up in the morning, goes to class, comes home and does her work. I mean, on the weekends she goes out and parties, but she's a freshman in college – who doesn't do that? But her behavior at the parties is just…it's destructive. She gets extremely drunk and I have to drag her home." Christina sighs. "I'm scared for her. I've tried to talk her into going to see a therapist, but she won't hear it. I know it isn't healthy for her to be bottling all her feelings about her parents up and then you leaving was kind of a dick move." I drop my head in shame, the guilt ripping into me again. "You left at such a terrible time."

"If I knew how bad she was, I would have come sooner, I swear it. I just thought it would be better for her to mourn without me. I would just be a reminder of her parents' hate. She didn't need that."

Christina nods, running her fingers through her hair. "I guess I can kind of see your point. But look, she isn't going to be very happy to find you here. She might even get pissed at me for talking to you. But you really do need to tell her that you were at the hospital that night – she's hell-bent on believing that you weren't."

I nod.

"I didn't know you two were a thing for long, a few weeks before graduation, but I knew that she was happier than she's ever been before. I saw something change in her around the time you two started dating. She was happier and she was just…herself a lot more. She became so much more confident and sure of herself. You're good for her, Eaton. And I don't know how she's affected you, but I do know that she's a really good person and any guy who dates her is extremely lucky."

"Yeah, I know and I kind of screwed that up." She nodded her head in agreement and I sighed. "And will you please stop calling me Eaton? I'm not your teacher anymore, you can call me Tobias."

She smiles at that. "Yeah, well, you're going to have to suck it up."

It's quiet for a little bit, neither of us knowing what to say next. I was out of reasons to explain my disappearance these last few months and I doubt Christina wanted to ask me about anything that went on.

Finally, I decide to ask her something that's been bothering me since I first arrived. "Do you think…do you think she'll forgive me?"

Christina sighed, shrugging. "I don't know. A few months ago I would have said definitely but now, she's just…different. So, I can't really say. I'm sorry."

Just then the front door opens and Tris's voice floats from the entryway into the living room. "Chris, I'm back. And I went grocery shopping so you're going next time and I also picked up some of those mint cookies you like…"

She appears in the living room and looks up, her face going slack. I shoot up from the footrest, holding my hands out in a defensive manner. "What are you doing here?" She asks, anger in her voice.

"Tris…" I begin. "I can explain."

* * *

**I know that this was a short chapter, but I had never really planned for it to be too long of a chapter - just enough to cover why Tobias wasn't in the last few chapters. **

**Also, I'm not planning on making this story too much longer, maybe up to 35 chapters. Maybe. I don't want to drag it out too long but I don't want to make it too short to leave questions unanswered or anything. **


	27. Chapter 27

Chapter Twenty-Seven

"No, no! Absolutely not. Get the hell out of my house, right now." I demanded, clutching my house keys tightly in my hand. My grip was so tight I could feel one of my keys digging into my hand.

Christina stands up, stepping in front of Tobias. "Tris, just…hear him out." I gawked at her, surprised that she would be defending him and suggesting that I actually listen to him. She knew what he did to me and she knew how hurt I was because of it. She turns around and faces Tobias, giving him a small nod. "I'm going to go to work," She says, turning to look back at me. "and you two are going to talk this out. And if you are going to fight…please keep it down so the cops don't get called."

With that, she leaves and Tobias and I stand in the living room, facing each other.

"Tris…" He says and I shake my head.

I hold up my hand, stopping him. "No, absolutely not. You do not get to speak to me. Not after what you did."

Turning my back to him, I pick up the grocery bags off of the floor and head into the kitchen. I drop the bags on the counter and start putting the food away in the right spots. Footsteps follow me into the kitchen and I can feel Tobias watching me.

"I know you really don't want to see me right now, but if you just let me explain…"

I turn around so quickly I'm surprised I didn't get whiplash. My cheeks burn and the tips of my hands feel extremely warm. "You don't get to explain. You disappeared on me for five months and didn't even try to talk to me! You left me when I needed you the most. So no, you don't get to explain yourself and you don't get to apologize." I could feel tears burning behind my eyes and I didn't know if I wanted to cry because I was angry or because I was upset. Maybe it was both.

"I went to the hospital…" He blurts out and I glare at him. "The night that your parents got into the accident and you called me, I showed up."

I shake my head, ready to argue but he continues. "No you didn't."

"Yes, I did. It was after midnight and you were asleep and I just…I didn't want to bother you and I thought that my being there would be worse for you."

"I called you! How the hell does that even make sense?" I scoff.

He crosses his arms across his chest and shrugs. "I don't know and I know it sounds like an excuse. But I did come to see you. But I just…I didn't know how your parents were doing and I didn't want them to have to deal with seeing me there. It was a stupid thing to do, I should have stayed – or at least gone back in the morning."

"Instead you just ran and didn't call or anything. That's not what good boyfriends do." I turn my back to him, putting the rest of the food away. I gripped the edge of the counter, biting the inside of my cheeks to keep from crying.

The floor creaks behind me as Tobias steps towards me. I tense up as I feel his hand touch my shoulder. "Tris, I didn't know what to say to you after that."

I shrug off his hand, backing up against the counter. "Stop…" He stops, his hand falling to his thigh. "You left me…you don't get to touch me."

He takes a small step forward. "I'm so sorry and I know that just saying sorry won't make up for my major fuck up. But I will do everything I possibly can to make it up to you." My chest tightened when I looked at him, at his dark blue eyes. The same eyes that had made me weak months ago. "I still love you."

"You left me…" As if I hadn't already reminded him of that the past twenty minutes. As if it wasn't obvious. "You just left me!" I shove his chest, taking both of us by surprise. He stumbles backwards and I step forwards, angry. "You left me!" I shout at him, slapping his chest. He grabs my wrists to stop me from hitting him, and I try to shake him off. I just keep shouting that he left me at him until I feel like a dam in me bursts open and tears just overflow. "You. Just. Left." I stutter out between sobs.

My legs give out and I fall forwards, towards Tobias. He quickly grabs me around the waist, holding me gently – probably worried about how I'd react to him touching me. My chest heaves with loud sobs and I can't stop.

Everything over the past five months bursts out of me. I had kept everything bottled up, ignoring Christina and Caleb's warnings that it wasn't healthy. All the pain over losing my parents and the pain over losing Tobias. The anger I felt towards whoever killed my parents and the anger over Tobias ditching me.

But he was here. He was right here and seeing him again reminded me of losing my parents. And I couldn't stop crying.

I felt myself sliding to the floor, the cold tiled floor hitting my knees. Tobias follows me, pulling me into his chest, his arms wrapped tightly around my shoulders. "Tris…" He groans into my hair, the sound one of pain.

I grip his shirt tightly, like it's a lifeline. I feel myself moving closer to him, and I realize it's not him pulling me closer – I was subconsciously pulling myself closer to him.

Eventually I cried myself out, and was left dried out and hiccupping on the kitchen floor. Tobias never moved an inch, he just held me. My body felt weak and limp after crying for so long, I couldn't move.

"Come here." Tobias shifts his arms so that one is under my legs and the other is behind my back and then he stands up, lifting me like I'm a small child who weighs nothing – though that can't be true because I definitely gained weight after everything that I've eaten and the alcohol I've consumed since starting freshman year. "Which room is yours?" He grunts, standing between both my room and Christina's. I nod my head to the left and he nudges open the door with his foot and then gently places me down on the bed.

He disappears and I feel the dam threatening to break again, even though there was probably nothing left to leak out. My chest felt hollow.

When he comes back, he has a glass of water and places it down on my bedside table. Tobias looks at me for a second and then turns to leave. I reach my hand out and grab his hand, stopping him. "Don't leave me…please." I beg.

Without giving me any time to take it back, he sits down on the bed next to me and I pull myself closer to him, breathing in his familiar, calming scent. I close my eyes, sniffling.

I feel Tobias wrap an arm around me and we sit in silence for a while. Finally, after I pull myself together enough to speak again, I ask him, "Why?" My voice is still low.

"Why what?" He asks, his fingers combing through the ends of my hair. The motion felt familiar and it caused an aching in my chest. I reach behind me, pulling my hair over my shoulder.

"Why didn't you try to apologize before? Why now?"

I can feel him shrugging. "They were talking about the new mayor on the news and then that brought up your…parents…and I just, I haven't been able to stop thinking about you for months. You've been in my head since that night and I've felt terrible. I've been wracked with guilt and I knew I would have to apologize and the longer I waited, the worse it would be." His fingers brush the length of my upper arm lightly, raising goosebumps along where his fingers touch. "I know you're still pissed at me and I don't deserve your forgiveness, but Christina told me about your recklessness lately and I really don't think it's safe, Tris."

I close my eyes, fighting back more tears. "You're not my boyfriend anymore." I mumble.

"That doesn't mean that I don't still love you and that I'm not allowed to worry about you. Just…if you need someone to talk to – talk to me. Don't fight off your feelings with alcohol because, trust me, it will only come back to bite you in the ass."

He was silent for a long time and I was thinking back to when he said he was wracked with guilt. I was worried about how he dealt with that guilt and I felt a familiar tugging on the inside of my chest. Instinctively, my hands on his shirt tighten and I bite the inside of my cheeks.

Of course, I knew he was right about the drinking. Caleb and Christina had both constantly warned me about what might happen and I had even gone to a therapist for one session. It was supposed to be for me to talk about my feelings about my parents' deaths but it just turned into the therapist asking me a million questions and me giving one worded answers. Until she had asked me about how I was coping with my grief. I told her about the parties I went to and how I had a good time at time. She warned me that mixing alcohol with grief was extremely dangerous and how it could lead to over-intoxication and even losing control of my grief and having it be more painful than it really was.

Naturally I ignored the warnings, but I did watch how much alcohol I consumed. I made sure that I never got close to blacking out – maybe a little light headed, but never black out drunk.

"When you were gone…what did you do?" I ask, staring towards the foot of my bed.

He chuckles once, the humor lost in his voice. "Are you asking me what I did or if I was dating anybody?" I shrug. "No, I was not dating anybody. Like I said, you were pretty much on mind all day. I was more worried about how you were handling yourself and what happened rather than who I was hanging out with. And I was pretty much in a drunken stupor all summer."

I push myself up to a sitting position, feeling slightly lightheaded from the quick movement. "You shouldn't have been worrying about me." Putting myself in dumb situations was one thing, but Tobias doing it? I suddenly felt extremely guilty.

He gives me a crooked smile. "It's a habit." He says as he pushes some of my hair behind my ear.

I shake my head, reaching for his hand. I briefly glance at him and see that there's a small hint of doubt in his eyes. I hold onto his hand. "You're not my boyfriend…" I remind him, looking back at him. The doubt in his eyes his gone and he glances at our hands and then at my face. "Stop worrying about me."

"I've tried. I suck at it." He laughs and for the first time in a long time – I smile back. He leans towards me, still smiling. "I'm terrible at breaking old habits."

"Tobias…" I breathe, my voice barely audible. I was too focused on how close we were. I could feel his breath against my cheek and I could see the small hint of green under the blue sapphire in his eyes.

Part of my brain was telling me to back away from him and to tell him to leave and never to talk to me again. But the other part was telling myself to move closer quicker and to beg him to stay with me. That part didn't want him to leave me ever again and it just wanted him to pull me as close to him as he possibly could.

He's staring at me, I realize, and I feel my cheeks become warm. When I look at him, I feel that familiar feeling in my stomach that he always stirred up when we were together – like a million little butterflies were flying around in my stomach.

Without giving it another thought, I lean forward and crush my lips against his.

He's reasonably surprised by a second and then his arms are wrapped around my waist and I'm shifting myself so that I'm straddling his legs – one leg on either side of his. I grip the hair at the nape of his neck to get closer to him.

His hands move from my waist, under my shirt and I shiver from the contact. I let go of his hair and move my hands to the hem of his shirt, pulling it up and over his head and then leaning back in to kiss him again.

My hands trace down his back and I can almost see the tattoo covering his back and the marks from his childhood that he wanted covered up. His hands grip the bottom of my shirt and he pulls it up and over my head, tossing it onto the floor. His arms wrap around my waist once again and he presses his lip against my throat and then my neck. My breathing is loud and heavy, but I'm too distracted to be embarrassed.

We both immediately come to a halt when we hear the front door opening and then Christina's voice travelling down the hallway. "Tris? I'm back."

Tobias and I glance at each other and my only thought is that I don't want to move. "Christina…" He sounds worried but I just shake my head.

"She won't bother me if my door's shut." I lean back in and press my lips to his once more, but we're interrupted by a knock at my door.

"Tris, I'm going over to Will's for the night. I'll be home later tomorrow and we can talk about what happened with you and Tobias." I listened for the sound of her footsteps and a few minutes later, the front door closed and locked.

I focused back on Tobias, who was leaning back against the bed's headboard and his hands had dropped to rest on my waist. "Tris, we really need to talk about this…" He nods gestures between us and I can't help but groan.

Sighing, I lean back on Tobias's legs, and shake my head. "Tobias, no. I'm not your student anymore! I'm in college and I'm legal. Do not pull any of this shit again."

He shakes his head. "That's not what I'm saying. I'm completely aware that you're in college and no longer my student. But you just said that we're not together anymore."

I shrug. "So? People have random hook-ups all the time."

Tobias looks hurt by my words and I mentally kick myself for the word vomit. "I don't see you as that, though. I've never seen you like that, God Tris." He lifts me off of him and then reaches for both of our shirts. He pulls his on over his head and tosses me mine, sitting back down next to me. "I love you!"

I rub my eyes and sigh. "Tobias, I just…I can't do this. Not right now, not tonight."

He scoffs. "But sex is completely okay?"

Offended, I reach for my pillow and throw it at him as hard as I can. "You know it was never going to lead to that, you ass." He catches the pillow with no problem and then tosses it back next to me.

"That was rude, I'm sorry. I know how you feel about that. Just…I really do want to talk about this," He gestures between us again and then reaches for my hand. "about us. I want us to work out."

I look at him, feeling sad. "Tobias, I really don't know – "

He stops me and says, "No more arguing tonight. You can argue with me all you want tomorrow. It's late and you look exhausted. What time do you have classes tomorrow?"

Sighing, I give up trying to fight him. For now. "I have one eight a.m. class and then I'm done."

Nodding, he scoots himself closer to me. "Okay, so after that we can talk – or if you want, we can argue." Smiling, he laughs. "Whichever you prefer."

I throw another pillow at him, but this time it's more as a joke and less out of anger. He caught it and was still laughing. "Fine." I grumble. "But any injuries that you sustain during the argument is not on me."

"I will take my chances." He promises. "Oh, one more thing: what's the tattoo on your collarbone?" He asks me, stretching his arm out, his fingers brushing across the three black birds on my collarbone.

"The top two were for my parents and then I thought that it would be reasonable to get one for Caleb because I almost lost him to that accident." A lump forms in my throat and I bite my bottom lip. "I just needed to do something to remember them – for myself. I'm so tired of seeing their faces plastered in the media and how everyone's still mourning for them. They were my parents – nobody else knew them."

Tobias cups my chin, forcing me to look at him. He doesn't say anything and it's the quiet that causes me to start crying again.


	28. Chapter 28

Chapter Twenty-Eight

My eight a.m. class was an Intro to Psychology class and I hated myself for scheduling it at eight in the morning. I may have lived close to campus, but I wasn't actually on campus – more like a good ten-minute walk to get to class – which meant that I still have to wake up early to get to campus on time.

When I woke up that morning, I was alone in my bedroom. I don't know whether I expected to be alone or if I expected for Tobias to stay with me. But he hadn't and he was snoring away on the couch in the living room when I went to grab a granola bar from the kitchen on my way out the door.

The class was a two-hour class. Thankfully it was the only class I had on Fridays and it was my only two-hour class, meeting once a week.

After class, I had expected to head home to talk to Tobias, but I saw him sitting in the quad, two coffees in his hands. I approached him and he handed the coffee to me. "It's French Vanilla and lots of sugar. Don't worry."

I thank him and take a sip. "I really hope you aren't expecting to talk out here because it's freezing cold and I don't feel like having a private conversation in public."

He stands up, shrugging. "Wherever you want to talk, I'm fine with."

We start walking back in the direction of my apartment. We don't speak on the way back. I'm mainly too occupied with drinking my coffee and letting the caffeine wake me up. Once back at the apartment, I unlock the building door and then head up the five flights of stairs to my apartment.

Christina's still not home and I realize that she's in classes all day – she wasn't as smart as me when it came to planning her classes. She was jam-packed on Fridays with classes, not finishing up until after four.

Tobias takes a seat on the couch and I go into the kitchen, tossing away my empty coffee cup and grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge.

"How has Caleb been since…the accident?" Tobias asks, watching me as I sit down on the opposite side of the couch from him – keeping my distance.

I shrug. "He says he's fine, but he has to go back to the hospital once a month for the next year. Just to make sure the swelling in his brain really is down and that it doesn't flare back up." Looking at Tobias, I frown. "But that's not what I want to talk about."

He nods. "What do you want to know?"

My leg starts to shake and I don't know if it's because I'm frustrated or if I'm angry. My anger over seeing Tobias again went down last night, but that doesn't mean it's completely gone. It's so far from gone. It's like how when you go to a fancy restaurant, the waiter is refilling your water glass every five minutes so that it never goes below half a glass.

My anger just kept replacing itself.

"Why did you just leave?" I ask, surprising myself when I look straight at him and I don't try and avoid his gaze.

"Tris, I already explained…"

Nodding, I interrupt him. "Yeah, I know. You explained why you left the hospital. You never explained why you left _me_. You didn't explain why you broke up with me on prom night and didn't even call me or anything!"

He gives me a measuring look, like he's not completely sure if I'm being serious or not. "Jeanine Matthews had called me into her office and your father was there. She went on to say how he had informed her about an inappropriate relationship that was going on between me and a student. She said that if the relationship didn't stop, your father was going to press charges and I would be fired and it would be bad for the school's image. I didn't have a choice, Tris. I knew being with you was a risk, but it was one that was completely worth it. I didn't expect any of this to happen and if my job hadn't been at risk…"

My stomach churns and I can feel tears streaming down my cheeks. "So…because your job was at risk – you broke it off with me?"

Tobias shakes his head. "I don't care about my job. I was more worried about your reputation. If your Dad did go through with his threat, you would might have been kicked out of Elmhurst and lost your scholarship. I was worried for you."

"Do you really think that my Dad would throw me under the bus? Especially when he is – was – running for mayor? It wouldn't have named me, he would have named you and just you."

The look on Tobias's face tells me he hadn't thought about that. He truly believed that my father would throw me to the sharks – that he would leak my name to the media about my relationship with Tobias. I should be insulted, but I'm not.

"Tris…I didn't think…" He shakes his head, searching for words.

I shrug. "He might have done it. Who knows? Maybe he would've come up with a great story about how he 'saved' me from an older man. A lot of people would've bowed at his feet for saving a young girl's virtue."

He stared at me, shocked. "I knew my Dad threatened you. I confronted him about it and he told me everything. He said he would do anything to 'protect' me. Then I accused him of only caring about his campaign for mayor." I shrugged and felt a burning behind my eyes. "We were fighting when he…when he…. when he passed." My voice shook and I could feel the tears starting again.

Tobias moves a few inches towards me and I automatically pull my legs into my chest, trying to put more space between us. "You two were fighting because of me? Tris…I'm so sorry."

"We weren't arguing over you – not entirely. It was because he lied to me and he went behind my back and did something stupid and…I told him I wouldn't be able to forgive him." My voice quivers and then the tears start to pour down my cheeks and I can't stop them. "I didn't even get to tell him I forgave him or that I loved him. He didn't hear me say any of that one last time. He died thinking I hated him."

There's a shifting motion and then Tobias is right next to me, pulling me into his chest. I want to fight it, to tell him that I don't need him to comfort me – but I can't speak. I had never really thought about that night; it hurt too much. I never even realized that he died thinking that I hated him and I suddenly felt overwhelmed with guilt and hate for myself.

"He knows you loved him, Tris." Tobias whispers, pressing his lips to the top of my head. "And I know you feel horrible right now, but I just really, really need you to know that I never wanted to end things between us. It was never a plan of mine and I hadn't really seen us coming to an end – especially when it did." I lean back, out of his arms, and look at him. He sighs, reaching for my hands. "What I'm trying to say is that…I want us to be together again."

I shake my head slowly, trying to comprehend what he's saying and also trying to stop crying. "Tobias…I – I can't. You just left me. That's not something I can easily forgive!"

Gently pulling my hands away from his, I wipe the last few tear drops away. "I want to forgive you, I really do! But I just…I need time."

He nods and then looks at me, worried. "Do you still love me?"

My stomach twists and I bite the insides of my cheeks. "I-I don't know. This is all extremely complicated and I-I…I don't know how I feel about anything right now!" I exclaim, frustrated.

Tobias doesn't really ask anything else and we sit in the living room – both on opposite ends of the couch – and Christina gets home around three that afternoon, her last class having been cancelled. She looks understandably shocked by the sight of Tobias sitting on the couch, but she doesn't acknowledge him. "Are you still going out tonight?" She asks me, glancing at Tobias quickly and then back at me.

Nodding, I stand up. "Yeah, I really need to get out for a few hours." I give her a quick hug and then head into my room.

I'm sitting cross-legged on my bed, with some of my Psychology homework spread out in front of me, when there's a knock on my door and Christina opens it slightly and slides in through the crack.

"Are you okay?" She asks, sitting on the end of my bed. I nod, looking down at my textbook. "Why is he still here? Are you two back together?"

Shaking my head, I twirl my pen in between my fingers. "No, and he's still here because I haven't told him to leave yet." I drop my pen onto my textbook and run my fingers through my hair, shaking my head in frustration. "I want him to leave because of everything he did, but I just can't bring myself to tell him to leave. I'm terrified of him leaving again. I'm worried it might cause me more harm than good."

"What do you mean?" Christina asks, tilting her head.

"When he left – back at prom – I didn't really think he was actually gone, ya know? I expected him to hide out until graduation and then he'd be back. And then the car accident happened and I thought he would show up when I called him. When he didn't, I let myself believe that he was actually gone and that he didn't want me. And after a while, I was fine with it. But then yesterday he shows up and I just…I feel like a piece of me was glued back together after my parents died. And I'm terrified that if he leaves, I'll be broken again." I look up at Christina. "I don't want to be broken again."

"You won't be broken again. You still have me." She reminds me.

I nod, running my hands down my face.

Later that night, around eight o'clock, I packed away my homework for the weekend and started to get ready to go out. I pulled on a pair of black jeans with a red blouse and a pair of black combat boots.

Christina always came to the parties with me, even the ones at the frat houses – even though she really hated frats. But when I walked into the living room, Tobias was leaning against the wall in the hallway with his arms crossed tightly across his chest. Christina was looking guilty, standing in the doorway to the living room.

"What's going on?" I ask both of them.

Tobias looks at Christina and she ducks her head. "I'm coming with you guys."

I make a face. "What? No, you're not coming!"

He rolls his eyes and I try to focus on his face and not his arms that are very visible in his black sweater. "If you're going to be reckless, I'm going to make sure you don't do anything too stupid."

"You're not my boyfriend." I remind him, glaring daggers at him.

Tobias shrugs nonchalantly. "That doesn't mean I don't still care about you. Just because you want to be reckless and don't want me around doesn't mean I'm going to sit back and let you put yourself in harm's way."

Crossing my arms over my chest, I say, "I can take care of myself."

"I don't think it would hurt to have someone else backing us up in case something happened." Christina butts in and I look at her.

"Not helping, Chris." She shrugs and shrinks back against the wall. "This is a college party, Tobias. You've graduated already."

He laughs, shaking his head. "I can still pass for a college student – I didn't graduate that long ago."

"He's right." Christina speaks up again.

I sigh. "Again, not helping." She holds her hands up in an apologetic manner and I start talking to Tobias again. "Fine, you can come. But I don't want to hear anything about 'morals' or anything of the like. And don't hover."


	29. Chapter 29

Chapter Twenty-Nine

I still wasn't thrilled with Tobias coming to the party. The whole point of me going to the party tonight was to forget the things that we talked away – to relax and stop feeling like I was carrying a bag of bricks on my back.

The party was at a Fraternity at the edge of campus, so the three of us took a taxi – Tobias sat up front, thankfully.

Unsurprisingly, nobody bats an eye when we arrived, Tobias trailing behind Christina and myself. Of course Tobias had been right – he didn't look much older than most college seniors did. He fit right in.

It was infuriating.

Once we were inside, I headed straight for the keg and grabbed a red solo cup, filling it to the top. I grimaced when I took a sip – of course the fraternity would have cheap keg beer. Turning away from the keg, I make my way towards a private corner and lean against the wall, looking around the party. Christina is talking to a group of people and I see Tobias leaning against the wall opposite of me. We make eye contact and he nods to me. I roll my eyes and shove off the wall.

I make my way through the house, wandering around. There are framed pictures hanging on the wall of different years and different fraternity members. I'm in another room full of people – well, couples mainly. And they're all making out.

Disgusted, I turn back around and almost run into Tobias. "Fuck, Tobias." I exclaim, surprised. "What did I say about hovering?"

"Sorry. I won't do it again." He promised and then glances down at my cup. "As long as you don't have too many of those."

Groaning, I walk past him and head back into the room I was just in.

For a good part of the party, I hang around Christina and the group of people she spends most of the time talking to. I can feel Tobias watching me the whole time and I keep refilling my cup, unaware of how much I'm drinking. At least, I'm unaware until I feel my head starting to get fuzzy and the room starts to tilt.

I go to sit down on the couch and Christina follows, shooting me a worried glance. I wave my hand at her, letting her know I'm okay.

Everyone starts talking again and I close my eyes for a few seconds to help stop the room from spinning. I look back up and focus on the far wall and feel confident that I'm not going to get dizzy again and that I'm not going to throw up.

When I do look up, I notice that Tobias is leaning against the wall again. But this time he isn't looking at me – he's talking to someone else, some girl. The girl was tall and pretty, very, very pretty. She had long legs that were visible in the mini skirt she was wearing and she had long brown hair that touched the middle of her back. She was smiling and giggling at whatever Tobias was saying to her.

Standing up, I suddenly find myself trying to make my way over to where the two are conversing. However, halfway across the room some guy swerves in front of me, causing me to stop walking. I sway slightly and he grabs my arm, steadying me. "Thanks." I mumble, trying to move past him.

"You're Tris, right?" He asks and I finally look at him, nodding. His face comes into focus and something about him seems familiar. "We have Intro to Psych together." I nod and glance over his shoulder. "My name's Alex? We worked together on an assignment?"

I focus back on him, shaking my head. "Yeah, sorry. I forgot – I'm really out of it tonight." I sigh, crossing my arms. "Can I help you with something?"

Alex shoves his hands into his front pockets and gives me what I assume is supposed to be an alluring smile. "Maybe you'd want to go somewhere else? Somewhere quieter?"

I can't help but laugh at him and then cover my mouth. "Oh, you were serious. I am so sorry. Um, I'd really rather not. It's nothing against you, just that…I'm not really interested in a relationship."

"Who said anything about a relationship?" He steps closer to me and I shake my head again.

"Alex…I really don't…" I put my hand up, trying to push him away, but he grips my elbows so that I can't move. "Let go of me, please."

He leans in closer and, thankful for my short stature, I'm able to dodge his face but I can't escape his arms. "Dude, she said let her go." A voice growls close to both of us. We both turn towards the voice and Tobias's face is dark and I've never seen him look so angry. "Let her go."

Alex just looks at him and I can see that he's sizing him up, debating whether or not he can take on Tobias. Before he really looked him over, Alex looked like he actually thought he had a chance against Tobias, but now he looks like he'd rather walk away than make a fool of himself. But beer and testosterone have never mixed well in the history of forever, so he simply says, "And what are you going to do about it?"

Wrong question. Tobias pulls his hands off of my arms and steps in between Alex and myself. He doesn't say anything, he just stares down at him and then pulls his arm back and then punches forward. His fist connects with Alex's jaw and there are shocked gasps from around the room.

"Tobias!" I exclaim, grabbing his arm. I try and tug him backwards and away from Alex, who is keeled over with his hand gripping his jaw. "Outside!" I growl at him, beyond angry.

He stops resisting and walks ahead of me, practically jumping down the front steps and waiting for me to catch up once he's on the lawn. "What the hell was that?!" I yell, steaming.

Tobias gives me a confused look. "What was…? He was touching you when you told him to leave you alone!" He yells back, pointing at the house.

"I can handle myself! I had it under control!" He scoffs, crossing his arms over his chest. "What?" I demand, glaring at him.

He shakes his head. "It didn't look like you had it under control."

"Like you even noticed while you were flirting away with that girl!" I accused. He looked taken aback, probably not expecting me to point that out. He probably just expected me to agree with him and admit that I didn't have it under control. Asshole.

When he speaks again, his voice is strained – like he's trying his best to keep calm and not yell again. "The point is – I helped you. I know you can handle yourself, but I made the chivalrous decision to step in and help you. A simple thank you would do."

I roll my eyes. My anger slowly starts to ebb as we stand on the front lawn, facing each other. Finally, I speak up. "Why?"

"Why what?" He looks annoyed, like he doesn't feel like fighting again.

"Why did you really come with us tonight? I know that you would never normally spend your Friday night out, partying with a bunch of drunk college kids."

Tobias looks at me as if I'm blind. He shakes his head in disbelief. "Seriously? Do I really have to spell it out for you, Tris?" I barely have time to ask him what the hell he means when he blurts out, "I still love you and I want to be with you! That's the only reason I went to your apartment and that's the only reason I'm here! I want to be with you!"

I stare at him, conflicted, with my mouth hanging open. "Tobias…" I start to say, but I'm silenced by him; he strides over in front of me and takes my face between his hands, pressing his lips against mine. This kiss is different from the other night – I had initiated that kiss and it was mainly to forget pain and hurt – but this kiss was him trying to prove to me how much he still loved me and I felt my heart flutter momentarily. I let myself fall into the kiss, letting my hands find their place behind his neck.

Soon, too soon, I force myself to pull away. "If you think you can just come back into my life and tell me you still love me and I'll forgive everything and be that same love-sick high schooler, you're wrong." I take a deep breath, taking a step back from him. "I've changed and what you did – that's not something I can easily forgive." Meeting his gaze, I stare into those blue, blue eyes that still make my stomach twist in a good way. "I need time."

"So you just…walked away? You actually left him on the front lawn?" Christina asks, dipping her spoon into a large tub of chocolate chip ice cream. When I nod, she laughs. "I really didn't think you would ever do that."

I make a face. "What the hell do you mean?"

She smiles, taking another bite of ice cream. "Tris, you were completely head over heels for him in high school! I really believed that you would let him off the hook."

Shrugging, I drop my spoon onto the wooden floor next to me. Christina and I were in the living room, lounging against about thirty different pillows while sitting on the floor and flipping through the movie channels. "I want to but I just…it still hurts."

Christina nods and taps my leg reassuringly. "I get it and you have every right to make him wait. You deserve time. But just…don't wait too long. He does love you and he has apologized. Even if he did fuck up, he still loves you. And even if you don't want to say it out loud, I know that you still love him."

"I don't know how I feel about him anymore, Chris…" I lie, staring at the floor.

Christina laughs, and places the ice cream tub on the floor and then turns to look at me. "That's complete and total bullshit and you know it, Tris. You still love him and just the fact that you didn't throw him out that first night proves it. If you didn't love him, you wouldn't have talked to him or let him explain himself." She takes a breath and then continues. "Don't just throw everything you two have away. That's completely pointless. Not a lot of people get to have what you two have. You can't give it up. It won't be so easy to find that kind of love again. And normally I would tell you to drop his ass right now, but he's good for you. I've never seen you happier than when you're with him."

"When did you get all deep?" I joke, trying to change the topic.

She laughs again and shrugs. "College makes you smarter, duh."

Later that night, after Christina and I turn in for the night after a few movies, I lay in my bed and stare at the ceiling. I can't fall asleep. I still feel guilty for leaving Tobias at the party but I didn't know what else to do. Was I supposed to let him come home with me? Let him crash on my couch again?

I couldn't do that. I didn't want him the house while I was still trying to figure everything out. If he was here with me, it would make everything so much more complicated for me. I didn't need complicated.

To make matters worse, he had kept calling me throughout the day, waiting for me to pick up. I eventually had to shut my phone off. It was ironic, to be honest. I had gotten pissed at him for never calling me after the accident and for never calling me in the five months he just disappeared – but yet, here I was, ignoring his calls and refusing to talk to him. But I wasn't going to ignore him for five months! I wasn't that cruel.

I kept going through our last argument in my head until around three-thirty in the morning, when I was finally able to shut my brain off and fall asleep.


	30. Chapter 30

Chapter Thirty

I was dreaming.

I knew I was dreaming because it was the same dream I've had at least twice a week for the past five months. I was sitting at the round kitchen table in my old house and both my parents sat in their usual spots, both of them looking at me and, most importantly, alive. They both sat in their seats, with their hands folded in front of them on the table. They both wore looks on their faces that I've only seen one other time – when I told them about my relationship with Tobias.

They don't say anything; they just stare at me with that "we're disappointed in you" look on their faces. I knew that they weren't going to say anything – they never did.

And then suddenly I'm standing on then suddenly I'm standing on stage, the same stage I walked across when I graduated from high school. There's no crowd of graduating seniors and no family members sitting on the bleachers. There's just me – standing in the middle of the stage. And then there's a familiar gray SUV in the middle of the gym, the car is mangled and twisted, no longer shiny and pretty. Both my parents' bodies are hanging out of the car, blood and cuts covering their bodies. My father's body is lying on top of the bent hood, his head and arms twisted in unnatural ways and my mother's body is hanging out the window. There's nothing that I can possibly do at this point, but I still try and run towards them. The stage just keeps getting longer and longer, the car getting further and further away.

I wake up sweating and feeling like my heart is going to pound out of my chest. My stomach twists with nausea and I throw my covers off of my body. I pace the length of my room for a few minutes, trying to calm myself down.

Peeking out of my room, I see Christina asleep in her bed across the way and I can hear Will snoring beside her. I make my way to the bathroom and splash cold water on my face.

My hands still shake.

It's Sunday and I don't have to go into work today, so I get to spend all day thinking about the nightmare.

I don't want to think about the nightmare.

I don't want to think about how my parents died and how I almost lost my brother.

Hurrying back to my bedroom, I throw on a pair of jeans that were laying on my floor and then throw on a white tank top with my black jacket over top. I pull on my boots and head out the door.

Finding my way to Tobias's apartment is easy, I pretty much have the route memorized. And now that I actually live in the city, I'm closer to his place which makes it extremely convenient for moments like right now.

I told Tobias that I needed time and space to think about us – well, whatever was left of us. He obliged and he gave me space and time. He hasn't called, texted or showed up at my apartment. He's stayed by his word.

It's early – I know it's early. I don't care that it's early.

Tobias opens the door, looking like he just rolled out of bed. He probably did. "Tris…what are you doing here?" He asks, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

Pushing past him, I walk into his apartment and then turn to face him as he shuts the front door, a confused and worried expression on his face. "I've been thinking…about us…and I still love you, Tobias. I've loved you nonstop, even when you left me and didn't contact me for five months. I still loved you when you broke my heart." He opens his mouth to speak, but I just hold my hand up. "I'm still talking. I asked for you to give me some time to think things through and think about what our future would look like and I appreciate you for giving me time. But you hurt me. It hurt me so, so much when you didn't stay for me at the hospital. You had told me before that you loved me and that night…that night I needed you there…"

"You had Christina…" He interrupts and I get angry at him.

"I needed you just as much as I needed Christina!" I yell at him. "She was there because she's family! I wanted you there because I love you and I needed you!" I lower my voice. I didn't come here to argue or to yell. I came here to talk. "I wanted you to hold me and be there for me. I wanted to hear you say that everything was going to be okay, even if it was a lie. I needed that from you." Tears roll down my cheeks and my voice gets shaky. "And you weren't there."

Taking a deep breath, I wipe the tears out from under my eyes. "That's not why I came here, though. I came here because I still want us to work." Tobias looks at me. "I still love you and I don't want to lose you. It'll take time for me to forgive you for leaving, but I want you, Tobias. I don't want anyone else…just you." My nails are digging into my palms. "But if we stay together then it'll involve me forgiving you a lot and you forgiving me a lot. But I love you."

He stares at me for a while before striding over to where I'm standing and wrapping his arms around my waist, lifting me off the ground. He buries his face in the crook of my shoulder and I wrap my arms tightly around him.

"I promise I will make it up to you, Tris." He murmurs into my shoulder. "I won't ever leave you again."

I breathe in his familiar scent, the one that made me feel safe and loved. It wraps around me like his arms do, making me feel safe.

Tobias keeps one arm wrapped around me and cups the side of my face with his other hand, bringing his face down to mine, his lips brushing lightly against my lips. I can feel his heavy breathing against my face and his nose brushes against mine. Finally, he touches his lips to mine.

When his lips meet mine, I begin to feel a familiar warmth building in my stomach. The same one I felt the first time we kissed. It was a feeling I had grown to miss in the months we were separated and for the first time since my parents' deaths, I didn't feel numb – I felt…happy. There was still a tiny little voice in the back of my head, warning me that Tobias could leave me again, but I was able to quiet it.

Tobias is the one to break the kiss and then he presses his forehead against mine. I rest my hands on his hips, my breaths are shaky. "Stay with me today?" He asks and I look up at him, biting my bottom lip and then nod.

* * *

**So I know this is extremely short but I thought that this was a good chapter to keep short. I tried to write more (reason why it took me so long to post this chapter) but it just didn't flow properly. It would've ended awkwardly. But i appreciate each and everyone of you who are still reading the story and still commenting! **


	31. Chapter 31

Chapter Thirty-One

The following weeks went by quickly and Tobias stood by his promise to make everything up to me. During the week, I would stay at home with Christina and he would occasionally visit – when I wasn't overwhelmed with homework and studying – and on the weekends, I would spend the time at his apartment. It was nice because it gave us some privacy and alone time and it allowed Will and Christina to have the apartment to themselves for a while, since Will lived with Uriah and Al he was never alone.

My first semester of college came to an end and my finals took all of my energy and motivation out of me. For Christmas, I was going to Caleb's house to have dinner with him and Susan and I invited Tobias to come along. Caleb had given Tobias the stink eye for a good part of the night and he let him know that he wasn't going to forgive Tobias as easily as I have. After dinner, we had left and I promised Susan that I would make it to their wedding in early March – they had to move it after the accident, wanting to let Caleb heal before they got married and went to Bora Bora for their honeymoon.

A good majority of my winter break was spent either with Tobias or Christina and Will. If I was with the two of them, Al and Uriah usually caught up with us and whenever they could, Marlene and Lynn would show up every now and then – both busy with work and their winter break also started a bit after everyone else's did.

One weekend, however, Tobias had asked if I would spend the weekend. And I told him I would.

I was lounging across his bed on my side with my laptop propped open in front of me, as I scrolled through a few different websites. Tobias comes out of the bathroom, his hair wet after his shower and he's pulling on a black t-shirt. He stretches himself behind me so that his legs are behind my head and he wraps his left arm around my mid-section and looks at my laptop screen.

"Why are you looking at lake houses?" he asks, confused.

I shrug. "Because Christina missed her senior week because she stayed with me during – well, you know – and I felt really bad about it and I promised her that I would make it up to her. But I just don't want to go to a lake house, I'd much rather go to the beach or something, but it's not really like we have a lot of them around here."

Looking at him, he has a thoughtful look on his face. Raising an eyebrow, I narrow my eyes at him. "What are you thinking about?"

He gives me a knowing smile. "Well, my mother owns a pretty nice beach house out in Cape Cod…"

"Massachusetts?" I interrupt, stupidly.

Tobias nods, still smiling. "And I'm pretty sure she hasn't been there much lately. She actually kept it in case I ever wanted to escape Chicago for a bit. A lot of politicians and celebrities have houses out there, surprisingly."

I can't believe he's offering us a beach house and because I can't believe it, I narrow my eyes at him, suspicious. "What's the catch?"

His smile turns into a grimace and he looks younger, almost like a child. "I want you to come to D.C. with me. To meet my mother."

Meet his mother? I felt a familiar painful ache in my chest. It was the same one I got anytime anyone mentioned their mother – it was a mixture of jealousy and agony over losing mine. I wanted Tobias and I to work so, so badly but I didn't know if I wanted to meet his mother. I know he told me that he appreciated her for getting him away from his father, but she kind of focused more on her career than on Tobias. I already didn't like her.

My voice is small when I speak. "Why?"

He brushes a strand of hair away from my face, placing his thumb under my chin to force me to turn to look at him. "Because I love you and the people in my life deserve to know that." Seeing my face, he quickly adds on, "I don't need an answer right this minute, but just…think about it? For me?"

I nod. "Yeah, I will."

Smiling, he pushes himself up into a sitting position, pressing his lips to my cheek as he does. "Good, now…shut your laptop off and get dressed."

"Why?" I ask.

He smiles a bright smile and leans over me, closing my laptop screen for me. He places his palms flat on the bed on either side of me, his face inches from mine. "Because we are going to go do something that we have never done before." I probably have a dumbstruck expression on my face because I see some humor in his eyes. "We are going to go out for dinner. In public."

I can't help but laugh and nod in agreement. "That is something that we have never been able to do."

We head into the city and to a small restaurant right near Millennium Park. While waiting for a table, and even at the beginning of dinner, I feel like we're going to get in trouble. I feel like someone is going to pop around the corner and take Tobias away from me.

Tobias must notice my worry, because he reaches his hand across the table and squeezes my hand. "Hey, stop worrying about whatever it is you are worrying about." His thumb brushes over my knuckles and I feel a warm blush creep up my face.

"I know, I'm sorry. It's just…this is strange – us being out in public…together." He nods, listening. "I'm just still paranoid about us running into someone we know and getting in trouble."

He laughs once and rolls his eyes. "Who cares if someone sees us? They can't do anything about it anymore."

Somehow I'm able to relax a little bit through the night but as we're leaving, Tobias wraps an arm around my waist and pulls me close to his side as we walk. We took a cab to the restaurant, but Tobias insists that we walk back to his apartment and I don't argue with him. We take a shortcut through Millennium Park and Tobias pulls me towards the giant reflective bean.

We're standing under it, surrounded by a lot of tourists, even though it's getting pretty late. He turns me so that we're facing each other and then he grabs my face, smiling. "I have waited a long time to do this in public." He says before he kisses me.

I get lost in the kiss and forget that we're in public. I forget that I'm nervous about someone seeing. I forget that we're right under a giant reflective bean and with people surrounding us and a few even bumping into me. I'm only aware of Tobias – of his hands on my face and his lips pressing against mine. I forget about everything that's worrying me and for once, I don't feel anything besides pure bliss.

When Tobias breaks the kiss, the sights and sounds of the city come back to me. He moves his left hand down to grab my hand, lacing his fingers with mine and squeezing gently.

I smile at him and he gives me a quick peck on my lips and then starts to pull me back to his apartment. We walk back hand-in-hand and it feels nice. It feels strange being able to display our relationship, but I'm happy. I like being able to show that Tobias is mine and that I love him. It makes it all more real.

We get back to his apartment fifteen minutes later and he suggest watching a movie, but I'm too tired. "Are you okay? You've been sleeping in late but you're going to bed early…"

I try my best to give him a reassuring smile. "I'm fine. This past semester screwed up my sleep schedule – I'm just trying to fix it." I give him a kiss on the cheek and then head into the bedroom, changing into one of his t-shirts and climbing under the covers.

The gray SUV was in the middle of the large auditorium. The bodies were contorted again, one on the bent hood and another on the passenger side door. Both of them were covered in blood, bruises and cuts all over their bodies.

Not again…

I sit up in bed, sweating and shaking. Nausea churns in my stomach and I quickly throw the covers off of my body, running to the bathroom as quickly as I can. Crouching down over the toilet, I gag, my body heaving. My stomach doesn't empty anything and I continue to gag.

Once I'm sure I'm not going to be sick, I fall backwards onto my bottom, leaning against the wall. I'm thankful that the tiles are cold against my bare legs and I'm tempted to lie down and press my face against them but I hear a knock at the door. "Tris? Tris, are you okay?"

"No…" I don't even try to lie.

Tobias opens the door and glances down at me, worry all over his face. "Shit, Tris. What's wrong?" He kneels down and presses the palm of his hand to my forehead. "You're shaking…"

Was I? I wasn't even aware of it. I look at my hands and am surprised to see them shaking badly. "Tris, what is going on?" His voice is filled with anxiety.

"I had a bad dream…"

"What was the dream?" He asks, running his hand over my hair. I look over at him and feel my stomach clench. I can't lie to him. I need to tell him.

Taking a deep, shaky breath, I wipe away the stray tears. God, I was crying too. I was an absolute mess. "It was about my parents…it was their accident. I'm at graduation on stage and our car is…smashed…in the middle of the auditorium. My parents are – they're dead and I keep trying to reach them but I can't. I can't reach them no matter how much I try." I start to cry again and hide my face in my hands.

My stomach churns again and I feel Tobias pulling me into him. His arms wrap around me tightly and I clutch at his bare back. He kisses the top of my head and then leaves. I start to cry more and then he comes back with a glass of water, handing it to me.

He sits with me on the floor until I start to calm down and then he carries me back to the bedroom, laying me down gently. When he climbs back into bed, I instantly curl into his side and desperately search for his hand. I feel his fingers lace through mine and I calm down instantly. We lay in silence and Tobias doesn't ask me anything or try to say anything about my nightmare. He just holds me to him.

Is this what it would have been like if he had actually shown up to the hospital the night of the accident? Would he have held me this tightly in the hospital? Would we have come back to his place? Would he have protected me like he was now?

I don't know how long I was awake for after that, but I did end up falling asleep again. And this time when I fell asleep, I didn't have the nightmare. I didn't even dream. It was a peaceful sleep and it was nice to experience after months of sleepless nights.

In the morning when I wake up, I don't move or get out of bed. Tobias's arms are wrapped around my waist protectively and I can feel him breathing evenly against my back.

He begins to stir not too long after I wake up and I turn my head, trying to look at him. "I'm sorry about last night…" I apologize as he's blinking the sleep from his eyes. "I didn't want to trouble you."

I feel his lips press to the top of my head. "It's not your fault. It was just a dream. It can't hurt you."

"It can if it's been a reoccurring dream." I mumble. Tobias lifts his head and I turn to face him. He looks confused.

"Tris, have you had that same dream before?"

Nodding, I reach for his hand again, twisting my fingers through his. "It's been happening at least twice a week since my parents died."

Tobias sighs. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"It's not something I want to talk about."

He shifts, turning on his side and dropping my hand. He reaches towards me and brushes a strand of hair out of my face. "Maybe talking about it will be good for you."

Shaking my head, I stare up at the ceiling. "I'm not going to therapy."

He shakes his head. "I'm not saying you have to go to therapy. Maybe talk to Christina about it. Or you could talk to me."

"Not right now." I try to change the subject by kissing him. And it surprisingly works. His hand presses into the small of my back, pulling me closer to him. I place the palm of my hand against his bare stomach, feeling the solid muscle.

Something sparks in me and I feel myself trying to get closer to him. The hand on my lower back slides down to the back of my knee, hitching it over his leg.

Tobias breaks the kiss after a bit and I pout at him. "I know you're trying to distract me and while it's a nice distraction," his hand that was on the back of my knee moves slightly up to the back of my thigh. "I'm hungry and I'm assuming you probably are too."

He props himself up on his elbow and gives me a half smile. "I just want you to know that I'm here. I'm not going to be going anywhere, so if you need to talk to me about anything…please." He frowns. "I don't want you to be hurting."

* * *

**I'm so sorry this took so long to update! I'm overwhelmed by schoolwork and studying and working. I am in the last like...3 weeks of classes so I have papers and projects due so the next update won't be for awhile. And while I'm discussing updates - I'm only going to be going to 35 chapters. The story's run its course and i don't want to push it to the point where it becomes badly written because i have no material. **

**But I appreciate each and everyone of you who continued to stick with this story regardless of how long it took me to update. And i appreciate everyone's comments - they really, really helped with my motivation to continue the story. **


	32. Chapter 32

Chapter Thirty-Two

Washington D.C. was absolutely beautiful mid-May. Yeah, it was warmer than I would have expected, but it was still so nice.

Tobias and I had arrived in D.C. by mid-day and were greeted by a burly man in a black suit who introduced himself as our driver. He helped us get our bags into the back of the black Escalade and told us that Evelyn was running late at a meeting and wouldn't be back until dinnertime.

The driver took us to Evelyn's house – a three-story townhouse a few blocks from the Smithsonian and all the cool tourist-y attractions. We thanked the driver after unloading our bags and then headed inside. There was a key left under the doormat for Tobias and after we let ourselves in, we dropped our bags and then decided to head out to explore for a little bit.

We avoided the museums, knowing that they'd be way too packed, and instead walked along the reflecting pool, towards the Abraham Lincoln memorial.

Tobias twisted his fingers through mine and for once, I didn't worry about people staring at us or whispering – we weren't the most fascinating thing around all the beautiful memorials we passed. And there was also a very, very, very small chance of us running into anybody we knew from back home. It was a nice feeling, not having to constantly be looking over your shoulder to make sure someone wasn't watching or to make sure nobody you knew saw.

I liked being able to show off that Tobias was mine and I was his.

We sat down on the steps in front of the Abraham Lincoln memorial, looking out at the reflecting pond.

"My parents loved it here. Before they had Caleb and me, they had lived here for a while – my Mom loved the city here and being surrounded by the nation's government. She was in love with the history and all of the architecture." I sigh, a sad smile breaking through. My throat suddenly feels tight and there's a familiar ache in my chest and I know that I'm on the verge of crying.

Tobias wraps an arm around my waist and pulls me close to him, so that we're hip to hip. I lean my head on his shoulder, biting my quivering lip. "Do you miss them?" He asks. It's a stupid question and he probably knows how stupid of a question it is, but he probably still felt the need to ask.

Nodding, I wipe away a few stray tears. "All the time. I mean sometimes I forget that they're gone – I mean, I don't forget. It's just that I have moments where I just don't…feel. I don't feel like they're gone. My chest doesn't hurt and I'm not sad. It's like I'm numb again."

"Have you visited them since the…funeral?" He asks, looking up at a passing helicopter.

My stomach drops and I feel ashamed as I shake my head. "No. I've been…busy." That wasn't a complete lie. I've been busy with classes and studying and working when I'm not in class or studying. But I also didn't want to go see their graves, I didn't want to remember the day Caleb and I buried them. I don't want to relive the day of their accident.

"Tris, you really should visit them." He chastises. "It might even help with your nightmares."

He was probably right. I knew my nightmares had to do with missing my parents, but part of the reason I might be having them so often is because I feel guilty. I know I should be visiting their graves at least once a week, but I haven't even gone to the cemetery since the funeral. Caleb's been there multiple times once he had recovered. Me? I didn't want to see their names written on the headstones, reminding me they were never coming back.

"If it makes it any easier for you, I can go with you."

I didn't want to rely on Tobias. I didn't want to constantly need him when times get tough. I was my own person and I could survive without him – but I didn't want to and he wasn't going to make me.

We headed back to Evelyn's as soon as the sun dipped behind the Washington Memorial and when we entered the house, there was a distinct smell of pasta sauce and garlic.

"Tobias!" Evelyn was a short woman with shoulder length, brown hair. She had the same crooked nose that Tobias did, but her eyes weren't the same blue as his – he got that from his father.

"Evelyn." He nodded his head in acknowledgment. "This is Tris – my girlfriend."

She eyes me up and down, probably trying to figure out how old I am. I'm nineteen but I could still pass for sixteen, unfortunately, and standing next to Tobias doesn't help my case at all. He probably makes me look even younger. She doesn't look disapproving per say, but she doesn't look too thrilled about the obvious age difference between us.

Her studious gaze quickly turns into a gentle smile. "It is so nice to finally meet you, Tris." She says and embraces me, shocking me.

I'm slow to return the gesture and Tobias just shrugs, looking awkward standing behind his mother.

"I'm sorry for being so late." She apologizes, stepping away from me and glancing up at Tobias. "I was stuck in a meeting in the office. Politicians can sometimes act like children and never want to agree on anything unless it's their way. It's ridiculous, really. Anyways, I hope you two are hungry. I ordered from my favorite Italian restaurant."

She leads up to the dining room and she takes a seat at the head of the table, and Tobias and I each take a seat next to her.

The three of us eat in silence for a while, nobody wanting to talk and, honestly? The food was really good and I didn't want to talk because I was starving and just wanted to keep eating the pasta.

After a bit, Evelyn finally speaks up. "So, Tris…how old are you?" I glance at Tobias, who looks annoyed, and then glance back at Evelyn, feeling uneasy. "I mean…you look young but I know that you're not because Tobias told me you're in college."

"I'm nineteen, I just finished my freshman year of college…"

She looked over at Tobias and then back to me. "So how did you two meet?"

"I don't really think it's that important, Evelyn." Tobias states, fixing me a look that said not to tell her anything.

"Oh come on, Tobias. I haven't seen you in years. I want to get to know you – and that means getting to know the people in your life."

Tobias huffs, dropping his fork onto his empty plate. "We met at school – at the school I teach at, I should say." He leans back in his chair, crossing his arms over his chest.

Evelyn looks at him, confused, and then stares off into space for a few seconds. "So…you're her teacher? Or you were her teacher?" Tobias nods. I prepared myself for a similar situation to my parents' reactions and even Marcus's reaction – accusations, threats and trying to separate the two of us. "Well clearly you two were very good at hiding your relationship…" She shakes her head in awe.

Not what I was expecting.

Evelyn turned to look at me and the curious gleam in her eyes turned to one of pity. "I also heard about your parents, Tris. I'm so sorry for your loss. They were both good people."

"Thank you. And yes, they were good people."

She steeples her hands together and rests her chin on top of her hands, elbows resting on the table. "So I'm assuming they probably knew about the two of you. I'm just curious – how did they react to finding out that you two are together?"

I can't help but laugh a little. "They didn't react as calmly as you did, to say the least."

She laughs and then starts to ask me more questions about my life – what I'm majoring in, am I minoring in something? "It's always good to have a minor, gives you an advantage later in life." She said. What I plan on doing after college, do I plan on going on to graduate school? I was actually amazed at how unbothered she seemed by my presence and how she didn't seem to mind that Tobias and I were together.

As we spoke, Tobias had cleared the table off and then had taken a seat again, but this time he sat down to my right and gripped my hand.

Something that I did notice, though, as she continued asking me about my life was that she didn't really talk about herself or Tobias. She brought up the fact that she hadn't seen or spoken to him in a while, at least up until the past few months. But other than that, she remained completely silent on her past and Tobias's past.

And I couldn't blame her. I knew about her past. I knew that Marcus was an abusive husband and father. I knew that she hadn't had the best marriage and that it most definitely did not make her happy.

Not too long after we finished dinner, the doorbell rang and Evelyn asked Tobias to answer it. I immediately went on the defensive.

As soon as he disappeared down the hall and then he started talking to whoever was at the door, Evelyn's friendly smile still remained. "So," I start "you seem really…okay with this. Tobias and myself, I mean."

Evelyn nods, running her pointer finger around the top of her wine glass. "Oh, I am. But it's only because I know this thing you two have won't last that much longer."

My stomach drops and I stare at her, dumbfounded. "I'm sorry, what?"

She gives me a sad smile, like I'm too stupid to understand anything. "He doesn't do the long-term relationships. He never has. And you're not going to change him. The only constant in his life is me."

"Constant? You haven't talked in years." I scoff, suddenly angry – at her for saying assuming that what Tobias and I had was simply a "thing", like it could be wiped away so easily.

She tilts her head to the side, her smile disappearing altogether. "Tell me, was he there for you? When your parents died? Was he at the funeral?" I scowl at her but don't say anything. "See? Because that's something someone committed does – Tobias isn't committed." Leaning forward, towards me, she says, "You're replaceable – I am his mother, I'm not."

Tobias walks in just as she straightens up, more than likely not having heard a single thing. Evelyn gives her son a curious look. "Who was that?"

He shrugs, standing behind my chair. "Your neighbor. He saw that I was back and had wanted to stop by and say hello. Nothing interesting, really."

Evelyn stands up from her seat, yawning. "Well, I've had a very long day so I'm going to head to bed since I have to be up early for work tomorrow. You two are welcome to stay down here and watch whatever you like." She speaks to Tobias the whole time. As she leaves the dining room, she gives Tobias a small kiss on the cheek and then heads upstairs.

* * *

**I know it's short but I really just wanted to have something up since I haven't posted in a while! Unfortunately, there's only a few chapters left in this story! But, on the bright side I am officially done with classes and college is over until later in August so I will have more time to write (when I'm not working)! **

**Also, I am in the middle of writing the first chapter of my next story and I will probably have it posted later this week if anyone is interested. It isn't Divergent, it's Twilight. Mainly because I pictured all of the characters from Twilight in my head while writing and I don't want to constantly write with the Divergent characters because there's the possibility of me confusing the stories and plot-lines, so it's just as much for my sanity as it is for anyone who reads it.**


	33. Chapter 33

Chapter Thirty-Three

Our time in Washington D.C. was short. Tobias didn't want to stay more than two days and I was secretly relieved. I hadn't told him about what Evelyn had said to me about our relationship being short-term – there was no reason I needed to make their mother/son relationship even more strained than it already was. I wasn't worth it.

When we made it back to Chicago, Tobias dropped me off at my apartment after I told him I owed Christina a few days with her since he had me in D.C. and then for a good four days before that.

Before I had even had my bags through the front door, I heard someone yell "Ta-da!" and looked into the living room to see Christina waving her arms wildly, drawing attention to the coffee table overflowing with junk food – Oreos, chocolate chip cookies, Cool Ranch and Nacho Doritos along with some takeout of Mozzarella sticks and loaded fries and some wine coolers. "I figured you'd need a pick-me-up after spending the weekend with Evelyn." She gives me a sheepish smile and I walk straight towards her, wrapping my arms tightly around her.

"I love you so much." I say, my voice mumbled by her shirt.

"I know." She says and I laugh, taking a seat. "So explain everything that happened. How did she react to finding out about your relationship with Tobias?"

I launch into my story about how everything – how she reacted calmly and actually seemed to accept our "forbidden at one point" relationship and then I went into how she had basically said that I was only temporary compared to her. Christina's face twisted in anger as she bit angrily into a mozzarella stick.

"She's a bitch." She growls and I don't argue with her. "She has no right to say any of that stuff when she abandoned Eaton."

Shrugging, I grab an Oreo. "Well, she apparently thinks so and thinks that once Tobias and I are over, it'll be prime time to move in and fix their mother/son relationship."

"Does he know?" She asks, taking another mozzarella stick and dipping it in ranch – a disgusting combination if you ask me. When I shake my head, her face drops and she looks irritated. "Tris! He should know! You can't keep that from him."

I frown, picking at the bacon on top of the fries. "I don't want to ruin the relationship with his mom."

Groaning, she balls up a napkin and throws it at me. "Their relationship is already practically nonexistent! Don't let him create a relationship with her that has lies! He may not completely like her or trust her, but if she doesn't like you – he needs to know. You two are together and he has to decide whether he cares enough about your relationship to defend you to his mother or not. What happens when three months from now he wants you two to go spend another weekend with her? Are you going to play sick? Make him go alone?"

Again, I shrug. I know Christina means well and she knows what she's talking about. But my relationship with my parents wasn't the greatest thing when they got into the accident and I don't like the idea of someone I care about having a terrible relationship with their parents – Tobias's father aside. As much as I resented Evelyn for calling me temporary, I hated Marcus even more, so I tolerated Tobias discussing Evelyn. If he couldn't have both parents, he could at least have a mother – no matter how little they talked.

Thankfully Christina dropped the conversation and we brought our comforters and pillows from our bedrooms, moved the coffee table out of the way and set up our beds in the middle of the living room floor and flicking through the TV channels until we found a random chick flick. We ended up falling asleep around one in the morning.

The next morning I'm jolted awake by Christina, who keeps shaking me as much as she can, telling me to wake up. "Tris, wake the hell up. It's almost one in the afternoon."

Groaning, I roll over to face her, wincing at the stiffness in my back. Christina's already standing up, folding her comforter and dropping it on top of the couch. "Why did we sleep on the floor? We're not five – this actually hurts now." I sit up, stretching my arms.

"It also doesn't help when you keep tossing and turning in your sleep." She jokes, disappearing into the kitchen and returning with a water bottle. "I actually think that you punched me in the ribs."

I roll my eyes. "I don't punch in my sleep. Tobias would have said something by this point."

She smirks. "Well you two have a lot more in common, apparently…" When I just stare at her, she continues. "You both lie to each other." The smirk disappears and is replaced by a look of annoyance.

"Oh, God. Don't start with this." I throw the blanket off of my lap and stand up. "I don't want to talk about this."

She holds her hands up defensively and drops the topic. "Fine, we won't talk about that. But there is something we do have to talk about – it's almost been a year, Tris."

It was funny – my entire life, as long as I've been friends with Christina, I've never really been good at the double meanings in people's words. At times I was really good at it, but only if I was focused enough. Christina caught me off guard, I was too focused on arguing with myself about whether or not to talk to Tobias about his mother. She caught me off guard and I was confused about what she was talking about.

At least for a few seconds.

"This isn't something I want to talk about either, Chris." My voice is small and I feel a familiar knot start to form in my stomach.

Before she can say anything else, I head into the bathroom and turn on the shower faucet.

After my shower, I grab a granola bar from the kitchen and tell Christina that I'm meeting up with Tobias. I know it's childish of me to just ignore Christina, but I'd rather be childish than deal with everything right now.

When I get to Tobias's place, I let myself in with the key he recently gave me. The living room is slightly messy – two empty pizza boxes sitting on the kitchen counter along with a rather large amount of empty beer bottles. I shake my head. Maybe Tobias visiting his mother didn't make him as happy as I thought it did. Fantastic.

There's a large lump of blankets on the couch that's shaped like a body so I shake what I'm hoping is someone's shoulder. "Tobias…wake up." There's a little bit of movement, but he doesn't wake up. "Wake up!" I shake him harder and the blanket is pulled back from his head. But it isn't Tobias. "Zeke?"

"Tris! Holy shit, you scared me! Why are you waking me up? What time is it?" Zeke sits up, rubbing his reddened eyes. Well now I knew why there were so many beer bottles lying around.

"It's almost two in the afternoon." I say slowly. "What are you doing here? And where's Tobias?"

He gets up off the couch and heads into the kitchen, turning on the coffee maker. "I came over last night to have a few drinks with Tobias." He must see me eyeing the bottles on the counter because he says, "okay, maybe our few drinks turned into a lot of drinks. And I don't know where Tobias is. Since I was asleep when you barged in."

Just then the front door opens and Tobias walks in, balancing a box of donuts in one hand and closing the door with the other. "Tris…Hey!" he says when he sees me, reasonably surprised.

"Dude," Zeke starts, snatching the box of donuts out of Tobias's hand. "Your girlfriend's rude when it comes to waking people up."

Tobias laughs and I just roll my eyes. "You could probably sleep through a fighter jet flying by the window. You wouldn't wake up." I threw back at him, which caused Tobias to laugh even harder. He walks over to stand behind me, wrapping both his arms around my waist and planting a kiss on my cheek. He seemed rather happy this morning.

Zeke polished off four donuts and two cups of coffee before he told Tobias he had to leave. They hugged good-bye and then Tobias took a seat next to where I had planted myself once the two boys started talking.

"Is everything okay?" Tobias asked. "Is there a reason you came over?"

There was, but now I wasn't so sure I wanted to explain why I came over. He seemed happier than I had seen him in a while. I didn't want to ruin that happiness.

Shaking my head, I lean into his side, hiding my face from him. "No, I just…I just wanted to be with you, that's all." If he thinks I'm lying, he doesn't say anything. He just wraps an arm around me and kisses the top of my head.

I wasn't aware that I had actually fallen asleep until I woke up, throwing myself off the couch and running as fast as I could to the kitchen sink. All I heard from Tobias was a shocked, "Shit." And then I heard his footsteps following me and then his hands were pulling my hair back away from my face as I retched into the kitchen sink. There was nothing in my stomach for it to get rid of, but I kept gagging, my body wanting to get rid of _something_. Tobias was rubbing my back, silent, until my body finally gave up and realized it was pointless. I was sweating and shaking, even as Tobias drew me into him.

"It was the nightmare again." It wasn't a question. "Tris, this is stressing you out to the point where you're getting sick. I know you don't want to see a therapist, but you need to do something – talk to somebody! You're worrying me."

Letting go of me, he reached into the fridge and pulled out a bottle of Gatorade and handed it to me. I sank to the floor, relishing in the feel of the cool cabinets pressed against my back, the cold seeping in through my t-shirt.

Tobias sits down on the floor facing me. "Please, Tris. Talk to me."

Taking a sip out of the Gatorade, I pull my hair back and up into a pony tail. "The nightmare isn't the only thing stressing me out…" I start, talking slowly and thinking about what I'm going to say before I say it. "When we were in D.C., with your Mom, she…explained to me the reason she was so calm and collected about our relationship." Looking up at him, I can see that he might know where this is going. "She said that I was just…temporary. She said I wasn't going to be a permanent fixture in your life while she was."

The earlier look of concern for me was replaced by one of anger – angry with me for hiding this? Or angry with his mom for saying that? I didn't know, but I saw his hands curl into fists.

"She had no right…" He growls. "Not after we haven't talked in years, she had no right to say that to you!"

My stomach drops and I move across the floor to where he's sitting. I reach for his hands, trying to loosen his fists. "Tobias, stop. Don't get angry. She was probably just trying to look out for you." I can't believe I was defending Evelyn! And here I had actually thought he'd be the one defending her, I thought I'd have trouble convincing him that she had actually said that to me.

He's not looking at me, he's staring – glaring, actually – at the floor. Dropping his hands, I place my hands on either side of his face, forcing him to look at me. "You are not allowed to be angry right now. If anything, I should be angry."

"I'm only angry because I know she's wrong – you're not temporary." He finally speaks, looking at me. "I don't want you to be temporary." His voice is almost a whisper.

He's still looking at me, his blue eyes are big and wide like a child's. My heart contracts and I brush my thumb along his cheek. "I love you, Tris." He says and I smile. "I love you so much."  
Without missing a beat, he grips my elbows and pulls me into him, crushing his lips against mine. My chest presses against his, my knees sliding on the tiled floor. The kiss is warm and fierce and ignites a fire that I can feel deep in my bones and it warms my entire being.

I can only handle kissing in this position for a few minutes before my knees start to get sore from being on the cold tiled floor and I'm sure Tobias's back hurts leaning back against the counters. I pull away and wrap my arms around the back of his neck. "I just have two requests…" I start and he looks at me. "The first is that I need a date to Caleb and Susan's wedding in a few weeks."

He smiles, nodding. "I would be happy to be your date. What's the second thing?"

The second request resulted in him driving the two of us a little over half an hour out of the city and to a small cemetery outside of the neighborhood where Caleb and I grew up. We drove past the small elementary school where I fell off of a large slide and knocked out three teeth and where I remember seeing Caleb sitting on the ground, clutching his broken arm. It was also where I had met Christina and we decided then and there that we would be best friends.

"We're here…" Tobias says, his tone soft and anxious. He probably didn't know what kind of reaction to expect from me.

I climb out of the car and Tobias grabs my hand, acting as an anchor. The last time I was here, I had Christina with me and she was in Tobias's place – holding my hand and being my anchor for me in my time of need.

We make our way to the plot of land where my parents rest. Two typical headstones, side-by-side, one with "Natalie Prior" and the other with "Andrew Prior". Both had their birth years and the year they died. I felt a lump form in my throat and Tobias gave my hand a tight squeeze and I tried to give him a reassuring smile.

Sinking down to my knees, I place a set of flowers in front of both of the headstones. "So Caleb and Susan are getting married in two weeks…" I feel ridiculous kneeling in the grass and talking to two cold slabs of stone with Tobias standing behind me. "I know you'd both be really happy." I look over at my Mom's headstone. "Mom, you'd probably be with Susan twenty-four seven, fixing her dress and trying to find the perfect veil even this close to the wedding date." I smile. "And you would probably be fussing over the food, Dad. Or you'd probably be trying to convince Caleb to have pizzas and beer at the reception." There's no point in trying to fight off the tears at this point. "I know…I know you two didn't approve of my relationship with Tobias, but I'm happy. I'm so happy with him. When you two left and he came back into my life, it was like a piece of me was whole again. He can't replace you two, not in any way, but…I love him. I love him and I know that you two would love him too. You would approve of how protective he is and how he stands up for what he believes in. And he loves me, damaged and all." I sniffle, wiping some tears away. "I'm so, so sorry that the last conversation we all had was an argument and I'm so sorry that I never told you guys I loved you, one last time. I never said good-bye. I love you both, so much." I felt Tobias's warm hand on my shoulder. I reach up and grab his hand.

* * *

**This took me forever to finish. I just had absolutely no idea how to format this chapter and where to take it. But i figured it out, obviously. Anyways, I have some good news and bad news:**

**good news - i'm going to be posting the first chapter of my next story within the next few days.**

**bad news - the next chapter of this story is going to be the last chapter. I had wanted to push it to a few more chapters, but after basically having to force myself through writing this chapter i feel like it would just be better to end it after the next chapter. **


	34. Chapter 34

Chapter Thirty-Four

"Okay, so I know it's extremely late to be asking this but will you please be a bridesmaid?" Susan was looking at me, her eyes wide and pleading. I had been with her and Caleb all day, helping them plan the wedding that was only a few weeks away. "You've been so helpful and I feel bad that you've been putting so much work into this wedding and I never even thought to ask you to be a bridesmaid."

She gives me a bright smile and I can't say no to her. "Of course, Susan. I'd be honored." I just wasn't too thrilled about the blue dresses she had picked out for the bridesmaids. They weren't the most flattering gowns.

When I had gotten home, later that night, and told Christina about my being a bridesmaid, she burst into full on giggles.

"What is so funny?" I demanded, slightly annoyed.

She stops laughing, taking a few deep breaths. "I just never pictured you being a bridesmaid in your brother's wedding. And I've seen the dresses Susan picked out – you're going to look like a little girl." She bites the insides of her cheeks, trying to hold back more laughter. "Tobias is going to look so awkward as your date!" And then she starts to laugh again.

I throw a pillow at her, successfully hitting her in the face.

"You seem better." Christina comments, finally able to stop laughing, when I sit down next to her on the couch. "Happier, I mean."

I shrug. "I feel better." And for the first time in a while, it was true. I _was_ happier and I was better. I hadn't had a nightmare since the one at Tobias's. Visiting my parents had made me feel a lot better and afterwards, it felt like a weight was physically lifted off of my shoulders and that the dark cloud that had been following me around since their deaths was finally gone and the sky was a nice, bright blue. I made a point to go and visit their graves at least once a week. I didn't need all the guilt to build back up after finally getting rid of it.

After telling Tobias about what Evelyn told me, I was terrified that he would push me away and not want to be with me anymore; I was wrong. He had seemed to want to prove to me that I wasn't temporary in his life.

I felt bad because he stopped talking to Evelyn. I didn't think that he should leave his mother out of his life – no matter how much of a bitch she was – but he seemed intent on proving her wrong. I told him that he should at least keep in contact with her every once in a while, but he seemed to be extremely upset with what she said to me. I felt terrible that I was the reason his mother was no longer in his life.

"It was bound to happen at some point." Tobias said one night, after I brought it up. He talked about it so casually, like it was no big deal.

It was frustrating.

Although, both him and Christina seem to believe that my obsessive need to keep Tobias and Evelyn in contact stems from the loss of my parents. I wouldn't ever admit it, but that was kind of the reason I was so worried about their relationship – mine had ended on a bad note and I had carried the guilt around with me for months. I still carry the guilt around.

But it was mornings like these – the mornings where I woke up with one of Tobias's arms wrapped tightly around my waist and holding me against his chest and the feel of him peppering kisses along my neck – where the guilt was shoved into a drawer and locked away. I could forget everything in the world when I was in bed with Tobias. Being close to him made me feel safe and secure, no need to worry or feel guilty about anything. I was able to just enjoy the feel of him holding me and the feel of his lips against mine.

"Good morning." Tobias mumbled, nuzzling my neck. I smiled, turning around to face him. "That shirt suits you very well."

Smiling, I look down at the black t-shirt advertising a band that I didn't really care for. At some point in the middle of the night, I had woken up and stolen one of his shirts from his closet. Tobias, however, was still shirtless and it was a sight that I would probably never get tired of.

He presses his lips against mine and I hitch one leg over top of his. He smiles against my lips. "No bad dreams?" When I shake my head, the smile broadens.

"Disappointed you couldn't use your 'bare hands' to fight them off?" I joke, running my fingers lightly down his cheek.

Tobias shrugs. "Definitely. Although, I'm sure that's why you were safe last night – they were too terrified of me." One of his hands moves down my back and stops at the bottom of the t-shirt, playing with the frayed hem.

I narrow my eyes at him. "Or maybe someone kept me up late last night and I was too exhausted to put together any kind of dream." He smirks and moves his hand under my shirt, raising goosebumps all over my body.

"Well…maybe we can get back to what we were doing last night…" His voice trails off as he leans in and presses his lips against my neck. I lose all train of thought and grip his upper arm.

My stomach growls and it helps draw my thoughts together. I shove away from him and sit up, placing my bare feet on the floor. "I am starving so I would really rather go eat some waffles."

I hear him laugh and I glance at him from over my shoulder. "Wow, I cannot believe that I come in second to waffles."

"I love you, but everybody comes in second to food." I headed into the kitchen and he followed not too long after me – still shirtless. "That," I said, pointing to his bare chest, "Is very distracting and unless you want me to burn the waffles, I suggest you put a shirt on."

I was standing behind the counter, mixing the waffle batter, when he came up behind me and wrapped both his arms around my waist. "This isn't helping…" But I was smiling.

He presses a kiss to my temple. "What time do we have to be at the wedding venue?" He asks, stepping away from me and opening the fridge. He takes out a bottle of water, twisting the cap off.

"Well, I'm supposed to be there by twelve to help Susan get ready. You don't have to be there until three, when the wedding ceremony starts."

Turning around to face him, I see him giving me a knowing smile. "What kind of date would I be if I didn't show up with you?" He places the water bottle down on the counter and then steps towards me, placing his hands on my hips. "I want to get in good with your brother and I think showing up with you would be a good start."

Shaking my head, I laugh. "That makes no sense. Besides, Caleb already approves of you."

He shrugs. "Oh well." And then he leans down and presses his lips against mine.

Kissing him is nice and he knows it distracts me, so I pull away from him and take a deep breath. "I need to make breakfast."

Tobias shakes his head, pulling me close to him again. "Who needs breakfast?" And then suddenly he's throwing me over his shoulder and I squeal, giggling, and try to wrap my arms around his stomach as he carries me towards the bedroom.

Later on, I'm standing in the bedroom and zipping up my dress. The dress wasn't as bad as I thought it'd be. It was a dark, royal blue with cap sleeves, a thin matching blue sash wrapped around the waist, lace detailing and stopped right above my knees. I paired it with a pair of black pumps.

I really wasn't a big fan of high heels and knew that as soon as the ceremony was over, I'd be ditching the heels and going the rest of the night barefoot.

Tobias is waiting for me in the living room and I'm almost breathless when I see him in his suit. I had seen him at the ball last year, right before we had told my parents about our relationship, and even then I had been amazed at how good he looked in a suit.

"Wow." Is all he says when he looks up from his phone. I feel my face get warmer as I walk over to him. "Ready to go?" He asks, holding his hand out to me. I nod and take his hand in mine.

We arrive a small church right outside of Chicago, not too far from where Caleb and I grew up, and I leave Tobias standing with some of the groomsmen and significant others to the bridesmaids. I stop by room Susan is in and am slightly surprised to see that she's already almost ready – her hair and makeup is done and she's just stepping into her gown when I walk in.

"I'm sorry, I'm late. Traffic was terrible." Susan gives me a warm smile, but her eyes look like they're going to bug out of her head.

"You're fine, Beatrice. I'm actually good here, but I know that Caleb wants to see you before the ceremony."

Turning around, I head down the hallway to the only other room being used and knock, waiting to enter. Caleb opens the door and he looks almost as anxious as Susan does. I smile at him. "Where have you been?" He asks, sounding as anxious as he looks.

Taking a seat, I watch him pace around the room while trying to fix his cufflinks. "I was caught in traffic. Why did you need me?"

"I don't know." He shrugs, giving up on the cufflinks. "I needed someone sane. All my friends are just trying to get me to drink, which – by the way – is not a good thing to do when you're anxious."

Standing up, I grab his wrist and fix the cufflink. "Well, I may seem relaxed but I am just as anxious as you are. Not so much anxious as I am…upset." I sigh, reaching for his other hand. "Mom and Dad should be here. Dad should be in this room with you and fixing your cufflinks and offering you words of advice on how to keep your wife happy. I'm your little sister, I'm not married, I have no words of advice – well besides 'don't be an asshole'." The familiar guilt started tugging again and I felt myself choke back a sob. "This is something they shouldn't be missing out on." I can't believe I was the one crying. I shouldn't be crying.

Caleb wraps his arms around me and hugs me tightly. "I know that. God, Beatrice, I know that. I keep looking over my shoulder, waiting for Dad to try and tell me I'm missing my tie or for Mom to come in, crying, telling me how beautiful Susan looks."

"She does look beautiful…" I mumble into his chest, sniffling.

He laughs and looks down at me. "Well, she won't look beautiful when she's red with anger because I'm late for our wedding." He wipes under my eyes and presses a kiss to my forehead. "Mom and Dad may not be here, but you are – that's what matters. I still have my family here."

I can't help but laugh. He wasn't wrong. There's a little voice in the back of my head reminding me that I almost lost him – but a bigger part was reminding myself that he was here. He was here and I was going to watch my brother get married. "Alright, I think it's time for you to get out there. Before your bride realizes that you're running late." I give him one more hug before heading back to Susan's room.

Once I was back with Susan, we all started to line up for the procession. I was third in line, behind the maid-of-honor and then one of her cousins. I was also walking with Susan's brother; who Caleb had asked to be one of his groomsmen.

During the ceremony, I focused on the bride and groom but at the same time I kept glancing over to where Tobias and Christina were sitting – in the spot that should have been reserved for my parents. My throat felt tight for a few seconds and then they both smiled at me and I returned their smiles.

By the end of the ceremony, I was crying – and for once, it wasn't because I was sad. I was so, so happy for Caleb and Susan. I was crying because it was a beautiful ceremony and Caleb had lived through a terrible accident and had made it to this day.

Once we were at the reception, I looked around the large ballroom full of people, searching for Christina and Tobias. I found Christina first, or she found me.

She wrapped her arms tightly around me and I saw Will was right behind her, smiling and looks handsome in his suit. "You look beautiful, Tris." Christina says, pulling back.

I roll my eyes. "Not as beautiful as you." I remark, gesturing to her red and yellow sundress that popped against her dark skin. "And you look very handsome, Will."

He gives me one of his devil-may-care smiles and shrugs. "Gotta keep up with her hotness." He says, wrapping an arm around Christina's waist. Something grabs his attention behind me, and I turn around to see Tobias heading in our direction. "Eaton." Will nods to Tobias and Christina gives him a polite smile. The couple excuses themselves to go and find our table.

I turn to face Tobias and am, once again, distracted by him in a suit. "You looked absolutely stunning up there." He compliments me, leaning down to give me a kiss. "Shall we go and find out table?"

Caleb and Susan enter the ballroom not too long after we're all seated at our tables and the entire congregation claps and there are a few hollers from Caleb's friends. They took their seats at the only rectangular table, where the rest of the wedding party was seated, and from there, Caleb's friends and Susan's friends all had speeches prepared.

After the speeches, they move to the dance floor for their first dance soon followed by Susan and her father dancing. Caleb moves off to the side and I feel my stomach clench. I knew he had wanted to have a dance with our mother and I could see past his smile that he really wished, at this moment, that our parents were here.

Soon more couples were making their way onto the dance floor once Caleb had stolen Susan back from her father. Will and Christina made their way and I watched as Christina wrapped her arms around the back of Will's head.

I was slightly awed by the fact that Will was actually dancing. Back in high school, he hadn't even wanted to slow dance at our senior prom.

Tobias clears his throat and stands up, taking his jacket off and placing it on the back of his seat. He extends his hand out to me, smiling. "Care to dance?"

I stared at his hand, open-mouthed. "You dance?"

"Yeah and I don't mean to sound arrogant, but I'm a pretty badass slow dancer." I roll my eyes but take his hand, letting him pull me to my feet.

He pulled me onto the dance floor and then wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me close, and letting me wrap mine around the back of his neck. More couples slowly started to drift onto the dancefloor, surrounding us. But even with all of them surrounding us, I still felt like it was just Tobias and myself.

"You know," he starts, swaying us from side-to-side. "last year, I never would have pictured us here. In public – together."

I can't help but smile at him. "It's…surprising. Definitely not something I had ever planned. The beginning of my senior year, I just wanted to coast through the year and get it done and over with." Shrugging, I look up at him. I was shorter than him now then I was earlier. I had kicked my heels off as soon as I sat down at our table. "And then once things started to happen between us, I thought we'd be caught."

"Well, we never actually got caught – we turned ourselves in to your parents. Jeanine Matthews had just had suspicions, nothing she could have gone off of."

For a few seconds, I remember the day she had pulled me into her office – accusing me of sleeping with Tobias. I knew Peter Hayes had been the one to turn us in, he had never liked me. I hadn't handled that extremely well and it resulted in her keeping a close eye on myself and Tobias and any interaction we had during school.

Shaking my head, I sigh. "Honestly, after telling my parents, I actually thought that we'd have to break up. I was terrified that my dad would call the cops on you. And then the night of prom…"

"Yeah, that probably wasn't the best time. I probably ruined your night." He looked guilty and I gave him a smile.

"Honestly, the dance wasn't that fun anyways. But yeah, you leaving me did really suck."

It was amazing, I thought. For months after he broke up with me, I was miserable. And then him not showing up to the hospital? I was an absolute wreck and had gone to extreme measures to try and forget the pain, even for a few hours. The partying and drinking was ridiculous and stupid. And then when I was awake and sober, any thought of Tobias or anything that reminded me of him would cause me to break down. Christina never knew – I had my breakdowns when she left for class or for work or when I was in the privacy of my own room.

We stopped moving and Tobias clasped both his hands on either side of my face. "I will never forgive myself for that. And because of that, you never have to worry about me leaving you – not unless you want me to. I will spend the rest of my life making that up to you."

"That might be a long, long time down the road." My stomach clenches, in a good way, and I smile.

He leans down to press his lips against mine. I lose myself in the kiss and feel like I can almost melt into him. I stand on my tip-toes, trying to get closer to him.

"I love you." He whispers against my lips.

As cliché as it sounds, a year ago I never would have even imagined that I would be here. I didn't think I would be dating a teacher of mine, someone who was a lot older than me. I especially didn't think that I would be as in love with him as I am. I also could never imagine that I would be able to be this happy after losing both of my parents and almost losing my brother. After they both died, I never thought I would be able to move on and live my life. I thought the pain would never go away – it doesn't, but the pain is dulled by the love in my life. I still have my brother, I have Christina and Will and I have Tobias.

I smile against his lips. "I love you too."

* * *

**The end! AHH, okay. So I know that this took awhile to get up, but I had some...family matters to deal with and whenever I wanted to write, i just couldn't actually write anything - nothing came out. **

**But thank you guys, so, so much for sticking with me through this entire story. Thank you for continuing to read it and comment. All of your reviews always made my day and made me feel proud of my work. I never would have gotten this far if I didn't have you guys backing me up. Honestly, I didn't expect this story to get as popular as it did. I'm so, so grateful and can't express it enough.**

**Also, my next story is almost ready. I have the first chapter almost completed and it will probably be up before the 11th. It might even be up tomorrow!**

**Again, thank you all so much for reading this story! I love you all and hope you enjoyed it! **


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